The Princess With The Purple Heart
by ExecutiveShrimp
Summary: AU, 2x1: Don't ask, don't tell.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note:**

 **Trying something different with very short chapters. I see so many other authors do this and it seems to work well for them, so I figured I should give it a shot. I hope this way I can get some momentum going and put out quick updates. They won't all be** ** _this_** **short.**

 **Since Upload-Gate happened (unable being to upload/post new material since Saturday) there has been a delay in getting this first chapter online, which means the second is almost done already.**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 ** _One_**

"Fresh meat!" Private First Class Chapple hollers as six new soldiers climb out of the back of the truck that has just pulled in through the North gate of the compound. The other two trucks with supplies and the accompanying Humvees come to a screeching halt at the back, stirring up a cloud of dust.

More soldiers emerge from their barracks and crowd the caravan.

"Rookie One, Rookie Two, Rookie Three," another private declares, passing by the line of new arrivals that get in formation to await instructions from their Sergeant. He taps their heads and flicks the cap off one of them to mess with them.

"Hey, I outrank you!" The Lance Corporal objects, bending down to pick up his cap. He brushes off the dry sand before putting it back on and resumes his at-ease position.

Private Follander scoffs and marches off. The Lance Corporal will soon find out that trying to pull rank on anyone isn't going to fly at Camp Sharana.

Duo is drawn to the commotion even though he has no interest in the new unit, nor the supplies that are being unloaded. He maneuvers around the men that carry crates of ammunition and weapons, as well as innocuous supplies like new fatigues and boots, from the truck to the storage building. He searches the faces, dipping his head to look under everyone's visors, which cast a sharp, dark shadow on their features as the rays of the Afghani sun beat down on them. He perks up when one of the men from his unit, standing by the Humvee at the very back, exclaims excitedly: "Here he is!"

Follander jogs over, calling: "Purple Heart!" And Duo follows him to the back.

All he sees is a huddle of men standing off to the side of the Humvee's passenger side until one of them urges with a mocking tone: "Take a step back, give him some space to get used to being back in the oven." The men part and Duo spots the Corporal standing amidst them. His dry, cracked lips hurt when a silly smile appears on his face. He pays no attention to the Staff Sergeant and the Gunnery Sergeant approaching the new unit that dutifully give salute and he rushes over to his own unit.

"Purple Heart," he says and his smile widens when blue eyes look his way. He cuts through the crowd of six men and pulls the soldier into a tight hug, excessively patting his back before pulling away and holding onto his shoulders as he studies him. "You look good," he concludes and Duo is relieved to be able to say so. He didn't looks so good last time he saw him.

"He looks _moisturized_ ," Follander chimes in. "Looks like them rookies again."

"He'll dry out soon enough," another retorts.

Heero's gaze flits from one man to another, looking grateful to see all of them.

Duo fits an arm around the shorter man's shoulders and pulls him along. "Let me show you our new digs!" He glances at the strap of the heavy duffel bag cutting into Heero's shoulder but resists the urge to offer to carry it for him.

"I like it," Heero declares, looking around himself.

"You ain't seen nothing yet. We have actual plumbing here," Duo reveres.

The Corporal chuckles. "Yeah, that's not actually all that impressive after just spending six weeks stateside. You remember we have plumbing there too, right?" He jabs his elbow at Duo's ribs.

"Barely. C'mon. I have a surprise for you." He steers him past the Mess Hall and Sergeant offices to the barracks by the east wall of the compound. The buildings are just small, stone squares with flat roofs, baked by the relentless desert sun. Each barrack only has a single, small window – which isn't really a window so much as a few missing bricks in the wall, by the front door. He guides his friend to a smaller barrack in the back, where a green curtain billows out and the door is still open. He rambles on about the amenities of the new camp.

Last time Heero was with the unit, they were stationed at Forward Operating Base Delaram, which was a hell-hole, where twenty-four men were crammed into one tent, and you had to dig a hole outside of the compound's fencing every time you needed to take a dump. FOB Sharana was paradise in comparison and he was giddy to show Heero around and get him settled in as soon as possible, so everything could return to normal. It had been odd having to go six weeks without the blue-eyed Corporal by his side.

"Ta-da!" Duo declares proudly as he ushers his friend into the small space. "I already made your bed for you." He nods at one of only two beds in the barrack.

"Just two beds?" Heero marvels.

"Yeah. There are six- and four-person barracks too, but I confiscated this one for us. Since you got shot and all."

"Well, if you'd really want to do me a favor you'd let me room with someone else," Heero jokes.

"Liar."

"And you've had this all to yourself since you got reassigned here?"

"Nah, I've been stuck with Chapple, but I kicked his ass back to bunk with Follander, Flint and Lindsey."

Heero walks in and puts his duffel down by the freshly made bed and takes off his cap so he can wipe the sweat off his brow with the back of his hands.

"Missed ya, man," Duo admits, but before the other can tease him over the sentiment, he extols: "And look at this! Actual, honest to God, walls." He pats the brick wall, which is dusty just like everything else in Afghanistan.

Heero chuckles. "Very impressive."

"Wanna see the Rec Hall? We have a fucking basketball hoop and a _Foosball-table_."

"I should check in with the Staff Sergeant first."

"Right. Right." He chews on the inside of his cheek, trying to calm his excessive enthusiasm. "Gotta make us all look bad by getting right back to followin' the rules and shit."

Heero doesn't respond to the mockery with anything more than a smile. He heads out, but pauses in the doorway and looks back at the excitable Lance Corporal. "What's with the new nickname?" He wonders with a tilt of his head. "I had just gotten used to being Rookie Four."

"Well, there's a new batch of rookies now," Duo explains offhandedly. The unit had been calling him that since he first joined them on their tour over two years ago, only because he was new on base at the time and remained the newest addition to their unit because, thankfully, they hadn't lost anyone since the soldier he was sent to replace. He was due for a new moniker, because everyone knew damn well Heero was the best of them. They were all skeptical of him at first, because he was short and his delicate features belied his resolute commitment to the Marines and to their unit specifically, but he soon proved all of their doubts wrong.

"So it's Purple Heart from now on, huh?"

"Ahuh. You earned it, brother." He forces on a smirk. Remembering the day he "earned it" still makes it difficult to smile. "It fits. And we all need to be reminded of what kind of guy you are."

"Oh yeah?" Heero quirks his eyebrow, fishing for a compliment.

"Yeah. The kind of guy that is brave enough to save our asses… but dumb enough to get shot." Heero's laughter rings in Duo's ears and it hits him how much he has missed the sound. He chuckles along sheepishly.

"I'll be back in a bit and you can show me the Foosball-table."

"See ya, Purple Heart."

"Bye-bye, Princess."

* * *

 **You know where this is headed… ;) Smut and Angst, my friends. Smut and Angst.**

 **What do you think about our favorite boys getting dropped into the Afghani-war (story is set in the Don't-ask-don't-tell era)? I know it's nothing new, but it's new for me. I promise I won't get too political.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note:**

 **Told ya I was almost done :)**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Two**_

During their daily drills the next morning, everyone picks on Heero, calling him slow and fat after his six-week leave. Duo joins in, but secretly keeps a close eye on his friend. He is not as fit as he is used to seeing him, jogging along near the back of the pack, rather than several strides ahead of everyone, but he just needs some time to build up his stamina and get used to the severe heat again.

All of them have sweat staining their faded shirts at the back, chest and under their arms as they run along the inside perimeter of Camp Sharana, in the trail of their Staff Sergeant. Because of the temperatures, they were mercifully allowed to take off their jackets, but the Staff still made them carry their fifty-pound backpacks.

After two miles, the Staff declares that they've run enough, but then commands them to drop down into the sand and tiger-crawl the next two hundred yards.

Duo's limbs are shaky from exertion and it's a cumbersome process trying to crawl while balancing the backpack on his shoulders, which wants to topple sideways with each movement. Heero is beside him, grunting, but Duo doesn't ask if he's doing okay, he just keeps his pace purposefully slow to remain next to him.

"I hate sand," Follander grouses.

"Quote the Prequels and I'll fucking kill you," another threatens through gritted teeth.

When they are allowed to get up on their feet again and put their backpacks down, Heero's breaths come out wheezing. His face is red and his hair is soaking wet. Rather than show concern, Duo mocks him, but it's his way of letting his friend know that he notices that he is struggling and all he has to do is ask for help if he needs it.

"Yeah? Your mom seemed to like it when I got all red-faced and sweaty," Heero quips with a sparkle in his eyes.

"Fuck you, Purple Heart."

They finish with push-ups and burpees and are then allowed to hit the showers.

Unlike at Camp Delaram, Camp Sharana has actual showers, with pressurized, hot water. They don't have to pull on a string to have cold water spill on them from a bucket. There is less privacy though. The entire unit crams into the tiled space with another unit that has just returned from their perimeter patrol and they are one showerhead short. Lindsey complains as he gets muscled away from the spot he had claimed and has to wait his turn. Being the youngest in the unit, he has little choice.

Duo shamelessly observes Heero's naked body. They are standing next to each other under a spray of water that is comfortably warm. He studies the round scar on the front of his left shoulder, knowing there is a matching scar on the back from where the bullet cut straight through him. The two gunshot wounds high in his abdomen are obscured by the long surgical scar that runs down diagonally from his sternum to his side, following the lower ribs.

The last time someone from their unit got shot, he died. Which is how they were introduced to Corporal Heero Yuy, who was added to their unit to even out the number.

Heero catches him looking and says softly: "I'm fine." He correctly read the question in Duo's eyes.

Feeling uneasy at being caught showing concern, Duo scoffs. "I wasn't worried. Just thinking to myself what a poor motherfucker you are. Those scars make you even uglier."

They both laugh. One of the main reasons Heero had trouble earning the unit's respect when he first joined was precisely because he was so attractive he was actually _pretty_. Duo had been faced with similar teasing when he enlisted. Everyone used to call him "Pretty boy", and whenever he stood at attention, they'd say: "Strike a pose!". Nowadays they call him "Princess". He doesn't give a shit what anybody calls him, he knows they are his brothers and it's just what brothers do.

The unit gets dressed and goes through the daily chore of checking their equipment and cleaning the sand out of their rifles. At lunch they gather in the mess hall and Duo cuts the line to ensure they don't run out of Mac and Cheese before it's his turn. While deployed, the Mac and Cheese served by the army cooks is his favorite meal, even though the cheese basically hardens to a yellow plastic when it cools. His favorite meal at home are barbeque ribs – they don't serve that in the mess hall.

Duo always makes a distinction between his favorite things at home and his favorite things at war. He figures it is good to compartmentalize. But because he always whines about how much he misses the luxuries of being home – and because of how he looked in an old picture that they found of him – they started calling him "Princess".

He gets two servings of Mac and Cheese and walks the tray with two plates back to the table where Heero and some of the other guys from the unit are already seated. It's hot in the mess hall, but it's better than being outside while the sun is at its highest point in the sky. The bright red sunburn in his neck hurts like a bitch. He never had that problem when he had his long hair, but when he joined the Marine Corps, he had to part with his long braid. Just like Heero, he keeps his hair as long and wild as the grooming standards permit: longer on top and faded down the sides. Since enlisting, Duo has gotten a lot of tattoos to rebel and express his individuality, in the absence of the hair that had become his trademark in adolescence.

He drops down on the bench next to Heero and puts one of the plates in front of him.

"I asked for the lasagna, Princess Peach."

"You'll eat your Mac and Cheese and you'll like it, you kumquat. "

Heero is already digging in.

Follander cups his chin in his palm, propping his head up on the table and sighs dramatically. "I missed this."

"Yeah, mommy and daddy bitching at each other – can't live without it," Chapple joins in dryly.

Everyone becomes quiet as they wolf down their food. Not until the plates are empty does Follander speak up again.

"So, how was home, Purple Heart? Worth getting shot?" He grins. "Cuz I'm not eligible for leave for another seven weeks, but my girl just sent me this picture...-" He doesn't finish the sentence but makes a sound that is plenty descriptive.

"I spent most of my time stateside bedridden at Bethesda, away from my family, high on painkillers," Heero summarizes flatly and then concludes: "So it was pretty great."

Duo lets out a laugh. Most of the men in his unit have a similar, dry sense of humor, but nothing amuses him more than the serious, stoic soldier cracking sarcastic jokes. He was very different when he first joined the unit and Duo likes to think that he has had a positive effect on him. Heero was a tough nut to crack, but he is pretty sure he cracked him.

"What's the first thing you ate?"

"Jello. At the hospital."

Chapple snorts. "You know what I'm asking! What's the first thing you had?"

"Chipotle."

Everyone groans with jealousy. "What else?"

"I don't know. Fucking everything."

"Barbeque ribs?" Duo asks, while practically drooling at the thought of all the great foods he is missing out on in favor of the damn Mac and Cheese.

"No."

" _Stupid!_ Here, I'll shoot you right now so you can go back and fix your mistake."

The guys ask Heero more questions about his recovery, but they keep it light and silly, like asking whether he did the nasty with one of the nurses and wondering what hurt more: getting shot or having his mother slap him for getting shot. Heero plays along and his answers are a mixture of truths, half-truths and dirty, fabricated anecdotes, never sharing with them in how much pain he had been and how scared he was, having to be flown back to the United States for a surgery the medics couldn't perform here. He could have lost his liver and part of the large intestines. Heero had been much more candid with Duo the previous night, in the privacy of their shared barrack. He had cried recounting how fearful he had been that he would get discharged from the Corps and that he would be "abandoning" his unit.

Heero shows none of that emotion to the others. He loves them all like brothers, but he doesn't let them see him be vulnerable, the way he allows Duo to see him.

Duo laughs, but he can't help thinking back to that day, when they were on patrol through Janabad and took fire out of nowhere, with no place for them to seek cover other than the Jeep they were escorting. Three insurgents were behind a jagged ridge over a hundred yards away and pinned them down with an endless barrage of bullets. The driver of the Jeep had to get out and join them on the other side to shield himself. Every time they tried to look around the Jeep to get a visual on the enemy, they were targeted. They couldn't get a single shot in and they didn't see that two insurgents quickly crept up to them, until they were within throwing distance and a grenade landed by the rear, left bumper of Jeep, within a few feet of them.

Heero hadn't hesitated. When all the others reactively curled in on themselves, as if that would have protected them from the blast and shrapnel, Heero got up from his position by the front tire – he would have been farthest away from the blast - and walked into the line of fire to kick the grenade away before it exploded.

The first bullet cut clean through his shoulder and had him falling to the ground. The grenade went off in the distance, no one was harmed thanks to Heero's quick thinking. With the insurgents focusing fire on the grounded soldier, Duo and Follander were able to come out of hiding and pick them off one by one, but not before Heero got hit two more times.

It had been the scariest moment of Duo's life. For the first time since joining the Marine Corps, he wished he hadn't been there and wished he had never met any of these men that he had grown to love so much. The unit had always been close-knit, but especially the conditions of Camp Delaram solidified their bond and Duo and Heero had gravitated towards each other. Duo had jokingly declared him his "BSF": Best Soldier Friend, different from his "BFF" back home – the friend he had known since Junior High. In spite of their friendship, they had never spent any time together stateside and had never met each other's families and hometown friends, having grown up on opposite coasts. As Duo applied pressure to Heero's wound, he dreaded having to meet the soldier's parents for the first time at his funeral.

"Ground Control to Major Tom," Follander says, waving his hand in front of Duo's face to get his attention.

Duo blinks and pulls himself out of his thoughts. He offers them an awkward smile. "Sorry."

"You were still thinking about barbeque ribs, weren't you?" Heero jests, but from the look in his eyes it is evident he knows Duo's mind was lost in a more serious time and place. He doesn't point it out because he understands it would be embarrassing.

"Yeah." He scratches the back of his neck and is grateful no one questions the lie, even if it might be obvious. The guys know better than to pry; none of them like exposing their emotions to the group, everyone has their own _person_ within the unit that they confide in – one person that knows them better than all the others.

With their lunch break over they head outside and suit up for their patrol duty.

* * *

 **Let me know what you think! The more excited you guys are, the more excited I get and it really helps.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note:**

 **I meant to ask in my previous AN (and forgot, of course) if you guys prefer I continue responding to reviews at the start of the chapter, or if I should reply through PM? I like the "clean" look of not having a bunch of replies at the top of the page and I can get you a reply quicker because it doesn't depend on when the next chapter comes out. However, I don't want to bother anyone, if people don't like getting PM's…**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Three**_

Heero is quick to adapt to the military routine again and soon feels at home at the new base. It is a much appreciated upgrade from Camp Delaram and, like all the others, he doesn't think twice about the fact that Sharana is located in a more dangerous part of the country.

Camp Sharana is situated in the Pakita province, close to the Duran-line border between Afghanistan and Pakistan. Border conflicts between the Pakistani and Afghani armies are common, which also arouses unrest in the Pashtun tribes. Throwing in a foreign military force from the West doesn't help calm things down. Territorial disputes threaten local villages. Routinely patrols take the units through the nearby settlements where they try to weed out manifestations of the Taliban that likes to recruit in the area.

"Never a dull moment at Camp Sharana," is the motto. If they aren't chasing down insurgents on patrol or protecting the perimeter from their perch in the watchtowers, they have their drills and rotating chores. In their down-time the units get competitive playing football in the dirt lot behind the barracks, or shooting hoops in the recreation hall, and everyone gets antsy when it's their turn in the "internet café", from where they can contact their families.

Duo loves life on base, in particular now that he has his BSF at his side again. He hates the daily grind of his life at home, which lacks all excitement. He needs the thrill and he needs his brothers; kindred spirits who _get_ him. At home, in spite of his love for barbeque ribs, air-conditioning and his memory foam mattress, he feels misunderstood and restless. Everyone here feels the same and everyone knows it doesn't mean that they love their family any less because they choose to be on the other side of the world, risking their lives for a war that shouldn't even be theirs. Duo is a third generation Marine and still his mother and sister don't understand why he wouldn't rather be home with them – why he was excited to go back on tour and why he skipped his last leave.

There was only one thing about life on base that could become too much to handle.

Stationed at Camp Sharana were eighty-five men and only seven women and on top of that the anti-fraternization laws prohibited sexual relationships. Exposed to a 24/7 adrenaline high, there was a lot of bottled-up sexual tension that needed a relief when there wasn't one. Somehow, it was less weird jerking off in his top bunk back at Camp Deleram, in the tent that he shared with twenty-three other soldiers, than it was in his private barrack with Heero. And Heero felt the same way. They allotted each other some regular alone-time to solve their recurring, physical problem but it was an imperfect agreement as Duo had trouble falling asleep at night after waking up with a hard-on.

One day, while running drills in his full chemical gear, he has a brilliant idea.

Duo always has his best ideas whenever he's having a heatstroke…

After a short break, they suit up again and take two Humvees and a truck three klicks North, chasing down intel that the Taliban has supplied weapons to villagers to raid a smaller settlement for their stored food. Freak desert floods had ruined most of last year's crops in the area: because the ground is so dry, it doesn't absorb rain water well, so the rare, heavy rainfall creates instant rivers that wash away the seedling plants.

They systematically check all the baked mud homes and wooden sheds but come up empty. Follander uses the opportunity to bargain with a villager at the bazaar, exchanging a sleeve of cigarettes for a bottle of vodka that he smuggles back onto base. Alcohol is strictly prohibited on base, but that has never stopped Follander. While everyone considers the mission a bust, the Private couldn't be happier. He won't even drink it himself, instead, he'll trade it for favors, so the way he sees it, he just bought his way out of a month's worth of doing ammo inventory.

They pile back into their vehicles and head back to camp, staying off the roads, where insurgents like to plant IED's. It's a bumpy ride and Duo and Heero, seated in the back of the lead Humvee, get thrown around and Duo even bumps his head against the roof of the car a couple of times, making the Corporal laugh.

When they park back inside the perimeter of Camp Sharana, Duo takes off his helmet and rubs the top of his head, feeling a bump that is painful to the touch. He makes exaggerated moans and groans, fishing for a little sympathy. He gets smacked on the back of the head instead.

"Shut it, Princess," Heero snaps comically. "They don't give out Purple Hearts for booboos."

Once they've unloaded their gear and locked everything away in the storage building, their Sergeant dismisses them for the night and they all but run for the showers, elbowing each other out of the way.

Duo and Heero pick shower heads next to each other again. The entire unit banters back and forth as they wash the sweat and dust off their bodies. Sand has a way of getting everywhere. Chapple swats Lindsey's soap right out of his hand and everyone's laughter echoes off the tiled walls at the trope and the way Lindsey awkwardly bends down to pick it up, as if he actually doesn't trust them not to molest him.

"I wouldn't sweat it, Fidget," Chapple mocks, "I think I speak for all of us when I say we'd rather fuck a hole in the ground than your asshole."

"I'm not so sure about Maxwell though," Follander interjects.

Duo quirks an eyebrow, waiting for him to elaborate.

"You said thanks-but-no-thanks to your RNR, didn't you? Seven months is a long time and we're only halfway."

"Still wouldn't stick my dick up his ass," Duo quips, causing laughter, which only gets louder when he adds: "Might make him suck me off for a bit though."

Lindsey grimaces. He is not enjoying always being the butt of these kinds of jokes, but as the Benjamin of the group, the bottom is his assigned place in the hierarchy. But being the youngest has its benefits; if shit hits the fan, all the older boys will fiercely protect him, feeling like it's their responsibility as his big brothers.

Everyone retreats to their own barracks. Duo and Heero walk in silence under the starry sky to their sunbaked hut in the back. The smaller barracks are typically reserved for the Sergeants, but since the camp is understaffed, they got lucky.

Duo really has to put his weight into it to close the door, which hangs crooked off its hinges. Then he lays down in his cot, on top of his sheets and stares up at the cracked ceiling. He is not yet tired enough to sleep, but it's nice to rest and not talk and just be alone with his thoughts. Heero is reading a book by the single light on the table between their beds. Most soldiers work their way through the collection of DVD's in the TV corner at the Rec Hall, starting with the action flicks that glorify their brand of violence, until they have no choice but to watch the rom-coms as well. Not Heero; he reads. He teaches himself a new language each tour. Last tour it was Chinese, Arabic before that – they didn't know each other then - and he is working on his French right now.

Duo cocks his head to the side and watches his friend for the moment. He looks soft and pretty in the orange glow of the light. The shaved sides of his head show off his small, delicate ears and his profile against the dark wall behind him highlights his pointed nose and full lips. That's the kind of shit you start to notice after a seven-month-dry-spell. Duo would be lying if he denied having sexual fantasies about his friend: just brief flashes of images, that he puts an end to as soon as he notices what his filthy brain is doing.

He probably should have taken his leave. On a twelve- to fourteen-month tour, the soldiers get a two week leave, but scheduling dictates when they are supposed to take that leave and Duo's time-frame for leave came up early in the tour. They were still stationed at Camp Delaram at the time and everyone thought he was crazy for not taking it. It was right around Christmas time too. But for Duo, war was the perfect excuse to miss out on awkward Christmas dinners with his dad and granddad, who boasted about having been better Marines than him in every sense of the word, because they propelled themselves up the ladder with one promotion after another, while Duo was still "a mere Lance Corporal". Not even the promise of his girlfriend waiting for him could sway him to face his father and grandfather.

As much of an issue Duo has with authority figures because of his strained relationship with his dad, the only thing he can imagine being worse than following someone's orders, is being the one giving the orders. He has no ambition of becoming a Sergeant and leading his own unit. He likes the equality that he has within his current unit. The men range from Privates to Corporals, but none of them ever pull rank on each other.

Heero was promoted to Corporal at the end of their last tour, meaning the soldier outranks Duo, but it has never affected their friendship.

"You're staring," Heero notes.

Duo is a little surprised the man noticed; as far as he could tell, his blue gaze never drifted away from the pages of the book that he held closely in front of his nose. "I'm _thinking_ ," he amends.

"Bout what?" Heero is only half paying attention.

"About how I'm gonna deal with being so fucking horny all the time."

Heero lowers the book down into his lap and oddly stares at him. "Did the thought of Lindsey sucking your dick get you all riled up or something?"

"Nah. I just wanna be able to jerk off whenever I feel like it. Like right now. I wanna jerk off right now, but you're here. Fucking reading."

"Jerk off," Heero encourages with a shrug. "I don't care. You think I didn't hear you back in Delaram? Your bed was right on top of mine. Some nights the bunk shook." He lets out a chuckle.

"Yeah, but it's weirder now. Now that it's just the two of us in here."

"Hn." He raises his book again and teases dryly: "You need a bigger audience or something?"

"Not that. There was more anonymity back there. Besides, I've never heard you jerk off. There's an imbalance in the Force."

"Quote the Prequels and Medina will kill you," the other retorts offhandedly. It was one of the running gags in the unit. "He'll know somehow."

"But you agree that it's weird right? That's why you don't jerk off around me either."

"We have a system," Heero points out. "It works just fine." He is not being completely honest, Duo can tell. Heero may be the perfect soldier, but even he is not impervious to waking up with a woody in the middle of the night.

"I know what we should do." Duo sits upright in his bed and boldly decides to introduce the plan he came up with while running drills earlier that day. "Exposure therapy."

Heero closes the book with a sigh and turns to face him only to amuse him. "This should be good." He knows Duo's mother is a shrink and Duo has a way of bringing up random therapies as a contrived solution to imaged problems.

"So, like, in exposure therapy, you engage in the activity that frightens you in the most extreme way, so the lesser variations of it that you encounter in your daily life don't bother you anymore."

"And how – pray tell – does that translate to your current predicament?" He challenges with the quirk of an eyebrow.

"We should jerk off together," he states point blank and stares at Heero seriously, waiting for a response. It doesn't occur to him that he has said something crazy.

The other lets out a short laugh and opens his book again. "No."

"No?"

"Hell no."

* * *

 **How long do you think Heero's resolve will last? (or rather: mine) XP**


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's note:**

 **I have no self-control (that's all I'll say with regards to this chapter XD)**

 **On a different note: at least where this story is concerned, I will be replying to reviews through PM's from now on, to see how that works. Obviously, that means I can't reply if you leave a review without logging in. If you don't want a PM, just let me know you don't need a response, or don't log in. I don't want to be a bother to anyone. I won't be replying to reviews from before this point, because you didn't give "permission" for that, but if you'll leave a review for this chapter I'll touch on your previous review and answer any questions you might have had.**

 **I will say: Thank you! To everyone reading and especially to the readers who left a review! Thank you for your support, even when I had to take a bit of a step back from fanfiction. It means a lot to me that you are still sticking with my stories. I'm very excited about the reaction to "Ascendant But Obsequious" and I'm excited about how this story is going as well. It is so much easier to write after seeing the responses from you guys and that makes it a lot of fun for me again and I hope it's still a fun read for you kind folks.**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Four**_

The boys are watching "When Harry Met Sally", six of them crowding on the couch and a dozen more of them had brought in plastic chairs from the mess hall. Duo is playing Foosball with Follander in the back, getting competitive as they keep evening out the score. Duo and a couple of the guys are supposed to have internet privileges for the evening, but the connection failed and the techs are working to get everything back online. That is where Heero is, helping them figure out the problem and how to fix it. He studied Computer Engineering before dropping out a few months shy of graduation to enlist.

"I scored a bottle of gin at the bazaar today," the Private informs him, probably just trying to distract him from his game with chatter. "Want some?"

"A mediocre buzz isn't worth doing your scut work. It's not worth the hangover either." Duo grins up at him when he manages to score a point. "If the Staff every catches you with that stuff, he's gonna send you back to Delaram to shovel out the shit-holes." Literal shit-holes.

"Nah, he'd miss me."

"He'd be the only one."

In the end Follander beats him at Foosball, which agitates the Lance Corporal a little. Rather than draping himself over the back of the couch to watch the end of the movie with the rest, he heads outside and goes to the "internet café", which is one of the few tents on the lot. A tent can be sealed better than the stone buildings, which protects the computers from the sand that is constantly blowing around.

He pushes the flap to the side and steps in. Most of the computers are unoccupied but the two techs that are still there look up at him.

"Hey, we just fixed the router problems," declares one. "It was your turn tonight, right? Have at it." He nods at one of the empty seats in front of the stand-by computers.

He should call his girlfriend, but he really doesn't want to. He has mostly been avoiding contacting her this tour. She was the rebound-girl that never left and he had always been fine with that. He's hardly ever home anyway, so he doesn't mind. It's actually kind of convenient that she pays half the rent and keeps the apartment maintained, but that is a horrible reason to stay in a relationship. He was considering breaking up with her right when he got the call that the unit was being deployed again and it didn't feel like the right time, and he definitely can't end things over the phone either.

He knows he has an uncomfortable conversation waiting for him as soon as he gets back home.

"No, it's fine," he replies, "was just gonna surf the web a little, watch Victoria Secret shows on Youtube and shit. Now I'm ready for bed." He flashes a grin. They aren't allowed to use their time in the internet café to watch porn, so a little creativity and out-of-the-box thinking is required to gather some visuals to masturbate to later. "Did Yuy say where he was going?"

"To bed, I think."

"Alright. See ya guys." He steps out of the tent with a halfhearted wave.

With his hands in the pockets of his camo trousers he walks to the barracks. As he passes the Rec Hall, he hears the guys laughing and walking by the Sergeants' offices it is apparent they are having a fun night too, playing poker. It had been a stressful day and everyone enjoys the opportunity to unwind. They had gotten shot at during patrol, navigating through the narrow dirt streets of a village. Once they had cornered their attackers on the rooftops from where they were sniping at them, they discovered they were dealing with young kids armed with AK-47's. Encountering child soldiers stopped being a shock to them a long time ago, but it doesn't leave Duo unaffected, having to pry an assault rifle out of the hands of a ten-year-old and thinking about how close he had come to shooting the kid in self-defense. Thankfully, there were no casualties or injuries on either side.

Never a dull moment at Camp Sharana.

He pushes the door to the barrack open and his greeting dies in his throat when the scene he has walked in on registers.

Heero quickly pulls the sheets into his lap to cover himself and cusses at Duo for barging in.

"Sorry," he offers sheepishly but his chuckle doesn't sound very apologetic.

"Jesus Christ," Heero grunts and he presses the heel of his palm into his groin. "Can you give me a minute?"

"Nope. Go right ahead and finish up though. _I don't care_ ," he says, mirroring what Heero had said to him a week earlier. He heads over to his bed.

"Goddammit, Maxwell." Heero gets up from his cot, bundling the sheets in front of him and he is about to leave to go search for some privacy elsewhere but Duo steps back in front of the door to block his way.

"You are not going to walk around the compound like that," he insists.

"Then _leave_."

"Look, Purple Heart, if getting walked in on doesn't cramp your style, you should be able to take care of business just fine with me here." He grabs his shoulders and steers him back to his cot where he sits him down.

Heero looks up at him and tries a glare on him to frighten him into leaving, but the soldier is unaware of how hopelessly unintimidating he looks with that flush to his cheeks, not to mention his pouty lips.

"In fact… I think I'm gonna join ya." Duo plops down right next to Heero and unceremoniously unzips his pants and fondles himself through his underwear. After the adrenaline-fueled day they have had, he has no trouble getting a hard-on. Being seated shoulder to shoulder with the other man doesn't affect him at all. Or maybe it does affect him, just not in a negative way. "I just watched Gisele strut her stuff," he lies.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Heero exclaims and he purposefully turns his head away when Duo pulls his erection out of his boxers.

Duo spits into his hand and wraps his fist around himself, moaning as he does. His palm is course, but the spit makes his strokes smoother and he expertly twists his wrist and focuses his fingers on the sensitive tip. He is not looking at Heero, not wanting to scare off his newfound bravery and shamelessness and instead stares down at himself. He rubs his thumb into the slit, making it wet with precome. "Ahh… feels good," he breathes, hoping to encourage Heero to follow his lead, trusting that would make it less awkward.

After a moment, he glances to the right and spots Heero's hand kneading the bulge in his lap through the dark green cloth that covers him. "You a shy boy, Purple Heart?"

They have seen each other naked countless of times and hard as well; that's just something that happens when you hit the showers right after getting back from a dangerous mission and no one gives anyone any grief about that. There is no reason for either of them to self-conscious about their bodies.

Heero responds to the challenge by pulling away the sheets, showing his unzipped trousers and the needy erection standing up straight in his lap. He envelops himself with his golden hand and that is when Duo tears his gaze away. Realizing that he wants to look, alerts him to the fact that he definitely shouldn't. He pointedly focuses on his own handiwork but when he catches the sound of Heero's first moan, his gaze drifts back to the other man's hand and then up to his face.

Heero has his eyes squeezed shut – trying to pretend he's alone even though he must feel Duo's shoulder against his and the warmth that radiates from the other body. He has his head tilted back and his lips slightly parted. His pretty face and the way he thoughtlessly licks his lips looks damn good to Duo after seven months. With a surge of blood flow his cock hardens even more and he clamps his fist around it tightly to feel it throb. He lets out a groan and Heero moans right after that and then bites down on that full, bottom lip, like he regrets making a sound.

None of it feels awkward or weird anymore, instead, Duo is more turned on that he has been in a long time. Having Heero right next to him adds to his rush. Even though he is watching him pump his cock, Heero isn't a man to Duo in the moment – let alone his friend and fellow soldier. He detaches himself from all of that, leaving Heero as just another person: a person of warm skin, soft lips and pleasant sounds. He studies him, enjoying the tension in his neck as he bares his throat, the focused frown to his brows and the way his bottom lip sometimes trembles when he's right on the edge but can't push himself over.

The other must have felt him stare, because he cracks his eyes open and looks straight back at him. He expects Heero to say something to convince him to stop looking at him, but he doesn't. They hold eye contact and the only sounds in the small space are their heavy breathing and the wet sound of their hands moving over their sensitive skin.

A thought pops up in Duo's head and rather than act on it, he just grins sloppily.

"…What?" Heero breathes.

He doesn't answer. He hesitates for a moment, but then he leans sideways and closes the limited distance between them. Their lips softly meet and it barely counts as a kiss. Duo inches back, only to gauge the other's reaction. The blue eyes are so clouded, he can't tell what Heero is thinking, or if he's even thinking anything at all as he is obviously closing in on his climax. He leans in again and this time he merges their mouths more deliberately and has his lips move against Heero's. It makes Duo lightheaded and tingly all over. He tentatively touches the tip of his tongue to Heero's parted lips, intending to deepen the kiss.

Heero suddenly jerks his head away and Duo is worried he has done something wrong, until he follows Heero's gaze down into the man's lap and sees that he is coming, spilling on his white nightshirt and his hand that is pumping up and down the length. The mouth Duo has just kissed is open in a silent moan.

Duo keeps his face close to Heero's, breathing in his scent, as he speeds up the pace of his own hand and wrings an orgasm out of himself. He lets out a deep, drawn-out moan close to Heero's ear. When he's spent, he tiredly rests his chin on Heero's shoulder and closes his eyes for a moment. He knows he is sporting a stupid smirk but he can't help it. He nearly topples over when the Corporal jumps up from the cot.

With his back turned to Duo, Heero zips his pants back up and reaches inside to adjust himself.

Duo can't even stand the thought of putting his clothes back on properly. His dick is way too sensitive in the aftermath of the release. He watches his friend as he takes off his soiled shirt and bundles it up in his hands. His movements look angry. "You okay, buddy?"

"Fine." Without ever facing his bunk-mate he steps into his military boots and walks out with the laces untied, announcing he is going to clean up.

Duo lets himself drop down in Heero's cot and takes a moment to catch his breath before he tucks himself back into his pants and follows Heero to the bath house with a towel draped around his neck. They are only allowed one shower per day, so he finds Heero standing at one of the sinks, still shirtless and with his pants and underwear pushed down to his thighs and he is washing himself with a wet washcloth. Normally, he would boldly take up a spot right next to the other, but they are the only ones there and with nineteen other, empty sinks available, it feels weird. So Duo picks a sink in the opposite row to clean himself. He keeps looking up in the mirror, watching Heero in the reflection, but Heero never looks up from his task, so he gives up on trying to make eye contact.

He hears Heero finish up and doesn't think the man is going to approach him, but he does. Heero leans his hip against the sink next to Duo's and folds his arms in front of his bare chest. Duo meets his gaze while he continues to rub himself down with his washcloth and gives him an expectant look as he waits for him to speak.

"We're never going to do that again," Heero asserts. "And we're never going to talk about it either."

Duo doesn't understand why Heero is so serious in the aftermath. The way he sees it, they were just having some fun. Duo is secure in his masculinity and his sexuality and is unbothered by what has happened between them. It was just a friend helping out a friend. But, he recognizes that he has crossed a line with his friend and he doesn't want to make things worse by trying to convince the other to lighten up. "… Okay," he says simply.

Heero gives a curt nod and then walks away.

* * *

 **Pfft, please. Heero may have self-control, but we've already established that I don't, so…**

 **So from now on, when you leave a signed-in review (and don't specify that you don't want a response), imma "slide into your PM's" :P**

* * *

 **.**

 _ **I have read and agree to the terms and conditions.**_ **[]**


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's note:**

 **I'm glad the prospect/threat of getting a PM didn't put people off from reviewing (I was worried about that for a bit).**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Five**_

They both sleep it off and everything is normal the next morning as they both pretend it never happened, which is how Heero wants it. Duo abides by his request. As nice as it was to have some actual person-to-person contact, he wasn't going to risk his friendship just to add a slight thrill to his masturbation routine. That wasn't the point of last night anyway, he had only intended to make it less awkward for them to be "in touch with their sexuality" around each other – Exposure Therapy and all - obviously that backfired and Duo knows better than to push it again.

Duo is suiting up, getting ready to run drills for the day. He's in his fatigues which feel cumbersome and sticky on his sweaty skin and he is standing under the absent mercy of the Afghani sun, packing up his backpack with stones, per his Staff Sergeant's orders. His entire unit is doing the same. Once they all have on their heavy backpacks, they palm their rifles and stand at attention, waiting for the Staff Sergeant to finish conferring with the Gunnery Sergeant who came walking up to him. Duo can't hear what the two men are saying, but his superiors shoot looks in his general direction and his worry only increases when he catches on they are actually looking at Heero.

"What the fuck is going on?" He mutters under his breath. He keeps staring straight ahead and moves his mouth as little as possible as he speaks, to avoid being reprimanded.

Heero doesn't reply, abiding by the instruction to "keep their damn mouth shut".

The Staff Sergeant nods at the Gunnery and then approaches his unit. "Ready, ladies?"

"Sir, yes Sir!" They bark in trained unison.

The Staff has them run along the brick wall that lines the compound and at random times he fires off his rifle just above their heads and shouts orders at them, making them drop to the ground and crawl, get in defensive formation or tend to a pretend injury of one of their comrades while providing cover fire.

The drills served a better purpose at Camp Delaram, where conditions were harsh but life was tedious. The only action they saw while stationed at Delaram, was the attack during which Heero got shot. At Sharana, they deal with insurgents on a daily basis, which effectively keeps them on their toes. But, as physically taxing as they are, Duo would rather run drills than have more time off. They had already watched all of the movies available on base and even the Foosball-table and basketball hoop were starting to lose their shine.

Heero is starting to return to his old self, from before getting wounded. He had had trouble keeping up with the unit for the past few months. Everyone, including Heero, had underestimated how detrimental his injury and the six weeks of mandatory rest and slow recovery had been on his stamina. He used to outrun them all, nowadays, everyone considers it huge progress that he is able to keep up with them; slowing inching his way back to the head of the pack. None of the guys would ever admit to it, but they are all relying on the Corporal, and the better he is doing, the more secure everyone feels.

After a second round along the outer wall, they are allowed to ditch their backpacks and the Staff has them doing jumping jacks, burpees, push-ups and sit-ups until he is satisfied that the entire unit is exhausted and then he has them take a knee and strip and reassemble their weapons, while timing them.

Duo's fingers are shaking. His body is completely depleted of energy and his vision is fuzzy, but that is the point of the exercise. If your rifle jams during a mission, you have to be able to clean it out and get it functioning again, regardless of the circumstances before, during or after that time. He blows sand off the magazine, about to click it into place, when Heero jumps up next to him – his rifle assembled and clutched perfectly straight at his side. It distracts him for a moment. It is an odd relief that Heero still makes the rest of them look like they don't know what the fuck they are doing. He inserts the magazine, cocks the weapon to check and then flicks the safety back on before straightening up himself.

One by one, the guys pop up from the ground and stand in line, waiting for the last to finish.

Lindsey is last. The stress of one after another of his unit beating him to it is getting to him and he fumbles with the parts. It is no mystery why he was awarded the nickname "Fidget". He gets up and shoots an apologetic look down the line of red, sweaty faces before he assumes position and gives salute.

"You owe me your congratulations, Private Lindsey," the Staff Sergeant bellows.

"Sir, I'm sure I do, but if you would please explain, Sir."

"You made me wait so long, I am now a _hundred_ years old."

"Sir, I apologize, Sir! Congratulations on your hundredth birthday, Sir."

Both Follander and Duo can't help but snicker.

"Everyone, turn around and take aim at the wall. Let's see which one of you ladies fucked up."

They all spin around on their heels, prop the stock of the rifle against their shoulder and take aim at the wall.

"Fire!"

The shots go off nearly simultaneously and Duo is pleased at the puff of dust and the brand new hole in the wall straight ahead of him. That wall sees a lot of action, both inside and out, and the running joke is that they mean to leave it about as impenetrable as Swiss cheese for the next battalion that gets stationed at FOB Sharana, after their tour ends.

At the far left of the line, someone curses under their breath as their rifle doesn't fire.

It's Lindsey.

The Staff Sergeant walks around them and steps up to the youngest soldier. He looks down at the ground at his feet and then back up. "Private Lindsey. Correct me if I'm wrong, but is that the firing pin of your rifle?"

Lindsey looks down and his face contorts. "Sir, you are correct, Sir. That is indeed the firing pin to my rifle, Sir."

"Now, in my many years' worth of experience with rifles – I am a _hundred_ years old, after all," the Staff mocks, "I have never known a rifle to fire without the firing pin."

The others chuckle. All but Heero.

The Staff chuckles. "You think that's funny, men?"

Everyone straightens their face and replies: "No, Sir!"

"Yuy sure didn't think it was funny," the Staff Sergeant continues, "You know why? Because if we were outside of these walls right now and Corporal Yuy had just run into the line of fire to protect our unit from the blast of a grenade, relying on Private Lindsey to provide cover fire… our Corporal would be well and truly dead right now."

Duo's heart sank. He certainly didn't think it was funny anymore.

"I'm sure Corporal Yuy would rather grow to be a hundred years old. Let's all grow a hundred years old while we wait for Private Lindsey to properly reassemble his weapon."

Lindsey understood his cue and kneeled down in the sand to start the process anew, being sure to blow the dust off all the parts before clicking them back into place and to not forget about the firing pin this time. After getting up he is instructed to fire at the wall again and thankfully the weapon fires without an issue.

"Good. Now, speaking of stupid things like forgetting firing pins and running into enemy fire to kick a grenade like it's a damn football…" The Staff wanders back to the center of the line and comes to stand a few feet in front of Heero. "Step forward, Corporal Yuy."

Duo swallows, watching his friend step out of the line. He wonders if the Staff Sergeant was seriously going to punish him for his actions. He knows the superior had been very stressed in the aftermath, when the decision fell to him to have Heero patched up – barely stabilized – and then have him flown across the world in the back of a Hercules to have his surgery at Bethesda, which was better equipped than the military's local trauma center. His dread worsens when the Gunnery Sergeant walks around them and comes to stand next to the Staff Sergeant, looking as serious and impossible to please as he always does.

"Corporal Yuy, should history repeat itself and you and your unit find yourself in similar circumstances as they did in Janabad, would you make the same, ill-advised decision to run _toward_ an armed grenade, beyond cover from gunfire?" The Staff challenged.

Heero doesn't hesitate. "Yes, I will, Sir. Any day of the week, Sir."

 _Smartass_ , Duo thinks to himself and he has to bite down on his lip to stop him from telling his friend to shut his trap.

"That's what I thought," the Staff replies, sounding displeased. "And I suppose you quite like the others calling you Purple Heart now? It has a nice ring to it."

"They can call me whatever they want, Sir."

"Hm." The Staff shares a look with the Gunnery. "What if they start calling you Silver Star from now on?"

Duo's eyes widen.

"… Sir?" Heero replies, sounding unsure of himself for the first time in the exchange.

The Gunnery Sergeant steps in and a rare smile appears on his weathered face. "Corporal Heero Yuy, I hereby inform you that you are being awarded The Silver Star Medal, for your heroism performed with distinction."

"Holy shit," Duo lets slip, only to be scolded by his Staff Sergeant.

"You defied instinct to protect yourself and instead showed incredible bravery, without a moment's hesitation, to save your men, and both Staff Sergeant Peacecraft and I wholeheartedly believe that you will do it all again, which is why we recommended you for the commendation."

Heero is momentarily dumbstruck. Even though he is definitely not the type of guy who joined the Marine Corps for titles and medals, even the down-to-earth Corporal was speechless at receiving the third highest commendation for bravery.

"The ceremony will be performed stateside, after our tour wraps up, so you can invite your mommy and make her proud," the Staff interjects with a teasing tone. "General Khushrenada himself will pin the medal on your uniform." He reaches out a hand to the Corporal. "Congratulations."

Heero shakes his hands and then the Gunnery's hand. "Thank you." He still sounds shell shocked.

It is taking all of Duo's willpower not to step out of line and hug his friend and keep quiet a squeal of excitement.

"At ease, soldiers."

Once they are dismissed and the two Sergeants have walked away, everyone crowds Heero, but Duo is the quickest to get to him and wraps his arms tightly around him. "Congratulations, you motherfucker," he mutters into Heero's collar.

They all take turns shaking his hand and patting his shoulder.

"Now I finally understand why you did something _that_ stupid," Follander speaks up. "For the damn bling!"

On the way to the Mess Hall for lunch, Duo easily drapes an arm over Heero's shoulders. Heero's body fits against his perfectly. He presses a kiss against the shaved side of his head, just above the shell of his ear, not even considering that the action might be weird after kissing his friend on the lips the night before. Heero is also unbothered by it, probably in a daze after receiving the news. Noticing the distant, disbelieving look in the blue eyes, Duo ruffles his hair until it messily falls forward into his face. "You okay, buddy?" He asks, keeping his voice softer so the others – walking ahead of them – won't butt in.

"Yeah… just… surprised."

Honestly, they could have known Heero would receive some kind of reward for his heroism, but neither of them ever concerned themselves with medals, ribbons, badges and promotions. Heero had been equally caught off guard when they had promoted him from Lance Corporal to Corporal.

In the Mess Hall, half of the unit conquers a table and the other half gets everyone their food. Heero quickly steers the conversation away from his Silver Star, feeling self-conscious about being put in the spotlight like that. He has no trouble changing the subject; the other guys know what he's doing, but they understand.

A few minutes later the rest of the unit returns with trays of food and drinks and plop down in the empty seats at the table, but Follander stands next to Heero, obviously hiding something behind his back.

Heero looks up at him with a sheepish grin, waiting for the joke.

"Since the ceremony will be performed stateside and we just can't wait to make this more awkward for you, I've decided we should have a little ceremony here." He scratches his throat and then continues on with a theatrical voice: "I present to you, The Silver Star. For showing the utmost _imbecility_ in combat and proving to be the most insane out of all us." He brings his hands forward and displays "The Silver Star": an asymmetrical star made of crumpled-up tin foil that he snatched from the kitchen staff.

Heero laughs and reactively shoots a look at Duo before cocking his head up at Follander again and he accepts the star from the Private.

Follander bends forward, curling himself over Heero to give him a hug. "I love ya, man. Thanks for saving our _be_ -hinds and making us all look bad in front of our superiors." He then takes a seat next to the Japanese-American.

The other soldiers catch on as well and news spread fast, so when Duo stands up and raises his plastic cup in a wordless toast, everyone in the Mess Hall follows suit and for a few seconds it is dead quiet in the hall. Duo smiles at the blush that creeps up to Heero's cheekbones. Everyone takes a drink in honor of his bravery and then it is back to business as usual.

* * *

 **Next chapter is going to delve a little deeper in how Heero earned that Silver Star #flashback**

 **.**

 **I got a question about the ranks so I want to avoid confusion if it's unclear to more readers. I thought I had slipped in Duo's and Heero's ranks often enough and that the basic order of ranks is pretty much common knowledge; enough at least to understand the story. Especially since the ranks don't really matter within the frame of the story. But, to clarify, this is what has been established:**

 **General (Khushrenada)  
Gunnery Sergeant  
Staff Sergeant (Peacecraft)  
Corporal (Heero)  
Lance Corporal (Duo)  
Private First Class (Chapple)  
Private (Follander, Lindsey)**

 **Not everyone's rank is mentioned because it's irrelevant.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's note:**

 **Uhhh... Did you know a polar bear's hairs aren't actually white, but transparant?**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Six**_

They walk alongside the string of Humvees and two trucks, following the road at a cautious speed. Duo and Heero are at the front right of the caravan, scouring the ground, and with their rifles at their sides. The sun is setting and the low rays of sunlight cast a dark shadow behind every rock and mound, that makes it look like more than it is. The air is starting to cool as their spot on the Earth turns away from the sun, but heat still radiates from the ground.

The road connects Ghazi in the North West with Shakin in the South East, at the Afghan-Pakistani border. Dotted along the road are several smaller settlements, including the town of Sharan mid-way and FOB Sharana not far from there. Yesterday, a company of traders was traveling from Sharan to Ghazi, to make money selling their handwoven tapestries and beaded jewelry at the large bazaar in the city this weekend. They had just continued on with their journey after a brief rest stop by lake Bande Sardeh, when one of their Jeeps ran over an IED. Four of the travelers were killed and six more were severely wounded. That bomb wasn't meant for them, that bomb was meant for the military force that the Taliban means to drive from the area, unaware that all they've accomplished was force the military to travel off-road whenever possible.

They search the road for more planted explosives, committed to preventing more casualties, even if the casualties aren't from "their side".

Duo is nervous, walking ten steps behind Heero. The sun is setting in the West and the bright light in their faces makes it hard to focus while they're squinting to protect their eyes. IED's scare Duo more than anything, because he's seen the aftermath too many times and these are the kind of gruesome sights that PTSD is made of.

They had passed the site where the travelers ran into the explosive an hour earlier. There was a crater in the road. The sand was still stained red and the ground was scattered with the trinkets that they meant to sell. Duo had picked up a bracelet of black beads that had survived the blast and put it in his pocket, since it seemed disrespectful to leave it there amidst the destruction, as if it is worthless.

They follow the road for hours, turning on the floodlights mounted on the roofs of the Humvee's to light their search as they continue tirelessly. They clear a long stretch of road and mark the point where they make a U-turn to go back to base, so the other patrol party that goes out tomorrow can start where they left off. The unit piles into the vehicles and they roll through the front gate of Camp Sharana at 2 in the morning, when the desert is actually very cold. Thankfully, they still have their shower-privileges for the day and the hot water is a blessing on their chilled bodies and exhausted muscles.

Everyone is quiet. It has been a strange day that has left them on edge.

Standing naked next to Heero again, Duo's gaze slips down to his scars. Death and danger are always close, but he used to be able to forget that, losing himself to the thrill, like he is in the comfort of his own home, playing a first-person-shooter video game. Not anymore. Duo has been witness to people dying before – at home and at war – but there was something about his "BSF" getting wounded and nearly dying that really hammers in how mortal they all are. Maybe because Heero is supposed to be the best of them – and he is, but apparently "best" doesn't mean "safe". No matter how good they are, how hard they train, it could still all end in a split second.

It doesn't seem like a good plan to make your closest relationships with people who could be taken from you so easily. For the first time in three tours, Duo feels vulnerable. He's not afraid of getting shot or being blown up, he's afraid of losing his men. And he is most afraid of losing Heero, after he almost did. He didn't like it at all that Heero was walking in front all day on patrol. Duo was watching Heero's feet more than his own.

"You okay?" Heero simply asks as they are walking back to their barracks, after splitting off from the rest of the group.

"This day has me all fucked up," he admits. The red sand was more confrontational than he expected.

Once they are in their barracks, Duo uses his weight to properly close the door and Heero closes the shutters on the window.

Duo seats himself on the edge of his cot and plays with the bracelet that he pulls from the pocket of his trousers and he watches Heero settle in his bed. Heero's eyes are black like the beads in the dim light.

"Did you find that today?"

Duo nods.

"For your collection?"

"Yeah." He bends forward and pulls a box out from underneath his bed, which is stuffed with random items. Villagers give them stuff all the time; random things, anything they can spare, to show their gratitude for the protection they offer – to the best of their abilities. Duo can never refuse, he is always grateful whenever any of the locals show them that not all of them hate them and want them gone. It makes him feel better about the assignment. It lets him pretend that the militaries intentions are more pure than they probably are. He adds the bracelet to the collection of other jewelry, buttons, wood carvings and patches of fabric.

The most treasured additions are the drawings the little kids make him, with the pens that he steals from the supply office and hands out to them. They draw him pictures of their life; their family, their house, sometimes just a goat, or the silhouette of the mountain range at the horizon, with a scratchy ball above it that is supposed to be the sun.

After he stuffs it back under his bed, they both get ready for sleep and they each take a moment to themselves to wind down and relax before they decide to switch off the light. Duo listens to music on his MP3 – songs he's long gotten sick of, but it's all he has - while Heero reads his book, mouthing along with the French phrases. Duo lies on his side and watches his friend, who seems unaware of his spectator. Heero is such an amazing person, it is hard not to look at him; it is hard not to marvel. Nowadays, every time he looks at the man, he feels overwhelmed with gratitude and happiness.

 _He's still here._

After lights-out, he is haunted by a dream that has become too familiar to him and the horror of it is given extra power with the fresh memories from the sights that he has seen earlier today.

The red sand.

Heero lying in the red sand.

Duo sees the red mist around the final insurgents head as he takes his shot and the rapid noise of gunfire comes to a sudden stop and in the silence he hears his wounded friend moan and whine. He drops down on his knees in the red sand and digs his hand into Heero's abdomen, applying pressure to the bleeding wound. The pained cry that his friend lets out cuts through him, but he has to try his best to keep the pressure on, until their medic scrambles towards them and pulls bandages and pads out of his kit. The entire unit surrounds them, becoming increasingly frantic as the seriousness of the Corporal's injuries dawns on them. Lindsey is the first to say it, with a face paper-white: "He's not gonna make it."

"Shut up!" Duo bites, glaring at him over his shoulder before looking back at Heero and meeting his pale-blue eyes square on. "You're going to be _fine_ ," he asserts, because he needs it to be true.

"That's a lot of blood," Follander joins in and with a panic he states their dire situation, as if it wasn't readily apparent. "We're four klicks out and the Jeep's completely shot up!"

"Call in the MEDEVAC!" Duo orders. Their sergeant isn't with them and with Heero incapacitated, the Lance Corporal has become the highest ranking soldier in their unit and it is up to him to take charge – in the moment when he feels the least capable of taking charge.

Follander nods and plucks the radio out of the Jeep to call for help.

Heero never stops looking at Duo. The color is draining from his face. There is tension in his jaw and neck as he has to force his body to keep breathing. They don't know it yet, but the bullet that hit him in the shoulder split apart on his collar bone and a shard punctured his lung, causing it to collapse. The medic catches on and gets Duo to help him rid Heero of his vest. Duo stares at the red-rimmed holes in the Kevlar, realizing those weren't AK47's taking shots at them, but rifles of a much higher caliber and he feels angry, scared and all the more helpless. In the meantime, the medic hoists up Heero's shirt and stabs a tube into his right lung. Heero's chest expands as he sucks in his first, deep breath.

Duo tears his gaze away from the useless vest when he feels Heero's hand claps his arm. He looks into his eyes. The man can breathe better now, but he is still losing a lot of blood. "MEDEVAC is on its way," he tells him, although he is not sure if Heero can even hear him, given the distant look in his blue eyes. "It's gonna be here any minute. Their gonna fly you to the trauma center at Camp Sharana, lucky bastard." He tries a grin, wanting to be as reassuring as possible, but he is failing miserably. He knows, as well as Heero, that even the trauma center might not be equipped to treat injuries this severe.

The hand on his arm grows weak, until eventually it falls to the red sand.

"Hang in there, Rookie Four," Duo urges, his panic is becoming evident in his voice.

"Where is that fucking chopper?" Follander demands, throwing his gaze up to the sky and his hysteria doesn't help the Lance Corporal to keep his cool.

Duo feels his lower lip quiver and he focuses on his anger rather than his fear and distress. "Don't you fucking die on me, Yuy. Mister Gotta-Be-The-Goddamn-Hero! Whose gonna keep me alive and _sane_ if you aren't around?"

Heero's expression is calm. He says: "It's okay."

"You're damn right you'll be okay!" Duo snaps back at him, misunderstanding what he is trying to say.

"No…" Limp fingers brush by Duo's arm but he can't get a hold of him. "It's okay… You'll be okay."

It knocks the breath out of Duo. Heero is telling him to accept the inevitable. While he is dying, he's trying to reassure his friend that he can go on without him.

At that point, the dream diverts from the memory.

What really happened was that Heero passed out from blood loss, while they heard the rumble of the helicopter in the distance. They loaded him up and the unit was left behind in the desert to wait for another chopper to come extract them, staring at the MEDEVAC heli that became smaller and smaller until they could no longer see nor hear it. The unit was flown back to Delaram and by the time Duo and his men had thrown enough of a scene to convince the Gunnery Sergeant to let them visit Heero at the trauma center at Sharana, they were informed by the Staff that Heero was already on the Hercules, flying back to the States – having to endure a fifteen hour flight in the back of a military cargo plane while barely stable. It took two weeks for word to get back to them that he hadn't only survived the flight, but the surgery as well.

In the dream, the red sand becomes quick sand and Heero is sinking into it. He tries to hold on to Duo, but his grips is too weak. Duo grabs the man's arm, but he can't pull him up and he watches his friend get swallowed up by the red sand and he loses his hold on him. The last thing he sees are pale fingers, clawing through the sand, until they, too, disappear.

"Heero!" He screams and he starts digging, scooping away the sand, but it never makes a difference. He can't reach him. He can't find him! He looks around himself, begging his unit to help, but they aren't there with him anymore. Duo is all alone in a desert of red sand. He doesn't give up, he keeps digging.

"Heero!"

"Duo, be quiet," someone hisses and hands take hold of his shoulders, trying to immobilize him.

Duo jabs his elbow at whoever it is that is trying to stop him from saving his friend.

"Ow! Motherfuck- _Duo_!"

His body gets shaken violently and he opens his eyes – having never realized that he had closed them. He had been lost in his dream and it had become his reality. He wakes up to himself sitting on his knees on his cot in the barrack he shares with Heero. He had not been digging at the red sand, but at the sheets that were pooled into his lap instead. And the person that had been trying to stop him was Heero himself. Duo is panting from the exertion. He has had this nightmare before, but it had never turned into such a night-terror that he was actually acting it out.

The single light is switched on and Heero is cursing under his breath. Duo looks back at him and his heart sinks when he notices the dark blood gushing from Heero's nose, trailing down over his lips and chin and down his throat. Duo did that. His own elbow still aches from it.

"Jesus- Shit, Heero. I'm sorry." He stumbles upright, nearly falling to his face as his feet get tangled up in the sheets. He wants to help, although he doesn't know how – a recurring theme.

Heero backs away from him and holds up a hand to keep him at bay. "It's okay."

Duo shivers. The memories and his dream are still too fresh for that simple phrase to not affect him.

Heero lifts up the hem of his shirt to wipe away the blood, wiping roughly at his neck, chin and mouth, but carefully dabbing at his sore nose.

"Did I break it?"

"If you did, you'd know it," Heero snaps. "After you woke up from your coma."

The joke relieves Duo, even though it's clear Heero is still angry with him.

When he has cleaned himself as well as he can, using only his shirt, Heero finally throws his gaze up at his friend. "You were going to wake up the entire camp."

"I'm sorry, I was having a nightmare."

"Duh, Captain Obvious."

Duo grins. "Thanks for the promotion." Captain was quite a step-up from Lance Corporal.

Heero sighs and it's clear he's fighting a smile. He sits back down on the edge of his cot and Duo follows his lead. Now that Duo has calmed down, Heero is more sympathetic. He doesn't say or ask anything; he doesn't need to, he already knows everything and he understands and the look in his eyes is more calming to Duo than his words could ever be.

They maintain eye-contact for a minute or two, while Duo focuses on his breathing. Heero lets him use him as an anchor and it helps. Soon, he is back to his old self again, but he doesn't feel like joking around. He states a painful truth: "I'd be a wreck out here without you."

Heero offers his a smile. "You'd be okay."

He shakes his head. He hates that Heero won't just accept his admission. Heero didn't see him during those two weeks, when Duo honestly thought that his friend had died. He had come close to quitting the Corps. He had been angry at everyone and everything, the useless Kevlar vests most of all. He'd been a pain in the ass and had suffered several full blown panic attacks, causing the Staff to pull him off from patrol duty. No one ever gave him shit about how he was dealing with it though – no matter how badly he was coping. Everyone understood. Duo and Heero were a unit _within_ the unit. Duo was nothing more than a half to a whole. "No, I wouldn't be."

"Well, you'll never have to find out."

"You're damn right. Next time, I'm gonna beat you to that grenade." He expects his comment to make Heero smile, but Heero cocks his head and purses his lips instead.

After a moment, he counters: "What makes you think I'd be any less of a mess without you?"

He doesn't answer. He doesn't have an answer; it had been a mistake to think Heero didn't feel the same kind of unity and dependency. They didn't just keep each other safe, they kept each other sane too – some days, that was more valuable than anything. But it was easy to forget that war took the same toll on Heero as it did on everyone else, because he hides it more elegantly than the rest of them. "You're my better half, man," Duo says. It's not the first time he has said it, but it feels like a first time anyway, because there is a new layer to it that he hasn't felt before.

This is what makes Heero smile. He doesn't say anything at first. He settles in his cot, pulling his sheets up and he turns his body away from Duo. "Go to sleep, pussy."

Duo grins and switches off the light and crawls back into bed as well.

* * *

 **I know, I know… there'll be smut next time, I promise!**

 **The people shall have smut! I declare it so.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's note:**

 **Nothing to see here, children!**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Seven**_

At the end of another adrenaline-fueled day, Duo can't wind down. Every nerve ending is still alight, he is hyper-aware of his body and his surroundings and how the two interact. He lies in his cot and feels the coversheets move on top of him with his every breath. The air is cool on his cheeks, especially in contrast to his heated skin. The legs of his boxers have ridden up and the folds are uncomfortable against the back of his thighs. When he moves to smooth out his clothing, the canvas of the cot feels coarse and scratches at him. He prefers to sleep on top of one of his blankets, to prevent the discomfort of lying directly on top of the canvas material, but the desert nights are deceptively cool and some nights he needs both blankets that he is allotted to keep himself warm.

After adjusting his underwear, he lies still, with his arms straight down his sides. He drums his fingers against his outer thighs, mimicking the bass-line of a song he has been yearning to listen to, but didn't think to upload onto his MP3 before being deployed. He is not even sure he remembers it correctly and there is a rattle in the constant hum of the generator of the maintenance building that their barrack is directly behind that distracts him from the rhythm of the half-remembered song.

Heero's breathing also has a different cadence to it. He is dreaming, Duo can tell. His breath picks up at times and sometimes he makes a small sound, like a half-hearted grunt. He's turned over in his bed three times in the past ten minutes. Usually he sleeps so soundlessly and completely still that Duo has actually gotten out of bed and checked for a pulse on a couple of nights.

The sheets make more sounds as Heero moves underneath them again. Duo turns his head to look, but the light coming in through the cracks between the shutters is so dim that he can barely distinguish the outline of Heero's body in his bed and he can't even tell if the man is facing him or the wall, or if he's on his back or on his stomach.

Duo had been on the phone with his girlfriend for fifteen minutes that night. He had meant to avoid speaking to her and calling his mom instead, but he would get into trouble if he did. If he ignored Hilde any longer, she'd get him wrapped up in a conversation that he didn't want to have over the phone. When they were done catching up, she adopted a teasing tone of voice and asked him if he missed her; if he missed kissing her, if he missed fucking her. It evolved into one-sided phone-sex – Duo couldn't exactly say much with his Staff Sergeant sitting right next to him, making a call to his sister. Hilde had gotten him all riled up, which was the last thing he needed after taking shots from a sniper earlier that day.

His erection tents the sheets. The fabric of his boxers is pulled taut against the sensitive head and it's uncomfortable. He tries to will it away, summoning thoughts of his grandmother – may she rest in peace – and running through protocols in his head. The effect of his efforts is negligible.

He knows he will instantly feel better if he can just wring an orgasm out of himself. The release will relax him and exhaust his body in the way it needs to be able to sleep right now. But if jerking off in Heero's presence was odd before, it is even more loaded after "The Incident That Must Never Be Spoken Of". They have both honored Heero's wishes and never mentioned what happened, let alone acted on it. However, unbeknownst to his BSF, Duo has been thinking about it more often than he knows he should.

As he lies in his cot, hard and needy, with his girlfriend on the other side of the world, it are not Hilde's lips that he is thinking about. He is thinking about Heero. It has been weeks since that kiss, but the memory is so clear that Duo's lips tingle every time he thinks about it. He remembers the slight pressure of Heero's soft lips pressed against his, following his lead as Duo directed them through a brief, open-mouthed kiss. He remembers Heero breathing harshly through his nose; the hot breath sweeping across Duo's face. He remembers the dirty sounds of their slick hands pleasuring themselves, matching the other's pace.

Duo doesn't know what it means. He is not even sure if it means anything. After eight months of deployment, everything is seen from a different perspective. The difference between home and base is never greater than it is heading towards the last third of tour. His girlfriend is so far away, that she doesn't even seem real to him anymore – she is no more real to him than the characters in the movies that they watch to kill the time, whenever they are not out killing people.

Heero is real. And he's right there. Duo's lazy imagination runs with it.

Unable to resist, he pulls the elastic band of his boxers down, trusting that Heero is still fast asleep. The man is making small sounds that fuel Duo's lust. He takes his erection into his hand and bites back a sound of his own. His other hand pushes his shirt up to his collarbone and caresses his torso. With a delicate touch he moves the foreskin up and down the head a couple of times before he brings up his hands and spits into his palm. He wiggles his fingers to make sure they are all wet and then he reached underneath the blanket again. A low groan vibrates in the back of his throat and he tenses up. Frozen, he listens and is relieved that Heero is still lost in his restless dream.

The tight fist around his shaft feels better than anything he can imagine this far into his tour. He should just hurry up and get it over with as quickly as possible, but he can't risk leaving himself dissatisfied. What would be the point of the taking the risk if he did? With his left hand he cups his balls, massaging them. The index finger of his right hand rubs into the slit at the tip of his erection and he moans again. His mouth is open in short pants and he darts his tongue out as he pictures himself sitting next to Heero again and getting another chance to deepen that kiss. His lips felt so good, but he had wanted more. He had wanted to taste him. He still wants to.

Even in his fantasy, Heero rejects him, tilting his head back so his lips are out of reach.

"Nnn… Let me kiss you… Please, please, I wanna kiss you so bad," Duo breathes. Even his whisper sounds too loud, as do his heaving breaths and the rustling of the sheets in time with his strokes.

Suddenly, he becomes aware of how quiet it is. The generator has shut off and Heero is no longer grunting and shifting.

Duo swallows audibly and cocks his head to the side, but it's still too dark for him to see anything. He can't tell if Heero is awake or has slipped into a dreamless sleep. Whatever the case, it's too late for him to stop what he's doing and if Heero is awake and has any mercy, he'll pretend he never heard a thing. Duo waits a moment, counting his heartbeats and then continues. Now that it is so quiet in the barracks, every sound he makes seems deafening, but he can't stop himself from chasing his release; he needs it. He pulls the blanket off himself, so at least the fabric won't rustle the way it had. It's cold, but the cool air actually feels nice against his heated skin. In the darkness, he doesn't have to worry about his privacy, even if Heero is awake. Besides, nothing he hadn't seen before.

He rushes himself towards an orgasm and succeeds in keeping breathless curses from spilling from his mouth. For a minute, all he hears is blood rushing in his ears, until Heero grunts again and Duo notices that it is different from before. Duo stops the movement of his hand, holding his erection tightly by the base. It twitches as he keeps himself on the edge. He hears sheets rustling in that tell-tale way, but he knows it's not him.

Heero's breaths are quick and sharp and he lets out another sound: the softest moan.

Duo groans in response, oddly excited by the idea that Heero waking up to catch his friend jerking off actually turned him on.

Duo wishes he could watch the other, but it's too dark and he knows he will ruin the moment if he switches on the light. He joins in again, pumping his fist up and down, but making sure to stay his orgasm so he can enjoy the moment longer. He lets moans and groans tumble freely from his lips and it encourages Heero to no longer try to stay quiet either. The sounds the man makes drive Duo wild and he has a hard time not giving in to the urge to finish himself off.

"Fuck…" Heero whines. He sounds close to his own climax, but also like he's holding back. "Ah… Ah!"

"Ohh… yeah… I'm gonna- I'm gonna come," Duo pointlessly announces and as soon as the warning leaves his mouth he comes. He bucks his hips up, thrusting into the tunnel of his hand and he feels droplets of come land on his exposed torso.

"Oh, God!" Heero cries out and then his breath hitches in his throat and he goes quiet, just like he did last time Duo witnessed his orgasm.

A sloppy grin graces Duo's lips. He lets himself relax, riding out the wave of his orgasm and listens to Heero sucking in short breaths. After a moment, he sits up enough to take off his shirt and he uses it to clean himself off. He hears Heero moving around in bed as well and imagines he is also cleaning up. Duo throws his shirt onto the ground and soon after Heero throws something onto the ground as well.

Neither of them say anything while they catch their breath.

Duo's body feels weak and tired. His eyelids are heavy. He is completely sated and at ease, even though he probably should worry about what was happening between him and his Best Soldier Friend. He is too sleepy and too content to fret and all he can do is hope that the same applies to Heero.

He falls asleep.

* * *

 **Short but** **swe-** **smutty.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's note:**

 **Waking up to 0 reviews on the new chapter is like waking up on Christmas morning and not getting any presents because your parents don't love you anymore. While you did make them a present.**

 **So here you go, Mom, Dad. I made this for you.**

 **[EDIT: don't skip chapter seven! Because the two updates followed eachother so closely, FF doesn't seem to note them as separate: it says the story was last updated on the fourth, but it was last updated an hour or so ago, today, on the fifth]**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Eight**_

They never acknowledged what happened once daylight returned and Duo was fine with that. He didn't want to think about it too much himself. Unspoken and ignored, he could pretend that it didn't mean anything and that it would have no consequences to his friendship with Heero, nor to his relationships at home.

Follander was the last guy in their unit went to go on leave, exactly according to the rotation schedule. Heero had been on a six week medical leave, which nullified his rights to a two-week RNR. The Japanese-American didn't seem to mind much; he had spent enough time Stateside during his recovery. Duo was grateful that he wouldn't have to spend more time on base without his friend.

While Follander was away, the unit was definitely more subdued. Follander had a way of riling everyone up, especially when it came to pestering Lindsey, or pulling pranks on their superiors that got them all in trouble once or twice. More than a few men were relieved to have a break from the joker.

They have the afternoon off and they spend it in the Rec Hall, which is the only building, aside from the Sergeant's offices, that benefits from some measure of air-conditioning. Duo is shooting hoops with Heero while the other men lazily lounge on the couch, cycling through the DVD's for a third time and speaking along with the dialogue.

Considering his height advantage, he should have no trouble getting the upper hand playing basketball opposite Heero, but the shorter man has a lightning fast dribble and while he is simply too short to block Duo's shots, Duo is too sluggish to stop Heero's and, more often than not, it's nothing-but-net as the ball flies through the hoop.

Heero has a serious, focused expression on his face and his tension reads in his mouth and neck as well. Heero never does anything half-assed. He's competitive as Hell and a sore loser on top of that – thankfully for him, he is rarely bested by anyone. Duo bravely keeps matching his score, but he is always working to catch up, he is never ahead in the points and Heero makes matters more hopeless for him when he scores an effortless three-pointer.

"I don't get it," Duo remarks, a little out of breath. He sways his weight from side-to-side, trying to anticipate which way Heero will try to bypass him on his way to the hoop. "You're not tall. You're not black. You should suck at this game."

The joke splinters Heero's serious façade and he cracks up laughing. However, his reflexes are too quick for Duo to be able to use the distraction to his advantage to steal the ball away from his opponent. Duo got close though and they both go: "Ooohhh" and then laugh again.

"There's something I don't get either," Heero retorts. With the way he is playing with the ball it is obvious he is taunting Duo. "You're, what? Six-one? Six-two?"

" _Two-and-a-half_ , thankyouverymuch."

"Right. And you still can't dunk worth shit."

"Hey! I got a lot of gravity dragging me down," Duo objects to the insults. "I don't expect you to understand, _midget_." Heero wasn't actually that short, he just looked short in comparison to Duo and the other guys in the unit, whose height was far above average.

In spite of his laughter, the other man still manages to trick Duo. Duo moves his body left in an attempt to block him, but Heero goes the other way and dribbles the ball right by him. Duo straightens up and doesn't even bother anymore. A second later he hears the swish of the net as the ball passes through it. He notices two of the other guys had pried their attention away from the movie and were sitting backwards on the couch, watching the game with a grin. Duo shrugs and throws his hands up in defeat. When they laugh at him, he flips them off.

He is hit in the back with the ball that bounces off him and then rolls across the half-court. He spins around and mock-glares at his friend. He stalks closer to him and then reaches out his long arms. He snatches Heero by the front of his shirt and yanks him closer to him before wrestling him to the ground. Heero puts up a good fight, but gravity is on Duo's side in this instance as he lowers his full weight down onto the smaller body. They play-fight for a minute and Heero actually comes close to throwing him off him, but he can't follow through – not without actually hurting Duo. The taller man has no doubt that if Heero wasn't concerned with the well-being of his attacker, he'd use his flexibility to knee him in the groin and twist out from under him and pin his wrists to his back.

Duo literally drapes himself on top of Heero and relaxes, turning his body into a dead weight on top of the other.

"Oh, God," Heero grits, "get _off_."

"I'm sorry but 'off' is not the magic word."

"Fucking Hell, you're like the big brother I never wanted."

"Incorrect. Please try again," he says in a robotic voice. He knows he is being juvenile, but Heero was actually a lot like the little brother he did always want.

"Ryan Gosling! _Ryan Gosling_!" Heero yields, patting Duo's back to urge him to get up.

With a grunt Duo pushes himself up from the floor and helps Heero up to his feet as well.

After three tours of fourteen months each, you start to have some really weird discussions that turn heated for no good reason. Like which Ryan has the dreamiest smile: Gosling or Reynolds. And, frankly, Duo still believed it was travesty that Heero argued in favor of Reynolds, even after they all watched The Notebook and pretended not to cry at the end of the movie.

 _Honestly, though, Reynolds? Really?_

Heero's face is red from exertion and laughter. His hair is messy and it invites Duo to run his hand through it. Heero allows the touch, although something flickers in his eyes, like he distrusts Duo's intentions. Duo smiles at him and it makes everything alright.

The unit has dinner together. On Saturdays, the Mess Hall serves pizza: honest to God American pizza, flown in frozen from the USA, courtesy of a large pizza-chain supporting the troops. Duo trades one half of his pizza for Heero's, since they both couldn't decide which kind they wanted. The other guys reenact part of the movie they watched that afternoon and then also find the time to make fun of Duo's jump shot.

After eating their full, they suit up again and head out, escorting another caravan of supplies that had arrived that morning on the base's landing strip. They take the caravan to the meeting point halfway between Sharana and Delaram, where a crew from FOB Delaram is waiting to take charge of the supplies. The men from Delaram look weathered and tired and Duo sympathizes. After a few months of being stationed at Sharana, they have gotten used to the luxuries of their new operating base and Delaram had been reduced to an unpleasant memory. They talk briefly with the other soldiers, but both teams have a long trek back, so they part ways and each crew goes back to their own base.

They walk through Sharana's gates at two in the morning and most say thanks-but-no-thanks to their shower privileges and head straight for their barracks. But Duo isn't about to pass up on the opportunity for a refreshing shower and neither is Heero.

They are the only ones in the bath house and still they pick two shower heads right next to each other. They don't say a word as they soap themselves up. Duo can't help but steal glances though and Heero catches him looking more than once, but still he doesn't say anything. The electricity that passes between them whenever they make fleeting eye-contact excites Duo and by the time he has rinsed the shampoo out of his hair, he is half-hard and he spies that Heero is in the same state.

Once they are in their beds and the light is out, they both masturbate again and the only reason Duo even bothers trying to muffle his own moans with his pillow is because he is getting so loud he is worried the guys in the barracks next to theirs might otherwise overhear.


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's note:**

 **It's just smut. Oops. Next chapter will be up soon!**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Nine**_

It's the tenth month of their tour and for Duo, jerking off in his cot with his fellow soldier only three feet away, is no longer strange; it's a turn on and it's something he looks forward to and it's become almost a nightly routine for them. They never speak of their nighttime pleasure, not even in the darkness of the night after they've just finished. But Duo thinks about it all the time: when he falls in line behind the Corporal during their drills or patrols, when they sit shoulder-to-shoulder in the Mess Hall, when they get competitive and handsy during a game of basketball in the Rec Hall or a game of football in the dirt outside. Especially when they stand next to each other in the showers and Duo steals glances at the naked body of his friend, titillated by the fact that Heero knows he is looking and never warns him not to.

It's a game to Duo – an innocent game, but an exciting one.

Never a dull moment at Camp Sharana.

It is night again and Duo fights to keep quiet so he can better hear the delightful sounds Heero is making. It varies between soft gasps, pitchy whines and deep, rumbling moans and Duo likes everything the same. He is under his warm covers and his body is heated from the arousal, but there are goosebumps on his forearms anyway. He halts the movement of his fist and just holds his cock by the base and feels it twitch in response to Heero.

"Nnn… I'm close," Heero announces, too soon for Duo's liking.

Although sometimes they say things while masturbating together, they never actually talk _to_ each other; they never verbally respond to each other. Anything that is said, is said to no one. At least, that was the game of pretend that they had been keeping up. But Duo breaks from that unspoken rule as he replies: "Not yet. Give us a little longer."

Heero grunts and Duo can't tell if he liked or resented being spoken to in the heat of the moment. It would be much easier if he could see his face. He wants to see his face. He wants to see the pleasure written all over his features, the way he had that one night, when they had both been seated on Heero's cot. The night of the kiss. That was weeks ago, but it still fueled Duo's fantasies more than anything.

"Can you hold off?" It's daring to ask him a question, forcing the other to respond; it could ruin everything.

Finally, Heero replies through gritted teeth: "…yeah."

Duo spits into his hand again, to get it wet after letting the saliva dry in his palm and holds his hand still around his erection so he can buck up into it. A few weeks ago, whenever he closed his eyes, his hand stopped being his own – it became Heero's hand. Lately, his hand is not anybody's hand, it is Heero's body. He hasn't tried to figure out what that means, exactly – it's confrontational and maybe a little disturbing and he doesn't want to taint these nights with anything real, with anything he might have to take back home with him.

This is wartime and they have to make do with what they have. Duo intends to leave all these thoughts and desires behind at Camp Sharana when they leave. Nothing has to change. There are some things about war that you can't leave behind – no matter how hard you try – and that is what PTSD therapy is for, but what is happening between him and Heero is just an innocent game. It has become his favorite game to play at war, but he has different games at home.

 _Don't cross the streams._

He pants through his open mouth and keeps wetting his bottom lip with his tongue. He yearns for a kiss and it's driving him crazy. He at least wants to see the lips he hasn't been able to stop thinking about.

With his free hand he reaches out and boldly switches on the light on the nightstand that separates their cots.

"Fuck! Duo!" Heero objects and he glares at him for only a moment before turning his face away from him. His hand has stilled under the blanket, but he is not letting go of himself, too close to climax to be willing to give up entirely, in spite of the unwanted interruption.

"I want to see you."

"There's nothing to see anyway," he hisses, "we're both under the covers."

"I don't want to see your dick, Heero," he argues although he acknowledges with a start that he is not being truthful, "I want to see _you_."

"Why?" He whines and on top of having his face twisted towards the wall, he covers his face with left hand as well.

"Just let me." He doesn't have a better answer ready than that. Having nothing else to look at, he focuses on the delicate shape of the shell of Heero's small ears, he follows the sharp jawline, noting the tension as Heero clenches his jaw shut and he licks his lips again watching the curve of his throat. Duo continues to pleasure himself and doesn't bite back any of his moans. Heero tenses up further, Duo can see it in the way his collarbones become more prominent, outlined by dark shadows. "Come on," he urges, his voice deep and low. "I know you're close. I know you need this."

Heero twists his head further and moans around a mouthful of pillowcase. In spite of his embarrassment, he give in to the needs of his body. He brings his knees up to hide the movement of his hand as he follows Duo's lead and continues to stroke himself.

Duo brings his left hand back down to roll and squeeze his balls, adding to his pleasure. "I'm touching my balls too… feels so good," he breathes, meaning to tempt Heero.

After a while, Heero also moves his left hand under the covers, but he purposefully keeps his face turned away to hide from Duo's prying stare. "…fuck…"

"It's been a long fucking tour…" Duo says and a single, dry chuckle escapes him. "I still remember that kiss."

That remark causes Heero to snap his head around to fix a surprised stare on Duo, but all Duo can do is moan at the sight of him. He looks even better than he remembered. His full lips are wet and parted and a little swollen, probably from biting on them. His eyes are only half open and long, black lashes darken the blue of his irises. His cheeks are flushed red. Heero's shock melts away and he bites his lip again when he succumbs to the pleasure. He squeezes his eyes shut but opens them when Duo begs him to keep looking at him.

"You're pretty," Duo extols breathlessly. He means it, and not only because the only seven women on base look more like men than most of the guys do.

"Fuck you."

They keep their gazes locked as they bring themselves to completion and it crosses Duo's mind that it is the most intimate sexual experience he has ever had and he doesn't at all comprehend it. They both fight to keep their eyes open as their orgasm hits them, but eventually Heero gives into the intensity and he shuts his eyes and throws his head back. His mouth is open in another soundless moan and Duo catches himself wishing for the chance to make him scream during his orgasm – maybe even specifically cry out Duo's name.

He makes sure to catch his come in his hand because his sheets aren't due for laundry until the end of the week.

They both take a moment to compose themselves, but Duo never tears his gaze away from Heero's face and waits for the other to look at him again. When blue eyes meet his, he offers him a cheeky grin and one corner of Heero's mouth curls up as well.

Emboldened by the night's success, Duo tucks himself back into his boxers and then throws the covers to the side and get out of bed. He never breaks eye-contact with Heero and he can read the question in his eyes, but he doesn't say anything. He kneels down next to the cot where Heero lies frozen and waiting. He strokes one hand through the longer hair on the top of Heero's head as he slowly leans down, giving Heero time to turn away or punch him in the face if that is what he would prefer to a kiss. Heero just keeps waiting. Neither of them is thinking clearly, that is what Duo blames it on.

The distance closes between them and they both close their eyes the moment their lips meet. The kiss starts shallow and tentative, like it was last time, but when Heero doesn't turn away, he leaves Duo the opportunity to pour more passion into the kiss. Their lips move together, lazy and unhurried in the aftermath of their orgasm. Duo licks at Heero's bottom lip and takes his cue when Heero opens his mouth further. He slides his tongue between the parted lips and meets with Heero's. It's a shy dance, without purpose. They feel and taste each other. It's perfect and Duo sighs into the kiss.

When Duo pulls back, Heero raises his head off the pillow, chasing Duo's lips like he doesn't want the kiss to end, but he catches himself and lets his head lower back down. Their gazes meet again and there is no panic, or distress, or confusion between them. Duo smiles down sheepishly and Heero mirrors him.

Wordlessly, they clean up the mess they had made of themselves and go to sleep.

* * *

 **Remember that one story of mine? About a pickpocket who got in over his head thanks to his idiot baby brother and then started falling for the billionaire he is set to rob? I hope you can remember. Even though it looked like I had forgotten, I haven't…**


	10. Chapter 10

**Author's note:**

 **Thanks for the support y'all! Means the world :D**

 **"Dirty Job" chapter 18 will upload this weekend :)**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Ten**_

Whenever Heero looks at him, Duo remembers that night and the way those blue eyes turned to dark storm clouds as he became overwhelmed with pleasure. The memory gets Duo aroused in the most inconvenient moments, but, luckily, the fatigues are forgiving.

He calls his girlfriend more often, as if he is trying to remind himself of another reality that he is starting to lose track of without ever missing it. But his conversations with Hilde bore him. He holds the phone to his hear and lets her whisper sweet nothings to him as he stares across the bank of computer. At the other side, Heero is thoughtlessly scrolling through his emails, while laughing at something his hometown friend is saying to him over the phone. He closes his email account and twists the desk chair he is seated in left and right, back and forth. His eyes are distant. He speaks very little into the receiver, instead he enjoys hearing his friend's voice and getting caught up on the mundane details of the daily grind on the other side of the world.

Every soldier knows they are only being told half-truths by the home front. If anything bad has happened, their family and friends won't volunteer any information, because they don't want them to worry; they don't want them to be distracted. After every tour, Duo has come home to find that people have been laid off, gotten divorced and passed away. Every time he insists to his mother that she shouldn't keep the sad news from him, but secretly, he doesn't mean this and she knows. It's the same for Heero. He assures his friends and family that he can handle it, but honestly, none of them want to hear about the misery that happens at home, because it only makes them feel hopeless and guilty for not being there in a time when they are needed.

Duo wraps up his conversation with Hilde and then makes a quick call to his mother, since he has some time left on the clock. Her voice fades away when his gaze meets Heero's across the room. The Corporal gets up and leaves the tent. They have the rest of the evening off and he is probably heading for their barrack. The eye-contact is intense. It's never not, not anymore.

Duo raises his hand in a half-hearted wave and mouths "later" before forcing himself to focus on the story his mother is telling him about someone she ran into at the mall. It's a boring story, but he likes boring; it's a welcome break. However, when the story drags on, he starts to get antsy. He'd much rather end the conversation and go hang out with Heero. Whatever that may lead to.

He plucks at the folds in his trousers and traces the shapes in the camouflage pattern with his index finger, responding with nothing more than an occasional "Hm".

"Are you tired, darling?" She asks after concluding the account of her adventures.

"Hm? Uh- no. Well, yeah, I guess."

She chuckles at his jumbled answer.

He is not tired, his mind is just elsewhere.

"It's only around eight over there, isn't it? Do you still have to go out on patrol or do you have the night off?"

"We have the night off."

"Then I suggest you head to bed early, sweetheart."

That sounds like a good idea, he concurs, although he doesn't intend on going to sleep right away.

"I'm counting down the days until I can hold my son in my arms again."

He shakes his head, but smiles. "Mom…"

"I still think it's not right that they denied you your leave."

He makes a face at being reminded that he lied to his mother about why he wouldn't be home for leave for two weeks. He knew he couldn't tell her the truth – that he didn't _want_ to come home – because she wouldn't understand and she would be offended and hurt. He didn't want to do that to her. A little white lie seemed best. So he told her that he was denied leave as a disciplinary action; that he had gotten caught with some of the booze Follander had smuggled onto base. She had been very angry at him, but it was better than making her sad.

"Only a few more months mom," he tells her. "It's the home-stretch."

"I know. But stay alert. Stay safe."

"I'll try, mom."

"And stay out of trouble."

He grins. "I'll try."

They say a long goodbye and then Duo disconnects the line, just as one of the techs starts to wave at him to signal that his time is up. He hands the satellite phone over to the soldier waiting to take his place and he struts out of the tent and makes a beeline for the barracks, curious if he's ever going to be able to convince Heero to fool around with him before lights-out.

He pops the door open with his shoulder and he finds Heero lying on his own cot, on top of the sheets. He's reading his French book with a look of concentration that seems overacted. His legs are casually crossed at the ankle, but his body is rigid with tension. "Hey, Purple Heart."

"Princess," he acknowledges without peeling his gaze away from the pages.

It's a game and Duo definitely wants to play. He forces the door shut behind him and toes off his boots. "Whatcha readin'?"

Heero flits his gaze up at him with a quirk of his eyebrow. The title on the cover of the book is bold and obvious.

CONVERSATIONAL FRENCH.

"Humpty Dumpty," the Japanese-American deadpans.

"Read it to me?"

"It's too scary for you."

Duo smirks. He likes their banter. It has never changed, they've always shared a snappy, biting sense of humor, but the vibe between them was different somehow. Every exchange was electrified. It was like they were daring each other to eventually say something raunchy and too-true.

In two steps he is at Heero's bedside and he snatches the book out of Heero's hands. If Heero hadn't wanted Duo to steal the book from him, he wouldn't have been able to, but Duo still jabs: "So much for those reflexes." Rather than walking to his own cot, he sits down on the edge of Heero's, even though there is barely any space. He makes a show of licking his finger and theatrically leafing through the pages with a haughty expression.

Heero waits.

Duo is hyperaware of the warmth that radiates from the body that lies prone next to him. Heero has his hands folded on top of his abdomen and one thumb idly strokes up and down. Duo directs his eyes back to the text in the book, and pretends to read aloud: "Hm. Voulez vous coucher avec moi…" He glances sideways and watches Heero's expression break into a silly smile.

"It doesn't say that!"

Duo snaps the book shut. "Well, it should! It's the only 'conversational French' anybody has any need for." He tosses the book clear across the room.

His disrespect for the item genuinely upsets Heero. "Hey!" He raises himself up in a seated position, but the angry, pinched look to his eyebrows melts away when they both realize how close they are to each other. Heero's gaze drifts down to Duo's lips and he swallows.

Duo isn't sure if the other is going to try to move away, to reestablish some distance between them, but he doesn't wait to find out. He brings an arm around him and takes a hold of the back of his neck. It's not gentle; it's desperate and needy. He feels Heero's tension and his racing pulse. "Sorry," he whispers, referring to how he mistreated Heero's property, although it is obvious the man no longer cares about the book.

"… Make it up to me." He doesn't look nearly as suave as the smooth comeback implies.

Duo lurches forward and slams their mouths together. The kiss is a lot of teeth and tongue and doesn't resemble their previous two lip-locks in any way. For all its imprecision and aggression, it is arousing nonetheless. It's rough in the way Duo had always expected a kiss with another man to be like. It's as chaotic as Duo feels.

In between the kiss they both gasp for air but neither wants to part. Heero first has his fingers twisted into the front of Duo's shirt, but then he drops his hand down onto Duo's thigh and clutches at a handful of his trousers. Realizing that Heero is not going to move that hand up to where he needs it to be, Duo reaches into his lap himself and fondles the hard bulge. He groans into Heero's mouth.

When he is done ravaging the other with his kiss, he pulls back and admires his handiwork. Heero's hair is a mess, falling forward into his face. His cheeks are flushed a bright red. His eyes are dimmed by clouds. His lips are red, swollen and wet. Duo decides it's a good look on him. He imagines he doesn't look much different himself. He's not done yet though, he wants to unravel the perfect soldier further. With a hand against Heero's chest he pushes him back down and instructs him to make room for him on the narrow cot. They barely fit into the bed together, lying on their sides, facing each other, separated by only an inch of space.

Duo holds Heero's gaze and fumbles to push his trousers and underwear down just far enough to expose himself. He can tell Heero is struggling to not steal a glance. Duo smirks at him, but Heero doesn't seem to think it's funny and he kisses that smirk away. During the kiss, Heero shifts too; unzipping his trousers and taking himself out of his underwear.

The closeness, the heated kisses, the daylight – albeit fading – is all new to them, but it doesn't deter them.

Duo takes himself in his hand and strokes himself. Sometimes, his knuckles brush against Heero's as the other man is also working his fist up and down his length. The kiss becomes distracted, but Duo doesn't want to pull away and neither does Heero. The movement of their lips is halfhearted and uncoordinated. At times, they are not even moving at all, just keeping their lips pressed together and panting against the other's mouth.

Duo worms his other hand out from under himself and brings it down between them. Rather than touch himself, he teases the head of Heero's erection with a delicate touch of his thumb and forefinger. Heero lets out a pitiful whine and bucks his hips, causing their arousals to meet. "Holy shit," Duo grounds out and he breaks the kiss for the first time to look down. The head of Heero's cock is pressed up against his and it feels dangerously good. He doesn't think – he acts on instinct and wraps his fingers around both of their erections as much as he can and he rocks his pelvis so their shafts rub together.

"…Oh, God." Heero's breath comes out trembling.

Duo captures his mouth in another kiss and they both rut into Duo's hand. It's a search to find the right rhythm to match the other, but they succeed.

"This is amazing," Duo breathes against the soft lips of his friend.

"Nnnn…"

"Am I crazy? Doesn't this feel _amazing_?" He thinks back to the end of his last tour and having sex with Hilde on the night of his return. He remembers it as the best sex he's ever had – as the greatest high – and he ascribes that to it having been the end of the longest dry-spell of his life. He doesn't remember it being nearly as good as what he is feeling right now; how Heero is making him feel. Maybe everything is distorted, because that was the past and this is the present and he is unfairly comparing the two, but it is _amazing_.

"Shut up," Heero orders and licks into Duo's mouth to silence him more effectively.

Duo comes shortly after, with a grunt. He spills his come onto his own hand and spreads it down their lengths. It's filthy but it adds to his rush and as he strokes himself through the aftermath, Heero climaxes as well, biting on Duo's bottom lip a little harder than is pleasant. When his lip is released, Duo smooths over the sore skin with his tongue. He opens his eyes to see Heero has his eyes squeezed shut tightly. His hips are still stuttering as he rides out the wave of his orgasm and Duo releases his own cock, which has become too sensitive to keep touching, so he can continue to stroke Heero until he is completely spent.

Heero opens his eyes again and his expression is nothing but calm as he stares back at Duo.

The taller man brings his hand up, wanting to brush a lock of chocolate brown hair away from Heero's forehead, but Heero takes one look at his hand and recoils.

"Get that away from me!"

He is confused for only a split second and then he realizes the mess they had made of his hand. Come is dripping off his fingers and settling in the lines of his palm. He lets out a hearty laugh and wipes it on his outer thigh, knowing his trousers are due for a wash anyway. "Sorry 'bout that." He grins at him.

Heero rolls onto his back, nearly falling into the gap between the cot and the wall. He braces his heels on the bed and raises his hips to put his underwear and pants back on. Duo follows suit.

Normally, they would just go to sleep afterward, but it is still too early for that. They lay next to each other, sandwiched together, and gaze up at the ceiling. Outside, they can hear a group of guys playing football; scuffling in the dirt, shouting expletives and complaining to a ref that isn't even there.

"Wanna join the game?" Duo absentmindedly inquires.

"…Nah."

He is relieved. He doesn't want to play either. He is not tired, but he is so damn relaxed and at ease and he wants to stay right where he is, when that shouldn't make any sense, given that the cot is definitely too small for the two of them to comfortably fit together. After a few minutes have gone by, he becomes aware of the throbbing pain in his bottom lip and he touches his finger to it. It hurts more when he applies pressure. "You bit me," he states dumbly. It's not exactly a complaint.

"Sorry."

Noting his friend doesn't sound very apologetic at all, he whimpers for effect: "It really hurts." He laughs when Heero smacks his chest.

"Don't be such a fucking baby."

"Don't marginalize," he mock-chastises, "I'm seriously wounded over here!" The bite is probably going to cause a discoloration that he will have to explain away to the other guys come morning.

"You're not getting a Purple Heart for a love-bite, Princess, so quit your whining."

 _Love-bite?_ It is, indeed, a love-bite, he just hadn't thought of it in that way yet. He cocks his head to the side and sees that his friend has his eyes closed and looks very peaceful. His chest rises and falls with slow, even breaths. His hands are resting on his hips, fingers slightly curled. Duo focuses on his face; the valleys, slopes and rises of his profile. He likes looking at him.

"How you doin' over there?" Duo wonders after a few minutes. "Are you sleeping?"

Heero's eyebrows pinch together. He hadn't been asleep, but he had been pretty close. "Hmm… Just relaxing."

Duo turns sideways again, causing the cot to shake and Heero's mouth to tighten in dismay. He props his head up in his hand and continues with a childish tone: "Whatcha thinking about?"

"I was thinking about how nice it was that you finally kept your trap shut," Heero deadpans, keeping his eyes closed as he tries to go back to that peaceful, relaxed state.

"You want me to be quiet?"

"Hmm."

"Make me," he teases suggestively.

Heero cracks his eyes open. Slivers of piercing blue peer at him. "I will kill you."

Duo chuckles. "Nah, I ain't worried. You wouldn't. You'd miss me too much."

"If you don't shut up, I _will_ kill you." As an afterthought he adds: "I'd cry at your funeral though."

Duo laughs at the dry joke. He is put at ease knowing everything is still cool between them. There is little in life that Duo cherishes more than his friendship with Heero and he wouldn't want to ruin that – not even in exchange for a mind-blowing orgasm. It is nice that he doesn't have to choose.

He settles back down, resting his head on the pillow, closely to Heero. His chin touches the other man's shoulder. He first keeps his arm draped down his own side but he shifts to make himself more comfortable and lays his arm across Heero's midriff, without being met with protest. Heero turns his face towards Duo ever so slightly, but never opens his eyes. Duo whispers: "I'll shut up. I promise". It makes a smile appear on Heero's kissable lips.

* * *

 **#Foreshadowing ?**


	11. Chapter 11

**The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Eleven**_

They are in Heero's bed again.

They had just spent the last hour making eyes at each other across the poker table and trying to one-up the other by betting more and more of their doritos chips. Only to get so distracted that Chapple snuck by under the radar and laid a damn Straight Flush down on the table, claiming everyone's chips as his own. They had pretended to be sore losers so they could ditch the guys for the rest of the night.

Heero makes soft, mewling sounds against Duo's lips as Duo rubs their erections together.

"Like that?" The taller one breathes.

Heero lets out a low groan and becomes more demanding with his kiss. Duo finds it difficult to return the kiss when he's smirking from ear to ear. But nothing is amusing anymore when Heero inches closer, rolls Duo onto his back and climbs half on top of him. His hands grasp Duo's face as he takes full control of the kiss.

Duo moans and abandons the task of holding their dicks together in favor of further exploring the body on top of him. They are both still wearing their trousers – pushed down to mid-thigh – and their T-shirts. Duo's hands glide along Heero's back, feeling the fabric of the shirt ripple underneath his touch. Heero's body heat radiates through the material. Curious for more, his slips his hands under the shirt and follows the same path up to his shoulders where he feels tense muscles. He is pretty sure it isn't the bad kind of tension, but he rubs his back until he relaxes a little anyway. In the meantime, he fights back with his tongue.

Heero rocks his hips against him and with their cocks sandwiched between their stomachs it provides them both with the perfect amount of pleasure: enough to stay in their blissful state of ecstasy, but falling just short of bringing them to an embarrassingly swift release, as they dry-hump like teenage boys at summer camp, as opposed to adult men at war.

Boldly, Duo directs his hands back down, trailing the curve of Heero's spine. He makes his touch feather light as his fingers reach the other man's behind and graze over the rounded flesh.

With a jolt Heero pushes his upper body up and away from Duo, ending their kiss.

"Sorry," he is quick to say and he holds his hands up in surrender. He does not want this to be over because of a stupid mistake.

Heero swallows. "No… it's fine. Just… tickled." He lowers himself back down on top of Duo's chest again and recaptures his mouth. There is less haste to their kiss and they are both a little distracted, wondering about the next step.

Duo has his arms around Heero's slender waist, hugging him to his body and trying to ignore the itching in his fingers.

The other shifts to place kisses along Duo's jaw. His nose tickles his ear before he licks at the shell and then challenges: "Are you going to touch me, or what?"

Duo grins and this time he strongly grabs at Heero's ass, pressing his fingers into the soft flesh. He uses his hold on him to take charge of the rocking motion of their lower bodies.

Heero's moans come out muffled as he drops his head down and buries his face in the pillow. It's Duo's turn to kiss his ear and neck. He digs his heels into the bed for leverage to add more power to their matching thrusts. It feels wonderful and he savors it for as long as he can stand it; it won't be enough to get either of them over the edge.

With a growl he throws Heero off of him and manhandles him by his hips until he's lying on his side with his back facing Duo. Heero throws a worried look over his shoulder as Duo slots up behind him and Duo lets out a rumbling chuckle at his friend's wide-eyed expression. "Don't worry. Not gonna fuck you." He moans in surprise at his own words. It's a little jarring to realize that he definitely wants to have sex with Heero in that moment. He doesn't let that thought distract him and cranes his neck to give Heero a kiss. He hikes up the man's shirt to bare his abdomen and chest and lets his hands glide over every inch of golden skin. He's apprehensive about paying any particular attention to the pert nipples, but whenever his course palms brush over them, Heero fails to bite back a moan.

Duo takes one hand off of Heero only long enough to spit into it and spreads the saliva over his own erection. Heero tenses up again and says "wait, wait, wait", although he doesn't try to pull away. "Chill out," Duo says. He chuckles into the hair at the nape of Heero's neck. "I used to do this with my girlfriends all the time when I was a teenager." He lines his wet cock up between Heero's ass cheeks and rolls his hips to create friction between the skin. He moans into Heero's ear and nibbles at his earlobe.

Heero is taking deep breaths and releasing each with a huff, like he is stressing out and needs to get himself to relax.

"Are you cool with this?"

Heero clasps at Duo's hand that is on his hip, holding him still as he rocks against him. "I- I don't know."

He slips his hand from Heero's grasp and reaches around him to encircle his neglected erection. He pumps the tight tunnel of his fist up and down the length, swiping his thumb over the tip every time. "How 'bout now?"

Heero arches into him, releasing the last of his deep breaths in a shudder. "Nnnn… Starting to win me over."

"Fuck yeah."

As they continue to chase their climax, Duo reapplies saliva to his cock two more times, to ensure he remains slick and his skin moves easily and pleasurably against Heero's. With his wet hand he jerks Heero off. He keeps kissing his ear and neck, occasionally convincing Heero to turn his head so he can ravage his mouth. He likes kissing him when they are both overwhelmed and distracted like that; the kiss reduced to nothing more than their parted lips brushing together, exchanging hot breaths and their tongues instinctually swiping at the other's lip while lacking all focus to actually deepen the kiss.

"Feel good?" Duo asks, although the answer is obvious, given how nicely Heero is keening.

"Don't fish for a compliment," Heero grunts in response.

The taller man smirks and tightens his fingers around the base of his partner's erection.

"Ow! Be nice."

Duo chuckles and loosens up so he can continue to stroke him.

They stare into each other's eyes and moan with every breath as the pleasure builds and they can feel their climax approaching. Heero arches his back to meet Duo's thrusts. Duo isn't sure if he can come like this – since he is not a hormonal teenage boy anymore – but he feels close and he doesn't want to stop in favor of doing anything else. He loves his closeness to Heero, his thoughtless kisses and his needy erection in his hand. He loves having him completely and willingly at his mercy. Duo's left arm is underneath Heero and snaked around his torso. His thumb is poised over a nipple and he experimentally flicks the swollen bud, smiling at the surprised gasp the stimulation draws from the other.

"Ah! Nnn… Oh… Oh!" Heero reaches back and slides his hand around the back of Duo's neck. He doesn't pull him closer to attempt another kiss, he just holds him close and holds their intimate eye-contact. "… Are you close?" He asks with strained voice.

"Want you to come first," he grits.

Heero squeezes his eyes shut, but only for a moment. "You should-… You should get me drunk first, next time we do this."

Duo quirks an eyebrow at him. "Why?"

"Nnn! Because…" He sucks in a desperate breath. "…I'd definitely let you fuck me if I was drunk. Ah!" He closes his eyes and twists his head away, burying his face in the pillow to muffle his cries as his body goes rigid and he shoots his load into Duo's hand.

"Holy shit." Heero's admission has an unspeakable effect on him. He bites into Heero's shoulder and he doesn't even realize he is coming until he feels how much more slippery Heero's backside becomes as he snaps his hips against him in stuttering thrusts. "Ohhh… Ohh, _God_." Apparently, something about Heero has him right back to being that hormonal teenage boy. He smirks and chuckles breathily. Heero's body deflates in his embrace. "That was good, right?" He whispers in his ear.

"Stop fishing for compliments…"

"C'mon. Give me something to work with here."

Heero pointedly looks down at Duo's hand, still loosely wrapped around his soft penis. "I think you know damn well that you showed me a good time."

Duo brings up his hand and studies the come on his fingers with a grin. He makes a mock-grab for Heero's face, remembering Heero's reaction last time, saying: "Oh, because of your jizz, you mean?"

The other cranes his neck to get away from the grabby fingers and he scrunches his face up in disgust.

"What's the problem?" He teases. "You do realize you have my come all over our ass and back, right?"

"Ugh. At least be a gentleman about it."

Duo looks around himself and thinks for a moment. But it's not like he's at home where he has a box of tissues handy for sticky situations like these. He sits up long enough to pull off his shirt and he uses the article of clothing to clean his hand and wipe down Heero's behind. He stares at his ass with a novel sense of longing and curiosity. "So uh… Did you mean what you said?" He tries tentatively. When Heero doesn't respond, he acknowledges that he has to be a bit more blunt. "Should I seriously ask Follander for some booze?"

After a pause, Heero replies ambiguously: "If you want."

" _I want_ ," he shoots back without hesitation.

"…Okay."

Duo nods and tries not to think too much of how casual the agreement is – too casual. "Okay."

* * *

 **Okay?**


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's note:**

 **Warning: Very short! But I'll make it up to you tomorrow with TWO updates! (one for this story and one for "Dirty Job")**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Twelve**_

He has the bottle of vodka tucked against his side, hidden under his jacket, stiffly clutching it against him with his arm. He struts across the compound with an exaggerated swagger, overcompensating for how insecure and frightened he is feeling. It's like walking through the camp with a bomb under his arm; enough power to wreck his entire career in the Marine Corps, even if it's only a third of the way full.

Follander was surprised at his sudden interest in the booze, but he was happy to make a trade. It cost Duo three weeks of swap-rights: whenever Follander would be assigned a chore he didn't feel like Duo, he could call in Duo to do it for him.

As long as he wouldn't get caught, he would have no regrets.

"Why you walking funny, Maxwell? Something wrong?"

Duo freezes and he gets red and sweaty being faced with the Staff Sergeant. He produces the bottle from under his jacket. The clear alcoholic liquid is in a plastic bottle that they used for water. With a smile to fake innocence, he declares: "Just trying to keep it out of the sun." He puts it back in the shadow of his jacket.

The Staff doesn't think anything of it. He nods and continues along his path.

"Holy shit," Duo mutters under his breath and he skitters the rest of the way to his barracks. They are going out for patrol in half an hour and Heero is already at the equipment shack getting ready with the rest of the unit and Duo has to join them soon. He scrambles to find a good hiding space in the bare space, but then thinks better of it and he decides to hide the contraband in plain sight: setting the bottle on his side of the nightstand, between the twin cots.

He throws one last, unsure look over his shoulder before walking out and shutting the door behind him. He makes his way back across the camp and he is grateful Heero already has most of his gear packed up for him. "Thanks."

Heero shoots him a look, not knowing why both Duo and Follander had been running late.

Follander smirks secretly at Duo and Duo makes a face at him, wordlessly urging him to not draw any attention to the situation.

The unit walks out of the gates right on schedule and they spend the night circling the camp about two clicks out. Radio control had picked up chatter coordinating an attack on the FOB, but aside from seeing a pair of tail lights disappear into the desert, the night is quiet and uneventful. Their shift ends just as the sun peeks over the mountainous horizon. The cracked shutters do little to keep the sunlight, or the warmth of the day, out of the barracks, so the two soldiers don't get much sleep, but they stay in their cots and rest until they have to get out again at noon.

The water bottle containing vodka is still on the nightstand, undisturbed. While the two of them are getting dressed in preparation of joining everyone else at the Mess Hall for lunch – which would be their breakfast, Duo has his back turned to Heero and it takes a while for the penny to drop as Heero asks: "Can I have a sip of this?" Duo turns just in time to see Heero put the bottle to his lips and he snatches it out of his hand, spilling some of the liquid on Heero's shirt.

"What the fuck, man?" He wipes his hand over his chest and then pinches the front of his shirt between his fingers and brings it up high enough to sniff it. His brow furrow. "What the Hell?"

"It's vodka," Duo hisses. "I got it from Follander."

"That is some bad fucking vodka, for it to smell like _that_ ," Heero noted.

Duo smells the cap before he screws it back onto the bottle so he can put it away. He makes a face. It did have a pretty strong smell to it, whereas good vodka is supposed to be odorless. Of course, Follander got the vodka from a local distilling the vodka in his shack, using God-knows-what, leaving a lot of impurities in the end product. "Can't exactly have a bottle of Smirnoff flown in." He doesn't care much about the quality anyway; as long as the drink gets the job done.

"Now I have to change out of this shirt." He strips it off and gets a fresh one to put on. With his back turned to Duo, he remarks: "So, you wasted no time, huh?"

It was only the day before yesterday that Heero had dropped the you-should-get-me-drunk-bomb. He smiles sheepishly. "I'm an impatient man."

"Hn." Heero faces him again and his mouth is tight, but only because he's fighting a smirk.

"Let's go. I'm hungry." He easily slings his arm around Heero's shoulders. It's not just that their bodies fit together to well, but also that they are more comfortable around each other than they have ever been – something Duo hadn't expected, but is grateful for.

They decide to wait a few days, to give time for their wake-sleep cycle to return to normal after the night-op. Duo can't deny that he is giddy and jittery with excitement. In the meantime, his turn in the internet café comes up again, but he skips it. He doesn't feel like concerning himself with home right now; he wants to live in the moment guilt-free, without assigning any unnecessary significance to what he and Heero are planning to do. They are just two guys, stuck in a warzone, needing a stress relief. Only, Duo isn't stressed at all, nor does he feel stuck. In fact, he feels content and like he never wants this tour to end.

* * *

 **More tomorrow! What do you think is going to happen next?**


	13. Chapter 13

**Author's note:**

 **Unlucky chapter thirteen...**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Thirteen**_

They each sit on the edge of their own cot, facing each other. There is something odd about this evening, because it's the most planned any of their "encounters" has ever been and that puts a pressure on it that they are both aware of.

Duo stole them plastic cups from the Mess Hall and they both have a big gulp worth of vodka in it. He raises his cup in a toast. "Bottom's up." He downs his drink and Heero follows his lead. Their faces screw up as the liquid burns their tongue and throat. Duo ends up coughing, feeling like he can't breathe. Heero goes red-faced and stares into the empty cup as if it offended him.

"…Oh man," the Japanese-American managed after swallowing a couple of times to help get the aftertaste out of his mouth.

"That's some potent stuff." Duo's voice is comically strained.

"I think Follander's 'friend' might have sold him disinfectant instead."

"Hm…" He nods in agreement. "Another shot?"

Heero shrugs. "Yeah, what the Hell. Why not?"

He grabs the bottle and pours them both another drink.

It is not until after giving the fourth shot a moment to absorb into his system that Duo becomes aware of the effects of the alcohol. He had been doing fine and didn't feel a thing, until, all of a sudden, the edges of his vision blur and he becomes giggly. He feels the heat on his cheeks that he is used to getting when he drinks too much. He shoots a look at Heero and confirms his friend is also comfortably past the point of inebriation. The man is looking at thin air like it both fascinates and confuses him.

Heero catches him staring and raising his eyebrows at him. When Duo grins sloppily, he mirrors him.

"At least it works," Duo surmises. He shakes the bottle; there's barely anything left.

"That it does." His eyes widen as realization hits him. "We're going to have the _worst_ hangover tomorrow." Then he laughs at himself, for being so stupid that he didn't consider this sooner.

"Patrol isn't until three. And we have our sexual harassment refresher in the morning. Everyone sleeps through that anyway."

Heero's rumbling laughter continues, finding it very amusing that they have an anti sexual harassment course in the morning - reminding them of the rules against fraternization and sexual advances – the morning after the two of them will have fucked. Duo think about it for a second and then laughs as well.

He devides the last of the vodka between their two cups. When he says "Bottom's up" for the second time that evening, they both burst out laughing at the word "bottom". Not until they have calmed down a little can they down their last shot.

They banter back and forth, shooting off dry and crass jokes, both enjoying their giggly state so much they almost forget what the point of it is.

Almost.

Duo beckons him over with a crook of his finger and Heero complies, seating himself next to the other. All of a sudden, nothing is funny anymore and Duo crashes his mouth against Heero's and seals his lips with his in a kiss marked by desperation. Heero wraps one arm around his shoulders and drapes one thigh over Duo's, like he wants to crawl into his lap but can't figure out how to make it happen. Duo's hand lands on Heero's raised thigh and he traces the inside seam of his trousers to his groin. He is too drunk to be shy or hesitant, as is Heero.

They take turns helping the other out of his shirt and then lay themselves down on Duo's bed, facing each other. Duo's mouth strays from Heero's and kisses along his jaw before meandering south and circling the Adam's apple. Heero drags his fingernails over Duo's sunburned forearms and a shiver passes through the taller man's entire body, culminating in his curling toes. He maneuvers himself on top of his partner and nudges his legs apart so he can slot between them. Their clothed erections meet and they groan and attempt another kiss. It's a lot of teeth and tongue and very little passion or actual pleasure, but they can't stop. Heero's hands move restlessly over Duo's torso – front and back – searching for something without ever finding it.

Duo snakes a hand in between them to undo their trousers and get some skin-to-skin contact between their cocks. He is eager for it, remembering from other times how much he enjoys it. He has only just unbuckled Heero's belt when they both freeze up at the sound of an alarm.

They break their kiss and stare at each other.

The alarm.

 _The_ alarm!

"Oh shit!" They exclaim in unison.

Duo crawls off Heero and, in his uncoordinated state, not only ends up kneeing the man in the groin but also stumbling over his own feet and falling face first on the dusty floor between their two cots. "Shitshitshitshitshit…" He scrambles to his feet and grabs his shirt and Kevlar vest, throwing Heero his.

Heero puts his vest on without taking the time to bother with his T-shirt, cupping his groin in one hand and grimacing in pain.

"Sorry," Duo frets.

"'S fine," he says through gritted teeth and he pushes Duo out the door, grabbing their rifles, which are propped up against the wall.

The entire camp is lit up by emergency floodlights, casting sharp, black shadows. Everyone comes hurrying out of their barracks, shouting at each other in disorientation. The unit gathers outside of equipment storage just as their Staff Sergeant emerges to give them their packs and instructions.

"Yuy, Chapple, Maxwell, Lindsey and Flint, take the south gate and go around the perimeter, check for explosives or attempts at a breach of the wall. Follander and Medina, you reinforce the team in the western watchtower. Everyone else, you're with me." With a motion of his hand he jogs away and the other four men fall in line behind him.

Follander studies Duo and Heero and instantly knows that they are in no state to leave the relative safety of the camp. Without hesitation, he speaks up: "Princess, Purple Heart, you guys switch with me and Medusa and go up to the watchtower."

"Excuse me?" Medina frowns at him. "How about you just volunteer your own dumb ass to go get shot outside?"

Follander elbows Medina in his ribs and shoots him a look that communicates everything. The Latin-American soldier grumbles his consent and the two of them join the threesome of Chapple, Lindsey and Flint, out the gate. Duo mouths "thank you" and then chases Heero up the stairs of the watchtower, where three others are already set up in sniper position. The five of them provide 360 degrees cover. They spot the muzzle flash of gunfire in the distance and a grenade goes off close enough to the base of the watchtower, at the edge of the compound, for the structure to shake and dust falls out of the overhead roofing and gets in their hair and eyes. They put on their night vision goggles, but the range of the goggles isn't far enough to be able to see anything and they still have nothing but the muzzle flash to go by. Since they can't discriminate between friendly and unfriendly fire, they keep their fingers off the trigger.

Duo's body is vibrating as his system is pumped full of adrenaline and it mixes with the effects of the alcohol. He is on high alert, but has trouble focusing. His hands get so sweaty, he has to take turns wiping his palms on his trousers, switching his hold on his rifle. Through his in-ear he overhears communications within the unit and between units as it is all men on deck in response to the threat.

A caravan of vehicles snakes towards the west gate. All Duo can see are the headlights; five pairs of them. "We have five unidentified vehicles inbound on the west flank. Can anyone confirm we have friendlies coming in?"

The radio tower responds: "Negative, no friendlies incoming."

"Goddammit," he grunts and adjusts his hold on his rifle. Of all fucking nights, these assholes just had to decide to attack when he's stinking drunk. As the vehicles approach, he gets a clear visual of them through his goggles. Five banged-up trucks, two of which with a Gatling gun mounted on the back, aimed upfront, an insurgent ducked behind the weapon.

The first shot is fired and it's Heero. He hits the man behind the gun dead between the eyes and he collapses backwards into the back of the truck. Duo takes a steadying breath and goes for the kill-shot on the second gunman, but the bullet ricochets off the large weapon instead. Luckily, his reload is the fastest of any soldier and before the insurgent can duck Duo takes aim and he confirms the kill with the spatter that comes from the man's head before he collapses into the back of the vehicle.

Neither Duo nor Heero can see the drivers behind the black windshields and you don't fire at an enemy you can't see unless you've exhausted all other options, so they fire at the engines of the cars instead. They fire round after round, until smoke comes out from underneath the hoods and the vehicles roll to a stop a few hundred yards away from the camp. They are swarmed by the teams of soldiers that had been circling the compound and more gunfire ensues. Duo, Heero and the other snipers on the watchtower provide assistance. In the end, none of the attackers surrenders in favor of keeping his life. They come out of hiding, taking desperate shots and soon fall lifeless to the ground. In the distance, the red tail lights of their back-up disappears into the rugged terrain, headed towards the mountain range.

The pops of gunfire dies out and there is radio silence once it is confirmed that the attack has been thwarted and no one on their side got injured in the skirmish.

Duo pulls off his goggles and breathes a sigh of relief. He feels dizzy and nauseous. When he looks at Heero, he can tell his friend isn't feeling much better.

Debriefing is a blur. Luckily, no one notices that Duo's and Heero's eyes are clouded and that their balance is off. Follander covers for them when the Staff Sergeant questions their reassignment, going directly against his orders. The Private explains that Duo and Heero are much better shots than any of them. He takes the brunt of the scolding. Once he is satisfied that the Private has learned his lesson – that he can't dismiss direct orders and reassign two soldiers that both outrank him at his own judgment – the Staff lets it slide without serious repercussions.

Duo and Heero walk back to their barrack in silence, until Duo finally says: "That was really stupid." Everyone always accuses him of being reckless and maybe, to an extent, he was. But he had never done anything close to as dumb as getting piss-ass drunk while in the middle of an active warzone. They could have gotten themselves killed, or worse: have gotten someone else killed. They were lucky nothing had gone terribly wrong, or they would never be able to live with themselves. This thing between them – whatever it was – should just be for fun. It shouldn't interfere with their lives and it _definitely_ shouldn't cost anyone their life.

"Yeah," Heero readily agrees, bowing his head in shame.

They crawl into their own beds, but don't get much sleep that night.

* * *

 **Probably not what most of y'all were expecting :P**


	14. Chapter 14

**The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Fourteen**_

It takes a while to shake off being cock-blocked by the Taliban.

Heero, being the responsible and reliable soldier that he is, struggles with why he would even suggest something as stupid as getting drunk on base. It's not that Heero confides this in Duo, but Duo can tell by the way Heero stares at him when he thinks he doesn't notice – and how he avoids eye-contact as soon as Duo looks his way.

In the new silence between them, Duo has a lot of thoughts on his own.

Maybe it isn't a game. Maybe it isn't innocent. Maybe it isn't inconsequential.

Maybe something real is happening between the two of them.

And it is still happening, even when they can barely look at each other – maybe even more so.

Follander drops down next to Duo in the dirt. The unit is playing a game of football out in the clear, by the western wall, where they usually start their drills. Duo needed a breather and planted his ass in the sand. He has sipped on an entire bottle worth of water and is content to continue to watch the rest of the game, rather than join in. He is tired because he hasn't been sleeping well for the past few days, since the attack. He knows Heero isn't getting much sleep either, which is why he is looking a little sluggish out there, but he soldiers on; always unwilling to give into weakness.

"That was water, right?" Follander jokes, nodding at the empty bottle that Duo holds loosely.

"Yeah. Just water."

"You couldn't have known, man," the Private tries to ease his mind. "Give yourself a break."

"No, we couldn't have known," Duo agrees. "None of us know when the next attack is going to come. Which is exactly why it is such a spectacularly bad idea to get drunk." He shoots Follander a look. He doesn't blame the Private. Heero and he made their own decisions. But he never used to think much of the soldier's little trade on the side, until now. It's dangerous. He understands the impulse and the craving for a break from the tension and the stress that the war puts them under, and Follander shouldn't enable those unwise desires by offering booze to every soldier that could use a little pick-me-up.

Follander fiddles with his fingers, aware of the scrutiny he is under. He feels the need to defend himself, even though Duo hasn't said anything. "Dude, I'm just the supplier. Drink responsibly, that's what I always say." He tries a smile.

"There is no such thing as responsible drinking in a warzone."

The man releases a sigh and watches Heero chase Chapple down, who has the football clutched against his chest and is racing towards the far end of the field. The end-zone line is defined by two helmets on either side. "I was expecting this talk from Purple Heart."

"Heero's at war with himself right now," Duo says absentmindedly.

"Did you guys have a fight about it, or something?"

The Lance Corporal frowns. "No. Why?"

"You two have been acting weird."

"Not at all. We've just been… quiet."

Follander snorts. "Yeah, like I said: acting weird. Mister-and-Mister Siamese twins, joined at the hip, don't even sit next to each other in the Mess Hall anymore."

He shouldn't be surprised that the others are noticing Heero and he haven't been themselves. "We both just feel really guilty. We're all relying on each other out here."

"Which is why Medusa and I switched places with you guys. And you two still nailed those insurgents driving up. It all worked out."

"I'm grateful that you covered our asses, but it shouldn't be like that. What if something had happened to you or Medina out there and what if Heero and I couldn't make those shots?"

Follander gestures dismissively. "I ain't got time left to worry about the _woulda-coulda-shoulda_ , on top of everything else going on around here. Shit is complicated enough right here, in the here-and-now."

 _That is true_ , Duo agrees wryly. "Who else still has some booze at the moment?"

"Look, I'll quit my little business, okay?" Follander promises. "We only have one month left on this tour anyway. But I won't be ratting anybody out, cuz I don't know what you are going to do to clear your conscience." He pats Duo's shoulder. "I'm protecting you from yourself, trust me. I'm not going to let you become a snitch out of sense of duty."

"I wouldn't rat anyone out," Duo argues, "just have a talk with them."

"Leave it be, Princess." Follander rejoins the game, tackling Lindsey to the ground. The young soldier protests: "I don't even have the ball, you asshole!" Everyone piles on top of the blond-haired youngster, rumbling with laughter. Except for Medina, who takes everything too seriously, including a game of football, and Heero, who visibly gets lost in his own thoughts again in the absence of a distraction.

They have an assignment after dinner: a short trip to a nearby village. It is what the Staff calls one of their "diplomatic missions". There are no leads or threats tracing back to the village, but a couple of the homes burned down yesterday – a common problem in the area, the shoddy electrical systems short-circuit all the time. They take two Humvees and a truck and hand out water and food, like they are on a humanitarian mission, to counteract the negative impression many of the locals have of the occupying military force. Hopes are to stop the area from radicalizing further.

It's still early in the evening when they arrive back at Camp Sharana and hit the showers.

Duo stands in between Lindsey and Chapple. Heero is against the opposite wall, with his back turned towards him. The unit banters back and forth as they always do and Duo can't help but get swept up by their juvenile sense of humor. It reminds him of that one year he was at college and joined a fraternity. College, as it turns out, wasn't for Duo. And neither was the fraternity, not really. They weren't a real brotherhood like the men that served together in the military, and that was all Duo ever wanted: to find a family for himself, one in which he could belong. Unlike the family he was born into. His father and grandfather had been soldiers themselves, but Duo never felt a bond with them. For them, the military was about structure and success – superiors versus subordinates – and they brought that mentality into their parenting.

For Duo, the military was about being part of something greater than yourself, not about chasing your own ambitions. He wants equals, not underlings. There are no equals when you spend your entire career struggling to get to the top, leaving friends behind in warzones as you take up your station at the Pentagon, like his father, or become Admiral of a ship, like his grandfather.

He wants to stay right here, in this time and place, surrounded by these people.

He throws a longing look over his shoulder at Heero, rinsing suds off his back.

Only one more month. What happens when tour ends? Duo doesn't want to leave things like this. He doesn't want to leave at all.

A few minutes later he picks a sink at the other end of the bath house, to brush his teeth.

Follander joins him on his right, fussing with his damp hair and making faces at himself as he compliments his own, "handsome" face, baiting the others into engaging him. Then he interjects, prodding Duo in the ribs to get his attention: "We're gonna watch a movie. Wanna join?"

"Which movie?" He asks with a mouth full of toothpaste.

"Who knows?" He chuckles. "We put all the DVD's in the wrong cases and then have Lindsey pick one."

"Yeah, sure." He bends forward and rinses out his mouth. Someone takes up the sink on his left and it's not until Duo straightens up that he notices it is Heero and it's the closest they've been in days, aside from sleeping only a few feet apart. They make eye-contact in the mirror.

"What about you, Purple Heart?"

"Hn?"

"Movie?"

Heero peels his gaze away from Duo's to look at the Private as he says: "No. I'm tired. I'm going to bed." Then he shoots Duo another look and Duo wants to think it means something – an invitation – but he can't be sure.

Duo is startled by Follander prodding him again.

"You ready? Let's go, man." The other guys were also waiting to head to the Rec Hall.

"Yep. Coming." He stuffs his things back into his toiletry bag and takes it with him, throwing one last, quizzical look over his shoulder at the Corporal, not knowing what to think. He doesn't want to embarrass himself and cause further tension by reading too much into something. So he errs on the side of caution and follows the group to the Rec Hall where he lets the others fight for the best spot on the couch as he already starts gathering plastic chairs around the television for himself and the rest of the guys who won't be able to claim a seat on the couch.

Ten minutes into the movie and he can't focus. He's not even aware of which movie is playing, in spite of the rumbling laughter that erupted at the title screen, indicating it's a very different kind of movie than the horror flick Lindsey thought he had chosen, based on the case.

He thinks about Heero and can't shake the thought that he might be waiting for him and that Duo is missing out on something a lot better than a dumb movie the guys keep talking through anyway. He sits slouched on the chair, with an arm draped over his stomach. He scratches thoughtlessly at his shirt, eliciting pleasant tingles in his body. He licks his lips and can still feel Heero's kiss there. He closes his eyes and enjoys the fantasy – only it's much better than just a fantasy; it's a memory. His other hand is resting on his thigh and he inches it higher, but not high enough, still aware that he is not alone.

"You asleep over there, brother?" Chapple probes.

Duo blinks his eyes open to find all of them staring at him. "No… sorry… Turns out I'm more wiped out that I thought I was." He smiles sheepishly and raises himself out of his seat. "I think I'd better crash."

"Yeah, go. Before we get stuck having to carry your sleeping ass to your bed."

"Go snore somewhere else, old man."

Duo laughs at them and stays just long enough to see them all return their attention to the movie. Then, he turns away and walks to his barrack. The door and shutters are closed, but he can tell that the lights are off inside – if they were on, he'd be able to see light coming through the cracks. His pace slows. Did he keep Heero waiting too long? Had he even been waiting at all? Feeling awkward and self-conscious, he considers going back to the Rec Hall, but he can't without drawing suspicion.

He opens the door as quietly as he can and he can see nothing. But then he hears movement and the light on the bedside table is switched on.

Heero sits up on the edge of Duo's cot. He had been lying there, in Duo's bed.

He had been waiting.

Duo's heartrate starts to thunder. He feels shy, all of a sudden, with Heero's piercing gaze on him. "… I wasn't sure if-…" He snaps his mouth shut as Heero gets up and closes the distance between them. The Japanese-American slams him back against the closed door and then leans his entire body into him and plants a kiss on his sealed lips. Duo doesn't even have time to respond because Heero pulls back again.

"I needed some time to think," Heero discloses.

"Oh?"

"… I've decided that I don't need to be drunk."

He swallows. "Oh."

"Do you-"

He cuts him off: " _Definitely not_." He circles his arms around Heero's slender waist and pulls him back against him. This time, they are both prepared for the kiss and their lips meet like long-time dance partners; knowing precisely how to move together. Heero locks his arms around Duo's shoulders and pushes himself up on the tips of his toes so Duo doesn't have to keep his head dipped down as far. But Duo has a better idea to put them on the same level. He lowers his hands to Heero's ass, squeezing them tightly and pulling him up from the ground while simultaneously spinning them around so he can secure Heero's raised body between the door and himself. The Corporal gasps into his mouth and reactively directs his legs around Duo's hips.

When Duo shifts his hips, it creates wonderful friction between them that has them both moaning.

Not until he is confident they have both had plenty of time to plunder each other's mouth, he walks backwards into the room, being mindful of his balance, since Heero is a bit heavier than the girls he is used to carrying like this and he gingerly sits down on his cot, with Heero in his lap. They take turns stripping off their shirts and pawing at each other's pecs and biceps before they scramble off the bed to take off their trousers and underwear as well.

They stand there, naked, looking at each other with apparent uncertainty about how to proceed. Duo feels a relief of tension when Heero lets out a sheepish chuckle and he offers a silly smile of his own.

"I should, probably, get on the bottom…" Heero says awkwardly, motioning at the narrow bed. "Missionary is probably easiest, right?"

"Uhh… yeah, I guess. Whatever you want."

Heero first arranges the sheets and then lies down on top of them, on his back. He takes a deep breath and can't meet Duo's gaze as he spreads his legs to make room for him. Duo doesn't know what to say that will put Heero – or himself – at ease, so he silently climbs on top of him and lays down between his parted thighs. When their erections meet, that awkwardness melts away and they kiss again.

Duo props the weight of his upper body up on one arm and with his other hand he strokes them together. He kisses Heero's face and neck before impatiently licking into his mouth again. Heero has one hand clasped around the back of Duo's neck and the other is moving gently up and down his side. The touch is almost ticklish, but it causes the most delicious shivers to run up and down his body.

"We should probably turn the light off. The guys think we're sleeping," Duo suggests. If they happen to walk between the barracks and see the light coming through the cracks, they might barge in intending to drag them back to the Rec Hall, if they aren't as tired as they both claimed to be.

Heero nods.

He reaches for the light and as he does, he spots a bottle of all-natural coconut lotion on the corner of the table, that Heero had obviously put there in preparation. Duo didn't know where he got it from or if it would even be suitable to use as lube, but he trusted Heero to have done his research.

After switching the light off, they are both blind in the darkness, but it only made every contact between their bodies more intense. They take their time, both apprehensive, but eventually Heero pulls his knees up to his chest and Duo gropes his surroundings until he finds the bottle. He pumps a good amount of it out onto his hand and spreads it over his cock.

"Use your fingers first," Heero breaths.

He trails his slick hand down the inside of Heero's thigh and searches for his opening. He is so worried about hurting the other than he doesn't even dare to press the first finger in until Heero encourages him. It's hot and tight, even around just one finger. He works it in and out until he feels the channel relax and then inserts a second digit to help stretch him.

"It's fine. It's fine. Just do it," Heero tells him in a hurried whisper.

He takes out his fingers and leans his hips forward, aiming his cock. He doesn't find the opening right away, but when he does, it takes some pressure to be able to push inside.

Heero lets out a long whine and Duo doesn't ask him if he's okay; he trusts his friend to tell him to stop if that's what he needs.

He slowly sinks his entire length into him. The channel is tightest the first few inches in and then becomes more accommodating – welcoming even.

"Ah! Oh…" Heero tenses up and scratches his fingernails along Duo's back.

Duo struggles to hold still when his entire body is urging him to move and suppressing that instinct causes every atom of his being to vibrate with pent-up energy. He thinks to distract him with a kiss but his lips land on an eyebrow as Heero holds his head tilted. He finds his way to his mouth and captures it in a kiss. Their tongues move sensually, but soon they both become impatient and it is Heero who breaks the kiss with a frustrated growl.

"Move. Please, move."

"Move as in 'get out' or-?"

"Move as in: fuck me. Ohh, God, _fuck me_ ," Heero groans.

He rocks his hips gingerly at first, drawing moans from the two of them. After thirteen months without sex, Duo was prepared for it being intense, but he wasn't ready for this. He has his mouth open and every breath is a sound of pleasure. Heero has his thighs clamped around his waist and his ankles locked behind the small of his back. Heero's hands brush through Duo's hair and graze down his neck and over his shoulders, leaving goosebumps and shivers everywhere they go. Sometimes, his fingers dig into his flesh and Duo marvels at how much stronger his partner is than anyone he has ever been with before. Heero's nails leave crescent shapes in his skin that sting even after his hands have restlessly relocated and Duo might find bruises in the morning, but he loves it. He loves the rawness: it's impolite and rough.

"Nnn… Ah!"

"Does it hurt?" Duo asks when Heero lets out a strangled cry.

"Yes."

"But does it feel good, also?"

"Yes. Yes!"

He leans down for another kiss, this time finding Heero's lips on the first try. It's too dark to see his lips or his eyes, but he can feel him; feel his body and his hot breath on his face. He feels one with him – there is no ending to one body and the beginning of another. They blend together. He has never felt more connected to anyone in his entire life. Their bodies uniting strengthens the bond that already tied them together. Duo is hesitant to conclude he's in love, because he has never even considered the possibility that he's gay and capable of falling in love with another man, but Heero has always been special to him – _more_ than a brother, like the other guys – and the term "soulmate" springs to mind: beyond gender and sexual orientation.

It doesn't freak him out, it doesn't frighten him, instead it blankets him with a sense of calm and peace that makes the pleasure that much more pronounced.

Driven by lust and a need to make quick work of their orgasms, Duo sits up. He holds one of Heero's legs in the crook of his elbow and redirects the other over his shoulder. With more leverage in his seated position, he can add more power to his thrusts. In rhythm with their moans and gasps he can hear the wet sounds of his own length pounding into the slick channel and Heero's hand pumping up and down his own erection. The cot creaks dangerously under the rocking weight, but it holds.

There is a sharp, shocked intake of breath. Heero warns: "Duo, I'm gonna-…" He doesn't finish his sentence and lets out a cry instead and his intimate muscles tighten around Duo's cock, indicating his climax. He's always been silent during his release, but it seems he couldn't keep quiet this time. After the initial cry, he moans his way through it. The sounds are low and deep and the hottest thing Duo has ever heard.

He snaps his hips forcefully, chasing his own release, and it doesn't take long. He comes inside of the other man and for the first time since switching off the lights, he sees something – he sees white-hot stars.

Duo slips his cock out and collapses on top of him, and Heero's legs fall bonelessly out to the side. The stickiness between their stomachs is evidence of Heero's release. Duo has his nose nuzzled into the juncture of his neck and shoulder and breathes in the Corporal's sweat and the scent of the same shampoo that everyone on base uses, but somehow smells best on him.

There is no telling how much time has passed when Heero states gruffly: "You have to let me get up."

"Hmmm… Why?" He whines. He's perfectly content lying on top of him and Heero is a tough guy, he can handle a bit of weight on him.

"It's messy."

He grins sloppily and wiggles, feeling the slickness between them. "Yeah, it is." Still, he makes no more to get up. He kind of likes how messy it is. It's unapologetic and honest.

"Not just that… Your come is leaking out of me and onto your sheets."

Duo scrunches up his face. "Shit." Reluctantly, he disentangles himself from his lover and stands up on shaky feet, hoisting Heero up with him in one swift pull.

The light is flicked on and Duo squints at the unexpected brightness of it. He watches Heero get a washcloth that he had smuggled with him in his toiletry bag and pours some water from a bottle into it. He uses it to wipe himself clean and then lets Duo use the other side of it to clean himself off as well. Then, the washcloth is tossed into a corner and they wordlessly step into fresh underwear and Heero puts on one of the white night shirts as well, before crawling back into his own bed.

Duo sits down on the edge of his cot, resting his elbows on his knees. He stares at his friend unabashedly. He doesn't want to pretend that it didn't happen, like they always do after jerking off, so he says: "I really liked that."

Heero turns his head to meet his gaze. "I did too."

He wrings his hands together. He wants to say more and almost blurts out feelings that he hasn't even sorted out for himself yet. "It was better than it should have been."

Heero frowns.

"I mean… It was better than 'just sex'. Right?"

His friend swallows, then agrees with strained voice: "Yeah."

Duo smiles, feeling instantly lighter. A warmth spreads in his chest. "So… What does that mean?"

"… I don't know."

He chews on the inside of his cheek. He's not used to Heero not having the answers, but obviously they are both a bit shell shocked at the moment. What all started as the dumbest, most ill-advised interpretation of "exposure therapy", has evolved into something beyond what they were both expecting and prepared for. Duo can have sex – and enjoy sex – without feelings needing to be involved, but not _that_ kind of sex, not that good.

Heero recognizes his conflicted expression and assures him with that deep, calm voice, that always has the power to steady Duo: "We'll figure it out after our tour is over. When we're back in the real world."

He nods in agreement, even if only because it gives him some time to think. Still, he's not looking forward to going back to "the real world" at all. He likes tour. He likes who he _is_ on tour. He likes who he's _with_ on tour.

* * *

 _ **Of course**_ **the most smutty chapter also ends up being the longest… :'D**

 **There will be another small dose of smut after this and then we are going to continue our regularly scheduled programming with the angst and drama.**


	15. Chapter 15

**The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Fifteen**_

Of course Heero ends up incredibly sore and has to explain away his strained movements as a pulled muscle, to avoid scrutiny from the other guys. To let him mend, they don't have sex for a couple of days, although they come unwisely close to throwing caution to the wind, as they jerk off every night, needing the closeness between them more than ever. They don't want to let go of this new energy.

When they have sex again, it's probably too soon, but this time Duo lies prone on his back and Heero sits on top of him, straddling him, so he can set the pace to whatever is comfortable for him.

It's different from last time in another meaningful way as well: they can see each other. It's noon, so it's light outside and the bright beams of the sun pour in through every crack. Because the sun is still out, it's hotter too and they are both sweating profusely, but it feels better to just give in to the heat, rather than fight it.

They are supposed to be sleeping in preparation for their night-op later, but they couldn't sleep. Duo confessed his fingers itched to touch Heero and Heero confessed the same. They didn't plan on having sex, but when Heero whispered in Duo's ear that he wanted it, as they lay naked in Do's be, holding their own arousals, there was no stopping it.

There are beads of sweat on Heero's face. His eyes are closed and his mouth is open, but he tries to keep quiet since it's only their unit that's asleep right night now; the rest of the camp is buzzing with activity. He doesn't know what to do with his hands. He touches his nipples first, but it seems like that is too intense – he's purposefully avoiding his erection too, letting it bounce up and down with his movements – so he buries the fingers of one hand into his dark and damp hair and reaches the other back and clamps it around Duo's pale thigh.

Duo has his hands on Heero's hips, his fingers flex as his body is overwhelmed with the intensity of the energy between them, causing him to squeeze the flesh and the hard hipbones, but he tries not to interfere with his rhythm. He moves to lay a splayed hand over Heero's abdomen, feeling the contraction in the tense muscles. He has a tightness in his own stomach too. They are both on the edge and he doesn't even remember how they got there so easily. "Ohh, yeah, baby…" He lets slip and his face goes red but Heero doesn't even react to the nickname. The Japanese-American has his head thrown back at this point and leaning back on the arm behind him; completely lost in pleasure. "You ride that cock, baby," he encourages boldly.

Heero does react this time: he clenches his intimate muscles tighter around Duo and lets out the first very-not-quiet moan. Heero slows the pace and rolls his hips differently, every movement draws an increasingly more pitched gasp out of him.

Duo imagines his partner has found a way to get the cock inside of him right on the mark to stimulate his prostate. "You like being in control?"

Heero groans before he says: "I don't feel in control." He looks at Duo with dark, passionate eyes that have Duo biting down on his own lip. "I feel like I'm addicted to you," the Corporal breathes, "and I can't _not_ give in."

"Come here." Duo drags his hands higher up Heero's body and cups his face to pull him down for a kiss. The kiss is wet and sloppy and Duo realizes Heero is right, there is no control – neither of them is in control of this thing; it's in control of them… and he loves it.

With his impending orgasm making itself known, he wraps a hand around Heero's arousal and tugs insistently.

"Don't. I'm close," Heero grounds out against his mouth.

"Me too, babe. Me too." He digs his heels into the cot and thrusts his hips up to meet Heero's movements. They keep kissing because preoccupying their mouths is the only way to keep quiet. But then Heero breaks the kiss and buries his nose into the pillow, next to Duo's head, to muffle an honest-to-God scream that sounds a lot like Duo's name. His come spills between them and when his channel gets impossibly tight, Duo follows him into bliss. He envelopes Heero in his arms and holds him tightly.

When Duo comes down from his high, he chuckles lightly and his hands slip off Heero's back and fall limply to his sides.

Heero gets up, always keeping his hand on something to steady himself. He finds his sleep shirt and uses it to clean them both up, since he hadn't had the forethought to bring a washcloth this time. Afterwards, he doesn't get in his own bed, he orders Duo to make room for him and even though the two grown men barely fit together on the narrow cot, he makes it happen, directing Duo's arm over his waist to hold him in place and tucking his head under Duo's chin.

It's probably too hot for them to be cuddling, but Duo welcomes it anyway. He nuzzles his nose in Heero's chocolate brown hair, not caring that it's damp. He smells of sweat and sex – faint traces of coconut from the oil that, as it turns out, works wonderfully as lube. With a stupid grin that Heero can't see, he jests: "I'm going to get hard every time I smell coconuts from now on."

Heero just lets out a hum and Duo can feel it vibrate in his chest.

"I like this," he confesses seriously, adjusting his arms around the body that rests against him.

"I like you," Heero responds reactively and Duo wonders if Heero misheard what Duo said, or vice versa, or if he meant to go out on a limb like that with such a confession, however offhanded he had made it sound. And then he is left to ponder what that even means, "I _like_ you". Of course they like each other, they are BSF's and joined-at-the-hip, as Follander would say. However, they had never actually said those words, since it seemed silly and unnecessary to say, but now that Heero has said it, there _is_ a deep meaning to it, Duo realizes.

Before he figures out how to best respond, it is apparent that Heero has fallen asleep in his arms.

They did agree that they would leave the worrying for _after_ _tour_ , so Duo pushes the mess of thoughts to the back of his head. He wants to enjoy the moment and the last few weeks of tour and what they might bring, because who knows what is going to happen _after tour_ : back in the real world where they are different people, surrounded by different people, and living on opposites coasts for that matter.

He closes his eyes and welcomes a dreamless sleep. It's been a long time since he had one of those nightmares in which he loses Heero but even with Heero sharing his bed with him, closer than ever, those nightmares are lurking.

* * *

 **Ready for the angst?**


	16. Chapter 16

**Author's note:**

 **It doesn't seem right posting a chapter for a silly story with the things going on in the world. And it feels downright wrong that's it's an angsty chapter, since I'd prefer to spread some happiness. But the only power I have over the situation is to limit the attacks on peoples' lives to the then and there and not letting the effect spread. Even though that's hard, because nowadays there is something to weep for happening every day; it's not "incidents" anymore. Hasn't been for a long time.**

 **Charlottesville and Barcelona are symptoms of the same disease: ignorance. There is no system-wide cure for that. We all have to take our own responsibilities as individuals and cure ourselves, rather than letting this infection spread. If we remain strong together, we will outlast the people who refuse to change - the people who allow this ignorance to fester – and this gaping wound will close to a papercut. It will never be gone, it will always hurt, but it won't kill us.**

 **Understand as you wish to be understood.**

 **Love as you wish to be loved.**

 **Stay strong. Stay safe.**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Sixteen**_

With only two weeks left on tour, he makes use of the internet café for the last time to chat with friends on Facebooks and he smiles at them dropping hints about throwing him a welcome-back party and then he calls his mother and keeps her talking so he runs out of time, leaving him an excuse to not call his girlfriend again.

Of course, keeping his mother talking means that she brings her up eventually.

"Hilde says you haven't been calling her much the past couple of months," she notes with that tone of voice everyone knows from their mother; disapproving and concerned at the same time. "Last she heard of you was an email four weeks ago."

He sighs and it crackles in the receiver. "We just don't have much to talk about, with me being here and her over there."

"You're not making much sense, honey. Wouldn't you have that problem with everyone you call? You don't seem to be avoiding Quatre for this reason. Or me."

"You and Quatre are easy to talk to. Or rather," he chuckles, "you talk easy, so you're easy for me to just listen to. Hilde… Hilde asks a lot of questions." He makes a face. That wasn't entirely true. Just like everyone else, she asks him how he's doing and stuff like that, the problem lies with him. The problem is that he has been cheating on her, with a _man_ , with his _friend_. It doesn't help his guilt that he checked out of the relationship a long time ago and was waiting for the right opportunity to let her down gently.

"I'm sure everything will be fine between the two of you once you get back home," his mother assures him, misinterpreting the issue, but that was for the better. "It's difficult being away from family but I know it's even more challenging maintaining a romantic relationship while you're so far away from each other."

She does know, she went through the same thing with dad. Duo doesn't exactly consider them a success story – his parents have always been cold and distant to each other, if there ever was a spark, it's been long gone – so he doesn't know how to respond and he just lets the silence be until she speaks up again.

"How's Hero?" She inquires, sensing he would rather talk about something else and mercifully playing along.

He smiles. As long as two tours he has been telling her about Heero and she still mispronounces his name. He's become convinced she's doing it on purpose, either because the mispronunciation makes sense, considering Heero _is_ a hero, about to be decorated with a Silver Star after all, or if it's out of spite, because she's never been given the chance to meet this incredibly person he keeps mentioning, who saved his life and everyone else's. "He's…" hot, sexy, funny, brave, caring, witty, excellent in bed… "…great."

"Tell him I'm counting on him to keep you safe for two more weeks."

He snorts, amused by her motherly overprotectiveness. "I'll let him know, so he won't slack off on the job."

"Are you ever going to introduce him to your mother?"

He rolls his eyes at her tone. _Out of spite it is_ , he surmises. He wants to say that he'd love for her to meet him, but them grimaces and reconsiders. Meeting the mother has become a loaded and complicated thing in light of what is happening between them, that they have yet to figure out and put a label on. "He lives in California, mom."

"I'm pretty sure there is this invention that they call an 'airplane'. I heard it somewhere… from the Wright brothers, I believe."

He laughs at her sarcasm. "I'm sure when he's home he's just happy to be home. He's not going to be flying across the country to meet my mother."

"Maybe I should come with you to his Silver Star ceremony, then."

 _Oh._

"You are going, right?"

"Of course, but… why would you?"

"If not for him, they would have sent you back to me a long time ago Duo, in a cedar casket. I want to look this man in the eyes and thank him."

He smiles, recognizing the emotion in her voice.

A hand lands on his shoulder and when he looks up one of the techs informs him: "Time's up, Lance Corporal. Sorry."

He nods and mouths: "It's fine." He breaks the news to his mother that he has to hang up. They say their goodbyes and she makes him promise again to stay alert and stay safe. "I'll see you in two weeks, mom," he asserts confidently and that makes her feel better. He disconnects the phone and walks out with his hands in his pockets and his heart in his throat.

They were supposed to have the evening off and Duo and Heero and a handful of the rest of the guys were in the Rec Hall when their Staff Sergeant came to collect them. One of the other teams wouldn't be arriving back on base for several more hours, due to an unforeseen delay in their operation to Zarghun Shahr. They wouldn't be back in time for their scheduled evening patrol, so another unit had to step in. They drew the short straw.

Everyone gathers in their fatigues at the equipment building. Follander heaves dramatic sighs as he routinely checks and repacks his gear, while the other men wallow in quiet resignation. It's a six hour walk from Camp Sharana to the village of Terwa in the North. They have to check the road for explosives; they had been sweeping the infrastructure in the area for the past two months, finding a record number of IED's. Luckily, once they have cleared the road, they can drive back and that will only take them forty minutes, but they will still be gone until sunrise and none of them are looking forward to it, considering they had just finished a long shift of drills and inventory.

"Look alive - stay alive, ladies," the Staff Sergeant barks as he rounds them up and directs them to their positions around the three Humvees they will accompany – and which will drive them back to camp after the long trek. "When you see the sun at the horizon, it will be the start of day 411 and there will only be thirteen more to go before you can go home."

His remark seems to lift some spirits, but Duo shoots a look Heero's way before casting his gaze down at his boots.

The caravan hits the road, inching along it in formation. The three Humvees are lined up, with enough space between them to fit another car. Lindsey and Flint are at the front-right and Chapple and Medina are front-left; the two pairs are walking a few steps ahead of the first vehicle. One of each pair has his eyes trained on the road, the other keeps an eye on their surroundings, with their rifle held to their chest. The next two pairs walk a few steps ahead of the second vehicle, doing the same, but paying more attention to the bank on either side of the road. A final pair walks at the very back of the caravan, providing cover from behind.

Duo and Heero are paired up, they walk to the right of the front bumper of the second car. Duo is closest to the car, with his eyes trained on the horizon. Heero edges along the bank, searching the dirt.

Since the Taliban is catching on that the military likes to travel off road to avoid traps, they have taken to placing IED's a few yards on either side of the road, hoping to hit them that way. Unfortunately, that mostly just means they get locals traveling by horse or camel, or by foot instead, or the accompanying cattle that they herd back and forth.

The sun is already below the horizon and the last of the light is blood orange. Dark shadows appear in the hilly landscape to the East; dark shadows in which anyone could hide.

Duo is alert – more like high-strung. It is always the case for him that the closer he gets to the end of tour, the more nervous he becomes. He's made it this far, he doesn't want to screw things up and get killed – or get people killed – with only a few days left before shipping home.

Heero feels his tension and offhandedly tells him to relax.

Duo snorts. "Yeah, thanks, I can just _do_ that, because you tell me to."

The Corporal doesn't take his eyes off the ground; he can't, or he would have scowled at Duo for sure.

As the darkness settles, the Humvees turn on the headlights and the floodlights on top of the roofs. It's necessary for them to be able to scan the road, but Duo feels antsy. The caravan is a beacon of light in the black desert, they can be seen from miles away. They are exposed with no hope for cover. He still remembers very well the last time they were walking alongside a car and shit hit the fan.

"Did you call your mom?" Heero inquires.

He smiles, knowing Heero is trying to distract him and he appreciates it. "Yeah."

"Any news?"

He thought for a moment, rerunning the long, mostly meaningless conversation he had with her. "…She wants to come to your ceremony." He watches Heero and notes that the man suppresses the urge to look up at him in surprise.

"She knows it's in San Diego, right?"

"She sure does. She _really_ wants to meet you."

"Oh… Why? What did you tell her?" He lowers his voice, even though the others can't hear them anyway, over the sound of the engines and their own chatter to kill the time.

"Nothing," he hurries to say, knowing what he was asking, although the answer doesn't seem to alleviate any of the tension in Heero's shoulders. Of course he didn't tell her that they are… That they are what? The only word he has for it at the moment is "lovers", in the most undefined way, and he definitely didn't tell his mother that. "Just that you saved my ass a few months back and got shot to pieces in the process. She wants to thank you, in person."

"I didn't do it just to save you. I did it for the whole unit."

"I know. She does too. So, is okay if she tags along with me?"

"Of course. But, you don't have to come if you don't want to."

Duo playfully hits his shoulder. "I want to, you jackass. Of course I want to." He grins at him, even though Heero can't see. "Someone has to be there to keep everything from going to your head." He feels better when he catches Heero's smile.

"…You know, if you're flying out anyway… you might as well stay a couple of days."

That idea is both exciting and nerve-wracking. He definitely wants to see Heero for more than just a day after tour was over – so they can enjoy each other the way they have been – but they also have a lot to figure out and that makes him nervous, like knowing there is a test coming up that he can't study for. "Yeah, sure. That'd be nice. Have to find a way to get rid of my mom, though." He flashes another smirk.

After what felt like six hours already, he checks his watch to discover with a grimace that they're only halfway. Maintaining focus is exhausting. He keeps scanning the darkness, all he can do is look for lights that give away a possible insurgents' approach, but he sees nothing and after a few hours it is becoming disorienting. Heero doesn't have it any easier, with his gaze trained on the dirt. Every rock and hump of sand looks like something else, especially with the way the lights from the Humvees cast sharp shadows around everything.

Everyone goes quiet, too tired to keep talking and joking. The rumbling of the three engines and the crunching of the wheels and their own boots in the sand are the only sounds to fill the silence. Duo tries to pay attention to everything, listening for different sounds, like trucks in the distance. Every sputter of the Humvee next to him has him tightening his fingers around the handle and the barrel of his rifle. The false alarms keep triggering him.

He makes sure to drink plenty of water and reminds Heero as well.

They stop once so everyone can take a piss and then continue on.

He thinks about the end of tour and going home. He knows that once he is home, he will be happy to see his family and friends again, but right now he mostly dreads it. He'd feel better knowing when he will deploy next, although it's uncertain if he even will. After three tours, it becomes more challenging to get cleared to be sent back out. The Marine Corps is becoming hesitant of sending men out to war too often for too long, with the way PTSD is running rampant among Veterans. If he'd be completely honest with the shrink who will evaluate him, he probably won't see another tour in Afghanistan. If he owns up to feeling more at home on a Forward Operating Base in a warzone than he does in New York with his family, he is bound to set off some textbook alarms on maladjustment and codependency. He might get stationed on a military base Stateside instead. The entire unit lives scattered throughout the states, so he likely won't end up on the same base as any of the guys he considers his brothers, especially not Heero.

If that happens, they can't escape back to this time and place, where they are free from the complications of "the real world"; free to indulge in this _thing_ between them that means so much to Duo without even knowing _what_ it means and without it having any consequences in "the real world".

Duo always likes keeping his war-life separate from his home-life, but if he wants to hang on to Heero and further explore what they have, he has to blend the two and that is daunting.

He wonders how Heero feels about all of this, but is hesitant to ask. He is curious and it might help knowing his friend's thought-process and emotions on the matter, but he is reluctant to start that conversation before knowing where he himself stands.

He throws his gaze up ahead. He can't see much of the road, only a few yards are illuminated, but he knows it stretches far ahead and he resents being alone with his thoughts for the rest of the way and wishes something would distract him from himself.

Just as that thought pops into his head, he sees something glint on the dirt road about a yard in front of the first Humvee. Something catches the light before it disappears in the shadow under the front right bumper. In a split second Duo knows – just _knows_ – what it is. Lindsey should have seen it, but he didn't. They keep walking and the Humvee rolls on.

"STOP!" Duo screams.

It's too late.

The right front tire of the Humvee rolls over the IED and sets off the explosive. There is a bright flash of light. The force of the explosion rocks the armored vehicle and throws Lindsey and Flint to the side like ragdolls.

Duo doesn't think, he just reacts. He twists to stand in front of Heero, turning his back to the explosion. All he sees are Heero's wide, blue eyes as he stands closely in front of him, shielding him with his body. Duo feels pinpricks all along the back of his legs and arms and his brain doesn't even have time to register the pain as it is pieces of shrapnel imbedding into his flesh. Some kind of projectile collides with his shoulder and another connects with the back of his head. His vest and helmet prove their worth as they catch both, although it hurts like Hell. The force of it is powerful enough to throw him forward, having him crash into his partner. The lip on the front of his helmet clips Heero's nose as Duo falls on top of him, but Duo is out cold before they hit the ground.

* * *

 **I'm sorry.**


	17. Chapter 17

**The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Seventeen**_

Maybe it's the splitting headache that wakes him up. Or maybe because his shoulder hurts like a bitch. Or maybe it's Heero shouting at him like he offended him.

"You stupid motherfucker! Yeah, you _better_ be fucking waking up, you asswipe!"

"Is that really helpful?" Someone counters, but with an amused tone.

"…It really isn't," Duo croaks. He squints his eyes as he tries to open them.

There is a sharp intake of breath and then a moment of silence. It doesn't last long. "Tough shit, dickwad," Heero retorts, but in spite of his words, he sounds less angry now that it is apparent Duo is coming to.

The Lance Corporal groans. His head is throbbing and he feels sharp pains on his legs, ass and arms. He is lying on his stomach on a bed at Camp Sharana's Trauma Center. He is completely undressed and he winces whenever one of the points in his flesh hurts more all of a sudden.

"Lay still," a medic instructs, with the same voice he heard earlier.

Duo hears the metallic sound of instruments and then the pain flares in a spot on the back of his upper thigh, causing him to tense up. He manages to open his eyes. He has his head turned to the side, resting heavily on his left cheek. The first thing he sees is Heero's face, close to his. He has dried blood on his upper lip, his nose is discolored and the inner corners of his eye sockets are black and blue. He also sees the medic, standing at his bedside, holding a stainless steel tray and long, thin prongs with which he pokes at him and the digs the pieces of shrapnel out of his flesh. The only thing that makes that pain bearable, is his headache overpowering everything else anyway. He feels groggy and knows he has been given painkillers, but they don't do much it seems.

He shifts his gaze back to Heero, who is crouched by the head of his bed with his fingers gripping the edge. He remembers crashing into the Corporal when the force of the blast threw him forward and the result is plain to see on Heero's face. "Did I break your nose?" He asks remorsefully.

"No. But this makes the second time you almost did, you fuck-twit."

The medic chuckles and then digs the prongs into the sensitive skin of Duo's left butt cheek.

"Ow ow ow!"

"You deserve that," Heero is quick to say, but that biting tone to his voice is all gone now and he can't keep his concern and sympathy from showing in his eyes.

When the pain subsides, Duo jokes: "It's only fair that I get the pain in my ass for once."

Heero widens his eyes at the careless joke and scrambles to cover it up. "Yeah, after you've always been a pain in my ass."

He yelps again when the medic has to dig a little deeper. "Are you almost done back there?" He barks.

"Almost. You're lucky they didn't go too deep, and that your vest stopped them. It would have been worse if they had been all in your back as well."

"It's your own damn fault. You could have gone for cover behind the car," Heero tells him.

"And then it would have been you lying here, getting shrapnel fished out of your dick."

"Nooo, not quite," the medic drawls. He finishes up with the prongs and sets it and the metal tray with shrapnel aside. Before he gets to work on bandaging all of the small wounds, he grabs Duo's helmet and holds it out for him to see as he says: "Corporal Yuy would have been lying in the morgue if you hadn't stepped in front of him." The medic sends a look Heero's way.

Duo looks at the helmet held in front of him with tired eyes. The piece of shrapnel that hit him in the back of the head is still embedded in it. It's a diamond-shaped, metal plate, from the bumper of the armored Humvee, about the size of an A4 piece of paper. It has warped and is rippled at the point where it is stuck in the back of the helmet. The sharp point is imbedded in the lower rim – an inch lower and it would have passed between his helmet and the high collar of his Kevlar vest and it might have decapitated him, considering its size and the speed with which it hit him. But the scariest realization is that the medic is right. If Duo hadn't instinctively stepped in front of Heero to shield him, the metal plate would have hit him in the face and would have likely pierced right through him and into his brain.

All of a sudden, he doesn't feel tired anymore. His heart starts to race at the thought of how close he came to losing his friend – _again_. He flits his gaze up at Heero, at his perfect face and his kind eyes, even though he is trying to keep up the indignant and angry act.

"Corporal Yuy owes you a thank you," the medic concludes. He puts away the helmet and reaches for the bandages and antiseptic and gets to work on dressing the numerous small wounds.

Heero snorts. "Oh please, he just did it so he'll finally get his own Purple Heart. Just so you know, they don't hand out Silver Stars for doing a pretty pirouette."

Duo ignores his attempt at sarcasm and doesn't care what the medic might think, he grabs Heero's hand and holds onto it tightly. Feeling him is the only way he can get himself to control his breathing and calm down his heartrate. Heero lets him hold it and Duo is grateful. He can't tear his gaze away from Heero's eyes.

Not until a few minutes later, when the medic is nearly done tending to him, does Duo come out of his shock and does he think to ask: "What about the others? What about Lindsey?"

"He's in bad shape but he's going to make it. They are flying him back to the States tonight. Flint too. The Humvee caught the worst of it, but the Staff and the driver are fine. Chapple and Medina got lucky with just a few scrapes."

The medic catches him up on his own status: "As you can tell, you got hit by a lot of shrapnel. But you also suffered a serious concussion when that piece impacted with your helmet. And the wheel came off the Humvee and skimmed past your left shoulder, dislocating it."

"Ah, so that's what that is." He wiggles the fingers of his left hand, which gives more focus to the pain in his immobilized shoulder.

"But you are going to make a full recovery, Lance Corporal," the medic assures him.

"That's good."

The medic adds: "They are flying you out of here with Lindsey and Flint tonight."

His eyes widen. "Wait, what?" He looks at Heero, noting his forlorn expression. "They're flying me home? Why?"

The medic scoffs. "You can't stay here, Lance Corporal. You are injured and you need to recover."

"But- but there is only two weeks left!" He objects.

"Exactly, so there is no point keeping you here. By the time your left arm is functional, your tour is up and you'll be going home anyway."

"Wha-?" The news completely catches him off guards and disorients him. "What about the rest of the unit?" He asks Heero.

"We'll be home in two weeks."

His heart drops at having the last two weeks of tour – the last two weeks with Heero – stolen from him. "But the unit will be three men down!"

"We'll reinforce the other teams."

"I don't want to leave," he states resolutely. "I'm not leaving."

"That's not your decision to make," Heero argues, "it's the Gunnery Sergeant's, and he has made up his mind. They have to charter a flight for Lindsey and Flint anyway, so it's easy getting you out of here along with them."

Duo grips Heero's hand more tightly. "What about you, though? You're-… you're injured too!" He looks pointedly at the bruised nose and inner eye-sockets. He squeezes Heero's hand ever tighter.

"A little booboo on my face is no reason to be sent home, Duo. I'll be fine." He pulls his hand away and Duo imagines that his distress is drawing suspicion, but he can't help it.

He likes the thought of leaving Heero behind least of all. It is more apparent than ever that he needs to be around to protect his friend. If Duo hadn't been by his side, Heero would be dead right now! But the Corporal was right: it's not his decision and there is no point to wasting energy trying to fight the Gunnery on this. Keeping him on base would only be a burden; with his arm immobilized, he has nothing to offer to make his stay worthwhile. He'd be someone they need to protect, should another attack come and that kind of effort can't be spared.

Heero leaves him alone so Duo can get more rest and the medic gives him a shot that puts him back to sleep for a few hours.

Before leaving the med bay later that afternoon, he goes to visit Lindsey and Flint first. Duo's left arm is in a sling and his entire body hurts as he walks, but he's mobile and he realizes just how lucky he is when he sees the state his fallen comrades are in.

Flint looks relatively well, all things considered, and he sports a lopsided smile when Duo walks up to his bed. His words are slurred as the soldier is high on pain medication, but in the thankful absence of pain, he is in good spirits. He has four broken ribs on his left side and a broken femur, from a big piece of shrapnel cutting into his leg, right down to the bone. He is severely burned from the tips of his fingers up to the side of his neck and the doctors at Bethesda will have their work cut out for them to save the functionality of his arm, considering the nerve damage he sustained. Flint is too high to fully grasp the severity of his injuries and looks more worried about Duo instead, and he apologizes because he feels responsible. Him and Lindsey should have seen the IED in time.

"Don't worry about it." He lays a comforting hand on his chest and then moves to the other bed, where Lindsey is being kept in a medical coma.

The youngest soldier of the unit looks unrecognizable. His blond hair is black with soot and his eyebrows have been singed off. One side of his face is covered in bandages, as are both his arms and upper chest. He was closest to the explosion and the fire that licked around itself. He suffered no serious internal injuries, which is a miracle. Being thrown clear from the blast and landing in the sand saved his life, but his burns were extensive and the pain would be unmanageable if he would be conscious to feel it.

"Jesus Christ…" Duo puts a hand on the young man's lower leg and gives a soft squeeze.

He spends a long time standing next to the bed, even though his own body is aching. Sitting down wouldn't be any better anyway, considering he had a medic pluck shrapnel out of his ass only a few hours ago.

He stays until the medical team comes in to get the two bedridden soldiers ready for transport. He knows he would only get in the way and he has to pack in preparation of his own departure anyway.

On his way back to his barrack, everyone he runs into expresses their sympathy, tells him that they are going to miss him and wish him well. He offers a half-smile in return. It's the end of an era when he is not ready for it to end yet.

The door to the barrack is open and he shuffles inside. The sheets are already gone from his bed and on top of his cot sits his duffel bag instead. Heero is working on piling Duo's few belongings into it and he looks up when he becomes aware of his presence.

Duo knows Heero only means to help, but he doesn't like the idea of the Corporal literally helping to get him out of there. Although there is nothing else for the man to do, he can't fight the Gunnery Sergeant on this either. They have no choice but to resign.

"You okay?" The Japanese-American soldier asks after the silence extends between them for a long time.

Duo purses his lips as he refuses to cry, but he admits: "No." He doesn't like the way his voice cracks. "I went to see Flint and Lindsey…" In spite of his best efforts to keep his emotions in check, he fails and he breaks out in tears. He brings up his right hand and sobs into his palm.

Heero crosses the distance between them and pulls him into a gentle hug, careful not to aggravate his injuries.

Duo dips his head down and presses his nose into Heero's shoulder. He wraps his one good arm around him and twists the fingers into the shirt at his back.

"It's okay," Heero whispers and he tightens his hold on Duo, clinging to him as the emotions hit him as well.

"God, this tour is so fucked up…" he breathes against Heero's neck. "Somehow it is both the best and the worst tour ever… How does that even make sense?" He chuckles bitterly.

"It doesn't matter. It's almost over."

"But that's the thing," Duo detaches himself to look Heero in the eyes, "I don't want it to end. How fucked up is that? I- I'm not ready to leave. I don't want to leave, I want to stay here," he rambles.

"I don't want you to stay," Heero says point blank, startling Duo.

His face twists into a hurt expression. "Why?"

"I'm relieved you're going home. You'll be safe," Heero explains, putting Duo at ease after the misunderstanding.

"Heero, I-"

The other doesn't let him finish and hisses: "Do you have any idea how scary that was, not knowing if you were going to be okay? What was I supposed to do with myself if you had died to save my life?"

Duo grabs his arm and shakes him. "I _do_ know how scary that is, because I felt the same when you decided to fucking drop-kick a grenade!"

"But I did that to save everyone," Heero argues with strained voice. He tries to keep quiet so no one else will overhear. "I risked trading one life for _seven_ , at least that makes sense. You stepping between me and that explosion makes no sense to me."

"It's not about sense, or fucking math," Duo counters, "it's about me rather dying than reliving that day in Janabad. The nightmares were bad enough, I don't want that to be my reality ever again." He studies the wild look in those blue eyes and challenges: "Tell me you wouldn't do the same for me, now that you know what it's like on the other side."

"…I would," Heero breathes. "Which is why it's good you're going home. At this rate, one of us will end up dead to save the other." He forces on a wry smile.

Duo steels his nerves and says: "I'm going to miss you." It's not enough, but he hasn't figured out the rest yet, so he can't say any more.

Heero nods.

"But we'll see each other in three weeks: at your ceremony."

He nods again.

He pulls his friend into another hug. "If they're going to shack you up with someone else, promise me you won't get as cozy with them as you did with me." It is supposed to be a joke, but voicing the thought makes him seriously possessive all of a sudden. He leans back and cups Heero's chin his hand, making him meet his gaze. He says in all seriousness: "Promise me you're mine."

Heero's lips part in an inaudible gasp. "I promise," he says solemnly.

"I want to hear you say it."

"I'm yours," he readily complies. His words are a mere whisper.

Duo looks over his shoulder out the door to confirm there is no one around to peek into their shadowy barrack and then he leans down to press a kiss to Heero's lips, mindful of his bruised nose. It's very different kiss from what they are used to, because it doesn't serve a greater pleasure. It's just nice and sweet and maybe the most intimate thing they've ever done together. Once they part, Duo moves to his cot, leaving Heero with a confused little frown. The Corporal had already put the box of trinkets Duo kept under his bed into his duffel bag and Duo rummages through it to produce the black beaded bracelet he recovered a while ago. "I want you to have this," he announces and when Heero holds out his hand, Duo slips the elastic bracelet onto his wrist.

"This feels official," Heero notes.

"Good."

They share a self-conscious smile.

Too soon it is time for Duo to go. A plane lands on the airstrip of Camp Sharana, which is a rare sight nowadays, so it draws some commotion. The ramp at the back is lowered down to the tarmac and Duo waits at the base as first the two gurneys are rolled onto the airplane. The entire unit surrounds him. One of the flight crew takes the duffel bag that Heero had been holding and carries it onto the plane.

He says his goodbyes to everyone and does a better job at keeping the situation lighthearted than when he did when he was alone with Heero. He gives his friend one final hug and then follows the crew onto the plane, where he is assigned a seat opposite of where the gurney's are anchored in place. The wounds in his ass protest, but he doesn't make a big deal about it. He grits his teeth and decides to suffer it without complaint.

Duo looks out the back and sees Heero and the rest are still standing there. The wind blows sand around them and pulls at their fatigues. His heart hurts having to leave his brothers behind. He keeps looking at them forlornly until they are ushered away as the plane prepares for take-off. At the very last second, before the ramp closes up, Follander steps onto the plane and he straps himself into a seat a little distance away from Duo.

"What are you doing here?" Duo has to shout to be heard over the engines as they come to life.

"They're sending me home," he answers offhandedly. "Pending a review of my violation of base rules."

"What do you mean?"

Follander motions for him to wait a bit and he doesn't respond until the airplane has taken off and has climbed to cruising altitude, when the shaking has calmed down. "I admitted to the Gunnery Sergeant that I've snuck alcohol onto the base and traded it for favors with others."

Duo frowns at the turn of events. Follander hadn't seemed very guilty about his little trade before and he hadn't expected him to turn himself in, especially this close to the end of tour, when it was apparent he would have gotten away with it if he hadn't owned up to it. "Why?"

The corners of the Private's mouth turn down and he nods at the two beds across from them, where Lindsey and Flint are both kept asleep with medication. "They had been drinking," he says. "That might be why they didn't spot the IED in time."

Duo blinks in shock at the revelation.

"There's no way to ever know for sure, but being midway between drunk and hungover couldn't have helped. I didn't know beforehand, or I would have stepped in - had them reassigned to the back of the caravan, or something. Flint just told me this morning."

He remembers the conversation he had had with Follander during the unit's football game, when the Private refused to tell him who had the last of the alcohol that he had smuggled onto base. Apparently he was protecting Flint and Lindsey from scrutiny, but it ended up backfiring. "You could get discharged for this," Duo points out, as if Follander hadn't already considered that himself when he made the decision to come clean.

"Yeah, maybe," he says despondently. "But maybe three tours has been enough anyway. Especially after this last tour, man…"

Duo nods, in agreement with the sentiment.

"Whatever they decide, it will be the right decision," he continues. "I've been deciding for myself that what I've been doing is okay for way too long and I don't think I can trust my own judgment on this anymore. So I had to hand that decision over to someone else, you know?"

"I think that's a good idea," he says encouragingly.

"I just wish I had done it sooner." He directs his gaze at the men in the bed again.

Duo follows his look and after a thoughtful pause, he says: "It's not your fault; you didn't force anything on them. They made the decision themselves." He looks down at his hands, wringing them in his lap. "And I can't really blame them either, because I know how easy that mistake is to make." He thinks back to the night he and Heero had foolishly gotten drunk and the compound ended up being attacked that night. Lindsey and Flint had made a similar mistake. The unit was supposed to have the night off and if everything had gone according to plan, there would have been no consequences to having a couple of drinks. But nothing ever goes according to plan in a warzone.

Never a dull moment at Camp Sharana.

They stay silent for the rest of the flight and both even fall asleep at some point, in spite of the uncomfortable seats and the turbulence.

The plane touches down in France at a military base for refueling and then crosses the Atlantic, heading straight for Bethesda where the two injured soldiers need to be to be taken care of.

After they land in Florida, Duo and Follander walk shoulder-to-shoulder on their way to their ride to the civilian airport, where they will hop onto a flight to their respective homes. Duo is going to New York and Follander is going to Michigan. At the airport, they both disappear into a stall in the restrooms and emerge wearing everyday clothes, to attract less attention. With their duffel bags slung over their shoulder, they navigate to a little bistro at the airport where they wait for their flight. They still hadn't even exchanged a single word, a little in shock at being back on American soil and back in civilization. Ordering drinks at the bistro feels alien and they finally make eye contact again and smile sheepishly at each other.

The first thing Follander says is: "Hmmm, that's good," after taking the first sip of his coffee. "God, you just forget what coffee is supposed to taste like."

Duo agrees and picks at his sandwich. He should eat, but he doesn't feel hungry. He doesn't think he can stomach any food as he can't stop thinking about the other guys still back at Camp Sharana. He can't shake the feeling that he abandoned them when they needed him. He also wonders how Heero will handle being there without him. His own experience on base, without Heero at his side, hadn't been any fun; he had felt disconnected from everything and everyone.

"Thinking about Heero?"

"Yeah," Duo answers before he even realizes that he probably shouldn't be so candid. He shoots a look up at the other soldier and catches his knowing smile.

"Something is going on between the of you, isn't there?"

"Last I checked, Don't-Ask-Don't-Tell hasn't been repealed yet," Duo snaps, feeling attacked by the simple question. "So you shouldn't be asking me that."

"But there is something to tell," he surmises. "You're right though, I shouldn't have asked. It's none of my business."

He probably should have handled that better, since by snapping at the Private so defensively, he basically just admitted to something that he wasn't even really sure was happening; a relationship between him and Heero. He chews on the inside of his cheek.

"Don't worry about it, man. If I get the honor of serving with you and Yuy again, I'll keep my damn mouth shut. Because it doesn't matter." Follander looks at Duo poignantly. "The way I see it – no matter what – you guys are still on my team."

Duo releases a deep breath. He doesn't say anything, but he nods in gratitude. He is left to fret about whether the others noticed a change between him and Heero as well. But they hadn't been called in by their Staff Sergeant this entire time, so it's safe to assume that if anyone else had caught on, they didn't rat them out.

The departure of the flight to Michigan is announced and Follander pays for his coffee and pulled pork sandwich and gives Duo a half-hug, being careful to avoid his left shoulder. They say their goodbyes and Duo watches the Private head for his gate.

To kill time, he turns on his cellphone. Now that he is back in the United States, it works again. His family already knows he is coming and the screen lights up with excited texts and missed calls. He replies all of them, feigning enthusiasm.

Two hours later he crosses the airport to get to his plane to take him to New York. As he boards the airplane, he wishes it would take him back to Afghanistan. Not even the thought of his memory foam mattress, air-conditioning and barbeque-ribs can lift his spirits nor ease his guilt.

* * *

 **I SWEAR I considered having Duo die in the explosion. I swear. But that just ain't my brand of angst man. Nooo… my brand of angst is still to come. What do you think I have in store for them? :P**


	18. Chapter 18

**Author's note:**

 **Sorry for the delay. I had a bad weekend and to take my mind off things I watched The Lord of the Rings. It worked a little too well. On top of the fact that watching all three special edition movies takes up an entire day, the same thing that always happens, happened again: falling in love with Legolas (or rather; imagining Aragorn falling in love with him and vice versa). The rest is a rabbit hole of hopeless searches for good fanfiction and applying my mediocre video-editing to cut and paste together my favorite scenes and make little MV's (because I just can't get enough of that damn cute face!). Am I alone in this? Surely young Orlando Bloom in a blonde wig has this effect on more people? Surely?**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Eighteen**_

His mother, sister and girlfriend had been waiting for him at LaGuardia airport and seeing them did bring a smile to his face. He dropped his duffel bag to the floor to hug them all properly with his one mobile arm. The three of them fretted over his injuries and babied him as he expected they would.

After his previous two tours, the entire family and all of his friends had gathered at his parents' house for a party, but considering he got blown up this time around, the party had been postponed until next week and his mother drove him back to his apartment instead. Hilde was in the backseat with him, with her hand on his knee. She sported a big smile and couldn't take her eyes off him. He had trouble meeting her gaze. Being back in the real world made things as complicated as he had anticipated.

He knew he needed to be honest with her – he owed her that much – but he couldn't bring himself to say anything and just kept smiling at her.

His mother and sister dropped them off and Hilde led him up the stairs to their apartment.

Once inside, he headed straight for the bed and slept for twelve hours, only vaguely aware of Hilde joining him, getting up at some point, and then returning to him a few hours later. Not until he had caught up on some rest did he leave the bed and went through the hassle of giving himself a sponge bath in the bathroom, since he was covered in bandages that he wasn't supposed to get wet in a few more days. By the time he was done, the sponge was black with soot left over from the explosion and Afghani sand. When he emerged from the bathroom, Hilde had been changing the sheets on the bed.

She took care of him as he recovered. She cooked for him, helped him in and out of his clothes and pampered him. When she treated him to a handjob the second night, he didn't stop her, even though it didn't feel right. He also made no objections when she gave him a blowjob the next day. The spark between them had been long gone, since before Duo even left for his recent tour, but now that the time had come and there were no more excuses, ending the relationship frightened him. Inaction was much easier and much less confrontational.

What was he going to do after breaking up with her? Move to San Diego to be with Heero, or ask Heero to come live with him? That was such a big and serious step to take, especially for two men who hadn't even defined if they were in a relationship, if they wanted to be and even if they had any romantic feelings for each other to begin with. And _if_ they did, and if they were to move in together, their entire lives would change. Being in a relationship with someone of the same sex could get them discharged from the Marine Corps as long as DADT held up and they would have to out themselves to their friends and families without knowing what that would cost them. And what if, after all of that, it wouldn't work out and on top of everything else they would lose each other as well?

In the real world, it wasn't as easy as crawling into each other's cots, making eyes at each other in the Mess Hall and getting cheeky during a wrestling match.

In a way, the real world was more dangerous than the war zone: there were a lot of ways for a lot of people to get hurt.

He kept pushing his thoughts aside, since he couldn't figure any of this out without talking to Heero first and finding out what his intentions and expectations were. Before he knew where Heero stood, it seemed daft to even consider turning his life upside down.

On the fourth night in his own bed, he had sex with Hilde. It lacked the intensity that he had shared with Heero and he hated himself for the comparison, because he wasn't being fair to her. But his self-doubt led to indecision and for two weeks he pretended that nothing had changed, even though he was well aware he stood on the precipice of the biggest change of his life.

…

It is day 425: the rest of the unit is flying home.

Duo is at his mom's, listening to her talk as she plans out their entire trip to San Diego next week. It endears him to see her so excited; excited about meeting "Hero" and about going away for a weekend with her son.

"Maybe Hero can show us around," she muses as she scrolls through the webpage of a sightseeing tour of San Diego on her laptop.

Duo snorts and challenges: "As you going to keep calling him 'Hero' when we get there?"

"He can tell me himself how to pronounce his name, honey."

"And so can I. It's ' _Heero_ '." He tightens his mouth, he isn't prepared for the shivers saying that name elicits.

"That's not the point. I just need to meet him for myself."

"I know, mom. But please don't embarrass me. If you mispronounce his name, it's gonna seem like I never mentioned him, or never corrected you. Frankly, it might come across a little racist." He threw her a look.

"Oh shush, I'll be perfectly well-behaved."

"Alright. I'm counting on it." He fishes his phone out of his pocket with his right hand while his left hand plays with the stress ball his physical therapist has given him. He was freed from the sling just a few days earlier and his arm feels fine again, but he isn't supposed to overexert it and needs to gradually build up using it, since the dislocation has stretched the tendons and there is a risk of popping the bone out of the socket again if he pushes himself too far too soon. He is just happy he is allowed to drive again.

"Expecting a call?"

"Hm?" He looks up from his phone.

"You keep checking your phone," she points out.

"Oh. Everyone's flying home today," he explains absentmindedly and he pockets the device. "I'm hoping they'll text me, to let me know they got back safely."

"You haven't heard from any of them the past two weeks?"

He shakes his head and shrugs. "With only two weeks left, our privileges in the internet café were up." He jitters his leg nervously. Every time, he thinks about the fact that there could have been another attack on the compound or the unit could have gotten ambushed out in the field and he wouldn't even know about it; he wouldn't be contacted, since he's no one's next of kin.

"Are the others coming to the ceremony as well?"

"Maybe. I don't know."

"I hope so. I'd like to meet all of them. It's so strange to me that you have all these brothers and I – as your _mother_ – haven't even met them."

He smiles at her fondly.

"How are things between you and Hilde?"

He shifts in his seat at the sudden change in topic. "Uhh… It's fine, we're-… Actually, I don't feel like talking about it." The past few days she's been accusing him of being distracted and she said that she felt like he wasn't entirely back from Afghanistan. She is right, part of him is still out there, with Heero and he is waiting for that piece of him to return so can put the puzzle together and finally see the bigger picture.

"Duo, you know you can talk to me." She shuts her laptop and turns to face him fully. She leans in and puts her hands on his knees in such a simple yet loving gesture that it makes him want to weep and tell her that he can't stop thinking about this _man_ , and how conflicted he is because it excites him as much as it scares him.

"I know I can. But once I figure out what I want to say exactly, I should tell Hilde first. She should be the first to know. It's the least I owe her."

"I worry about you," she admits with a deep sadness in her eyes. "You've been different after this tour. It wasn't like this the other two times."

"I know. I'm sorry, mom. I'll be okay though, I promise." He is relieved to see her smile, even though it doesn't reach her eyes.

His phone vibrates in his pocket and he quickly slides it out. He frowns at the message on the screen.

 **Heero Yuy** _12:38 09/27/10_  
 _ **My plane lands at LaGuardia in one hour**_

His heart skips a beat, then it starts to thunder in his chest.

"Something wrong?" His mother inquires.

"Uhhh…" He can't answer as the next message appears.

 **Heero Yuy** _12:38 09/27/10_  
 _ **Are you free to come pick me up? ;)**_

Heero has never texted him before. They never had any contact the few months between tours. An odd thought pops up: _Heero never struck me as a winky-face type…_

"Duo," his mother insists.

"No, mom, it's- it's fine. Nothing's wrong, it's just-…" he stammers. He quickly types:

 _ **LaGuardia NY?**_

It is such a stupid question, but he needs to confirm because he won't believe it otherwise. Heero is supposed to be headed home, to the other side of the country, but he's landing here instead? And he wants him to come pick him up, so that must mean it isn't just a layover, right? His mind is running rampant.

 **Heero Yuy** _12:40 09/27/10_  
 _ **No, LaGuardia Reykjavic, dumbass**_

Duo smiles. _That sounds more like him._

 **Heero Yuy** _12:40 09/27/10_  
 _ **Shit, I'm pretty sure I just misspelled Reykjavic?**_

He lets out a chuckle and he looks up to see his mother grinning at him.

" _That's_ the son I sent off to war," she remarks and she looks relieved to see him smile like himself again.

He ignores her for the moment and types back:

 _ **I'll be waiting.**_

As an afterthought he adds:

 _ **In ReykjaviK.**_

 **Heero Yuy** _12:41 09/27/10_  
 _ **Don't be smug.**_

He slips his phone back into his pocket and gets up from his seat. "I gotta go, mom." He leans down to kiss her on her cheek. "I'll call you later, okay?" He waves her goodbye and ignores the curious question she calls after him.

Duo climbs behind the wheel of his car and races to the airport, even though he has plenty of time. His every atom buzzes with a nervous and excited energy and he is too frazzled to think. He just wants to see him. It's kind of like meeting him for the first time all over again, because it will be the first time they will see each other in the real world. He doesn't even know what Heero will look like in civilian clothes.

He parks his car on the third floor of the parking garage, where cars are pretty sparsely parked, since he doesn't feel like circling the lower floors for a tiny spot to squeeze his SUV into while his left arm still isn't fully mobile.

The arrivals hall is crowded with people and it makes him a little antsy. He meanders through the people to get to the front and picks a spot there, so he can keep an eye on the security check. He stands with his arms folded in front of his chest, holding onto his left arm to take the weight off the shoulder. It's been a little over an hour since he received Heero's text message, but the plane still has to taxi across the tarmac to get to the gate, the passengers have to disembark and then wait for their luggage.

Over half an hour later, people start pouring through the security check again, but it could be passengers from one of several planes arriving at the airport at the same time. Still, he keeps a trained eye on the security check and pays little attention to the faceless arrivals reuniting with their families and friends, even though he hears squeals of excitement around him. He tries to picture what it was going to be like when Heero would walk up to him, but he can't predict how either of them will feel and act. Everything is different in the real world.

Another fifteen minutes go by, with Duo keeping his eyes trained up ahead.

Heero is easy to identify. Duo spots him coming from a long distance. He is still wearing his fatigues –heavy boots, MARPAT desert pattern trousers, the faded moss green shirt and cap – his duffel bag and jacket are slung over his shoulder. Heero, however, can't pinpoint Duo in the crowd yet and he gets in line for the final security check.

Duo relaxes his arms and lets them hang at his sides. He drums his fingers against his outer thighs and bounces lightly on the balls of his feet. He chuckles sheepishly at his behavior and makes a conscious effort to hold still.

As Heero stands in line, an older couple standing behind him get his attention and the two take turns shaking his hand. Duo can't hear what they are saying, the exchange is too far away, but he knows how conversations like this go. He gets it all the time as well when he wears his uniform in public; strangers – especially older people – come up randomly to thank him for his service to his country.

He watches Heero smile and nod politely and then the Corporal steps forward because it's his turn. The customs agent goes through the same song and dance with him after checking his passport, even standing up so he can reach over the high counter to shake his hand. Just like Duo never knows what to say, Heero doesn't know what to say either, so he sticks with the same practiced smile and nod. It's not that they don't appreciate the show of gratitude, but it's awkward because they don't feel like anyone owes them a thank you.

The Corporal pockets his passport, adjusts his hold on his bag and walks by security with a final tip of his cap. His eyes scan the crowd of people and Duo raises his right hand in a halfhearted wave to help the man find him. Duo watches Heero's face light up and his pace slows momentarily before quickening as he makes a beeline towards him. His strides are large and determined. That bright smile never fades and Duo lets out an anxious breath before smiling back.

Here he is. In the real world. Duo's real world.

The distance between them is closed and when Heero is only one more step away from him, he drops his bag and jacket to the floor and doesn't think twice about pulling him into a hug. Duo wraps his arms around him tightly in return, even though he is aware of the people around them. But a hug should be perceived as innocent enough, even though it lingers longer than a hug between two men probably should. He touches his nose to Heero's neck and breathes in his scent. He smells of sunscreen, the desert, that generic shampoo Duo misses and coconut oil – which he apparently has found a use for beyond lubrication, or maybe he did it on purpose, as a subtle message.

They release and Heero takes his cap off and ruffles his hand through his hair to style it more playfully.

"One, two, three, four," Duo says, counting his friend's limbs.

"I can last two weeks without you," he banters and then adds with a different tone: "Barely." He studies Duo's face and Duo studies his. Heero smiles at what he sees.

That smile.

 _That smile._

It looks even better out here in the real world. It makes Duo _feel_ even better.

"How was it?" The Lance Corporal tries to keep a casual conversation going. It's weird when it shouldn't be.

"Most boring two weeks of my life." Heero picks up his bag and the two of them start in the direction of the parking garage. "How are you doing?"

"I'm fine. Healing well."

"Growing a beard?"

Duo scratches his fingers through the stubble on his jaw self-consciously. "Nah. Just… wasn't expecting any guests."

"I like it though."

"Yeah?" It's an odd admission and Duo is unsure how to react.

"Yeah, looks good. Manly," he jokes and he chuckles at himself before casting his gaze down.

Along the way they are approached two times by strangers conveying their appreciation to Heero and he accepts it in stride.

"The ceremony is going to be weird," Heero states as they follow the foot overpass that crosses the highway and connects the terminal with the parking structure. "It's going to be a full day of this; people acting like I'm the most special guy in the world."

Duo nods in understanding. He'd feel awkward being at the center of attention too. But Heero deserves the praise, since he _is_ the most special guy in the world, as far as Duo is concerned.

Their arms brush as they walk, from their shoulders down to their hands. When they enter the quiet parking garage, Duo feels Heero's fingers flex and touch his more deliberately. He seems to be testing the waters, thinking about connecting their hands. Once they reach the third floor, they are all alone. On their way to Duo's car, parked all the way in the back, Heero's knuckles brush his more purposefully, to announce his intentions, and then he laces their fingers together. Duo's heart races and he keeps his gaze focused up ahead, resisting the urge to look down to see what their hands look like, folded together like that, or look sideways at Heero. The man's hand is warm and dry. The palm is course, the same as Duo's. Their hands fit together well. The grip is loose and easy.

They are halfway to the car when Duo notices Heero looking around them and then the hand squeezes his and pulls at him until Duo ends up with his back against a parked van and Heero presses himself up against him. Their entwined hands are between their chests and Duo can feel both their heartbeats. Heero's free hand is cupping his face and he captures Duo's lips in a kiss.

The taller man is shocked at first and his gaze flits around them, but there is no one else to see and to see them. He relaxes and melts into the kiss, which he allows Heero to dominate.

The screech of tires as a car comes up the ramp to the third floor has them breaking apart before anyone sees them.

Heero grins at him with mischievous eyes and Duo mirrors the expression. He blushes when Heero reiterates: "I really like the scruff."

They reach Duo's car and Heero puts his bag in the trunk and climbs into the passenger seat. They don't talk again until Duo steers the car onto the highway.

"God, it's weird to be back," the newly arrived soldier states.

"I know, right?" He bites his lip before asking: "What are you doing here? Isn't your family expecting you?"

"They can last another week without me."

Duo raises his eyebrows at the offhanded remark. "A week? You- you want to stay the week?"

"Yeah. I figured we could fly out to San Diego together. You and your mom are still coming, right?" He flashes a smirk.

"For sure. We booked our tickets this afternoon." His gaze darts from one car to the next. _An entire week?_ He feels like he's a kid again, being shoved into the deep end of the pool by a group of bullies, before he could swim. He had always wanted to swim, but he never wanted to _have_ to swim, before he was ready.

"You don't mind, right?"

"Of course not." No, he didn't mind. He was happy to see Heero, but him staying the entire week meant he had a lot to figure out and fast too, because if that kiss was any indication, they weren't going to ease back into it. How is he going to handle Hilde? And his mother will want to meet him as soon as she gets wind that he's here – how is he going to introduce him and explain that Heero postponed reuniting with his family to spend the week with Duo? "Are you hungry? You wanna go grab a bite to eat?" He has to say something.

"I'd like a shower first and change out of these clothes, if that's alright."

"Totally. We'll go straight to my place then." Thank God Hilde is at work and will be going out to dinner with friends right after. But soon enough it's going to be a headache juggling the two of them until he finds the right time to have a talk with both.

"And then… maybe dinner, somewhere?"

The tentative suggestion sounds a lot like Heero asking him out on a date. A little grin tugs at the corner of his mouth. He likes it, even though the whole situation still scares the shit out of him. "Okay."

"Did you hear anything about Lindsey and Flint?"

The change of topic grounds him, reminding him that there are more serious things going on in the real world. "Yeah, I've kept in touch. Flint is okay, his arm will recover fully and he's home now. Lindsey is still in Bethesda to get treatment for his burns. He is going to be scarred, but other than that he got lucky."

Heero breathes a sigh of relief. "That's good."

Duo simply nods. He doesn't like thinking about it, it makes him nauseous.

"He's a strong kid; he's going to be okay."

"I think so too." _But it won't be easy._

"And Follander? Did he get a Bad Conduct Discharge?"

"Actually, no. But he'll be stuck doing paperwork for the rest of his military career."

"That's better than BCD. He got lucky too."

"He did." He chuckles wryly. "Worst tour ever and we somehow all end up scraping by."

"Yeah, we got lucky too," Heero says poignantly. He turns his head to look at Duo. "I consider myself very lucky."

Duo isn't sure if he's talking about surviving his shooting with his liver intact or if he's hinting at the thing that has blossomed between them. He feels Heero's hand on his knee and casts a look down. That's when he notices the black beaded bracelet on his wrist and he gets the impression Heero meant the latter of the two options and it makes him feel warm and light. "Me too." They really need to talk, but not in the car.

He parks his car in the garage under his building and offers to carry Heero's bag, since he must be tired after his long flight, but the Corporal scoffs and shoulders it himself.

"Home sweet home," Duo announces after unlocking the door and stepping aside to let Heero go inside first. He studies Heero as the man looks around himself, appraising the apartment. It's not much and most of the furniture was picked out by Hilde while Duo was away on one of his tours, but for better or worse, it's his home-base. He closes the door behind him and takes a moment for the fact to sink in that Corporal Heero Yuy is in his apartment. His "BSF" has stepped into his real world. For the first time he has to consider if, now that Heero was part of his real world, he deserved the moniker "BFF" over his childhood friend. He probably did. Heero knew him better than anyone. Being brothers in arms they were kindred spirits and that bonded them more than even a lifetime of lunches, coffees, movies, barbeques and game nights could.

But what about the title "boyfriend"?

"I like it," Heero concludes and faces Duo again. "I feel a little awkward though. This is all new."

Duo smiles, grateful that he isn't the only one. "Yeah."

"Can I take that shower first? I have sand everywhere and I stink."

"You smell great," he counters dreamily. "…You smell like coconut."

Heero cocks his head and smirks.

Duo snaps out of it and directs Heero to the bathroom: down the hall, second door to the left.

Heero digs a change of clothes out of his bag and heads for the bathroom.

"Clean towels are under the sink!" He calls after him. He hears the door close but not lock, then the water is turned on and soon after he hears Heero exclaim: "Ohh, yeah."

After pacing back and forth in the living room for a while, he decides to make himself useful and he goes into the kitchen to brew a pot of strong coffee. Heero is going to need the caffeine if he doesn't want to crash the way Duo did after arriving home. You never truly realize how exhausting tour is until after you come home. It's like the body becomes aware that it's in a safe space and it switches off the survivor-mode you've been in for over a year and leaves you running on a battery that hasn't been charged since you left for war.

He wants Heero to get the rest he needs, but now that he is here, their talk takes priority. Duo needs to figure out what they both see for their future, so he can adjust accordingly. He wants to try being with Heero, but he's afraid of all of the consequences they are going to face and he needs the other man's reassurance that they are both invested in this and that – whatever the outcome will be – it will be worth the risk.

The water is shut off just as the coffee machine beeps and stops the steady drizzle into the half-full pot. Duo thinks to check his fridge for food, in case Heero is hungry and might like a snack before they head out for dinner in a little while. He doesn't have much, but he can make him a sandwich, or he can have chips or chocolate if that better suits his cravings. Duo always gets mad cravings for food after the end of tour, but he has no idea what Heero's end-of-tour ritual and experience is like and how to play into that.

Heero rounds the corner and steps into view. His hair is still wet as he couldn't be bothered taking the time to properly towel-dry himself. He looks entirely different – a lot younger, boy-next-door, completely unintimidating and smaller, somehow – dressed in all-American blue jeans and a plain T-shirt. Duo is struck with the uncontrollable urge to hug him and he gives into it. In two steps he is in front of him and he envelopes him in his arms. Heero lets out a soft moan against his chest and he melts into the embrace and wraps his arms around the taller man, locking his hands at the small of his back.

"I've missed you," Heero whispers and makes no move to disentangle himself.

"Missed you too," he mumbles in response. "Told you I would."

"I didn't like being on base without you at all," the other discloses. "And then I realized I didn't like the thought of going home, where you aren't either, any more. I had to come see you."

"I'm glad you did." He pulled back enough to look at him.

Heero tugs at his bottom lip with his teeth. "…I want you to kiss me."

Duo happily heeds his request and connects their mouths. It's very different from their kiss in the parking lot. This time, the movement of their lips and tongue is sweet and loving. Duo pets his right hand through Heero's wet hair and places his left hand along his jaw, rubbing his thumb back and forth over his cheek in a gentle caress. Heero leans against him heavily and his fingers explore the expanse of Duo's back, not light enough to be ticklish, but causing him to shiver. After a while, those hands slips under his shirt and the skin-to-skin contact has Duo sighing.

Kissing him and touching him feels just as great in the real world as it did at Camp Sharana. He doesn't think he'll ever get enough of the other man.

"Bedroom?" Heero suggests.

Heat flares through his body at the simple word. "Don't you want to talk first? I have a lot I need to say."

"Me too. But let's first do the show portion of the show-and-tell."

"Hmmm…" He asserts control over the kiss, having Heero tilt his head so he can plunder his mouth. He breathes in sharply through his nose, not wanting their lips to part. Maybe talking can wait just a little while longer…

"I want you inside me…"

He groans. His arousal springs to life at that confession. _Talking will definitely have to wait_.

One hand navigates down and he presses the fingers into the cleft of Heero's ass and snakes deeper between his legs until he can feel the heat from his groin. Heero bucks his hips against him and claws at his back. Their kiss is interrupted as they both chuckle to relieve the tension they feel. Duo puts both hands on Heero's ass cheeks and steadies himself to prepare to lift him up and carry him to the bedroom, but he freezes at a metallic, jingling sound at the other side of the front door.

A key is inserted into the lock and the door opens.

Standing in the center of the kitchen, they can't be seen from the front door. Heero doesn't know who it could be, but Duo does. Thankfully, the Japanese-American detaches himself and takes a step back before Hilde rounds the corner.

She peeks into the kitchen with a quizzical expression, perhaps sensing the tense reaction to her presence, although she couldn't possible know what she has walked in on. Her gaze darts to the camouflage duffel bag on the floor and then back at Heero and her face lights up. "Oh my God! You must be Heero!" She exclaims.

Heero throws a look over his shoulder at Duo and by the time he faces forward again he is caught off guard by Hilde giving him a welcoming hug.

"I've heard so much about you!"

"Alright," Heero responds tersely. It has yet to click with him who he is faced with. During tour, Duo talked so much about how he had to break up with his Hilde as soon as he returned from tour, that Heero might assume the woman in front of him has to be his sister, not his girlfriend.

Duo's heart has leapt up into his throat, constricting him. He tries to swallow it down, not able to speak until he will manage. He watches Heero initiate a handshake with her.

"Nice to meet you."

She shakes his hand enthusiastically, wanting to be proper. "Very! I'm Hilde, obviously. I'm guessing you figured that out already." She is so genuinely happy to see him, because she knows how worried Duo has been for the soldier's safety since having to leave him behind in Afghanistan two weeks earlier. She knows how much it means to Duo for the man to be safely stateside again. She knows Heero is the reason Duo hasn't been himself the past two weeks, although she doesn't know the extent of the _why_.

With Heero standing in front of Duo, Duo can't see his face, but he sees his shoulders tense up.

"I'm sorry, I wish I could stay and chat with you and get all the dirty 'scuttlebutt' about Lance Corporal Maxwell, but I have to go," Hilde rambles on and she looks to Duo, "Marjorie is waiting for me in the car, downstairs, I just came up to get-… Well, it's been a long day and I need to restock my bag with ' _lady essentials_ '," she continues unabashedly.

"Right, yeah, I know. And you have dinner with the girls, I remember," he says stiffly.

Neither of the two men say anything as Hilde scampers into the bathroom where she noisily rips open a drawer to grab a handful of tampons. Heero won't even face him.

She returns sporting a sheepish smile and leans in to plant a kiss on her boyfriend's mouth, making an exaggerated "muah"-sound and then laughs as she wipes her red lipstick off his lips. Duo is completely shell-shocked by the entire situation and can't even move.

"I'll be back later tonight. Heero, I really hope you're staying in New York for a while, I can't wait to get to know the man behind the legend."

"Actually, I'm only here because of a layover. I'm flying home tonight," he declares and Duo winces at the change of plans.

"Oh, no. That's too bad." She pouts. "Maybe I can come to your ceremony next week? I'm still trying to negotiate with my boss to give me the time off." She lets out an exasperated sigh and then remembers that her friend is waiting for her. "I gotta fly. I'll see you later tonight, babe. Heero, it was really nice finally putting a face to the name."

"You too."

She waves goodbye and then leaves as quickly and as energetically as she entered. The door slams shut behind her.

Duo takes a breath and reaches out for Heero's shoulder. "Heero-"

The man flinches at the touch and shakes the hand off his shoulder. He crosses his arms in front of his chest defensively and looks up at Duo from underneath an angry and upset frown.

"I'm sorry." It's not enough, but it's how he has to start.

Heero throws in his face what Duo has been telling him for months: "You were going to break up with her."

"I know. I was going to tell her, when the times was right and I knew what to say."

"And when were you going to tell me that you hadn't yet?"

"When-… when the time was right."

Heero scoffs at the weak answer.

"It's just been so trippy being sent home early and my head has been a mess. All I've been thinking about is you and that I needed to talk with you first."

"Yeah? All you've been thinking about it me?" He challenges with a quirk of his eyebrow. "Even while playing house with her? And having sex with her?"

He is speechless. He feels horrible.

"You've been having sex with her, right?"

There was no point to denying it. He nods, shamefully, and casts his gaze down at his feet.

Heero hugs his arms tighter to his body, instinctively shielding himself from a threat that he can't protect himself against. His jaw is clenched in anger and betrayal. "Why? To tide yourself over until I got back, or because you've decided you like pussy better after all?"

He snaps his head up at Heero's biting remark. "Don't talk about her like that. She doesn't deserve to be reduced to just a hole to stick my dick in. You can't turn this around. I've been cheating on her with you, not the other way around."

"Oh, _fuck you_ , Duo!" He yells and he unfolds his arms to point at him angrily. "So I'm just 'the other woman' now?"

"That's not what I'm saying!" He tries. "I'm saying you're not the only one getting hurt by this situation. I've been waiting to talk to you before I break her heart."

"But you we're going to break up with her anyway! You've been saying that long before we started fucking around."

Duo recoils at the phrase. "Fucking around?" He questions. "Is that what this has been to you?"

Heero pushes at his chest and Duo seeks purchase on the edge of the counter to steady himself. "Of course not!"

"How am I supposed to know that? See? That's why it was important for us to talk first. It was your idea to hold off on figuring this thing out until we both got home from tour," he reminded him.

"Then what the fuck was this about?" Heero holds up his arm, displaying the bracelet on his wrist. "You said I was _yours_. I thought that meant something. I sure as Hell assumed that meant you were mine as well."

"It will if you still want it."

"Except you've been _hers_ for the past two weeks. No, you've been hers all along and I'm just the 'mistress'."

Duo shakes his head vehemently. "I haven't been hers in a long time. I should have ended it with Hilde right away, but I just wanted to be able to be honest with her when I break up with her. I wasn't going to tell her that the spark is gone and have her find out through mutual friends later that I'm with a man, if that would be the case. And I wasn't going to tell her I've been with someone else if that wouldn't amount to anything anyway. I owe her the truth, but I haven't been able to figure out what the fucking truth is!" He throws his hands up in desperation. "I didn't know what you wanted from me, from us - _for_ us. It would be different here. It wouldn't be as easy as just sneaking into each other's cots, here in the real world it would be a real relationship. We'd have to tell our friends and families, we'd have to figure out if one of us wants to move across the country." He took a deep breath as he ran out of air and became red-faced. "Over here, it's all-in and I assumed that'd scare you as much as it does me. I didn't know if we wanted 'all-in'. I don't know how I feel and I don't know how you feel."

Heero snorts and rolls his eyes up to the ceiling. "You can fucking spell 'Reykjavik', but you have to have everything else spelled out for you?"

Duo slumps his shoulders with a deep exhale, communicating how lost and confused he is. It seems to anger Heero further.

The man grits his teeth, trying to keep his emotions bottled up, but then he bursts: "I'm in love with you, you asshole!" His eyes widen at his own words. He clearly hadn't meant to confess as much. "Shit!" Heero berates himself.

It strikes Duo like lightning. It's exactly what he wants to hear, but the whole situation is so wrong that he doesn't know how to salvage it. He stands there with a shocked expression on his face.

"Don't look so fucking stupid," Heero growls at him.

"I really didn't know. I didn't dare to hope."

"Fuck you." He runs his hand through his hair and bemoans: "Oh, God, but I'm the stupid one, aren't I?"

He calms his voice. "You're not stupid."

"Well, I feel fucking stupid." The other lowers his hand and glares at the black bracelet. "I thought this was the most romantic gesture, that it meant that you loved me. That you _knew_ that you loved me. I had all these wild ideas about what it was going to be like. Of course I knew it would be tough, working at a relationship, but I thought you were telling me that you were certain we'd be worth the trouble. I wasn't scared and I thought you weren't either. But now it's like…" he shrugs and he has the most heartbreaking, dejected look on his face. "You weren't making me any promises. All it is are 'maybe's' and 'guess so's', and I read way too much into it." He slips the bracelet off his wrist and puts it down on the counter. He fingers it idly before sliding it further away from him.

"I wasn't sure, but I am sure now," he stresses. "I want us to try to make this work."

"Because I threw a fit in front of you and you don't want to see me hurting," Heero snaps. "You never want to hurt people, because you can't stand being the bad guy." The way he says it makes it sound like a bad thing. "You never broke up with Hilde because you didn't want to hurt her feelings. And now what? You figure you might as well be with me because you don't want to hurt me?" He scoffs and wraps his arms around himself again. "Go be Hilde's hero, Duo." He walks around the breakfast bar and picks his bag up from the floor.

"Heero, I'm sorry. Please give me a chance to make this right."

"I'm doing you a favor, Duo. Now you don't have to face your fears and you don't have to come clean to Hilde… You may have stepped between me and a bomb, but you're a Goddamn coward." He hoists the strap of his bag over his shoulder and he heads for the door.

"Please don't go," Duo tries and his heart skips a beat when Heero pauses in the door opening.

He sighs and looks down at his feet. "You know, you could have stopped me, with just three words. But those aren't it." He takes a step and closes the door behind him.

He knows what Heero means and he realizes the Corporal is right: he is a coward. He didn't say those three words, not because he didn't feel that way, but because he was afraid they wouldn't make a difference anyway, not anymore, and he was looking out to protect his own feelings as much as he always wanted to protect anyone else from getting hurt.

As a soldier, he was fearless, but as a man, he lacked bravery. At war, he was like fire, blazing a path. At home, he was like water, yielding to every obstacle.

Hilde comes home later that evening to find him in a near catatonic state. And when he falls asleep that night, the nightmare of Heero sinking into the red sand returns.

* * *

 **I should write soap operas.**

 **ONE more chapter!**


	19. Chapter 19

**Author's note:**

 **Final chapter!**

 **I've really enjoyed working on this story, with the new approach of allowing myself the liberty to produce short chapters and not putting too much pressure on myself. I think it has worked well and it's definitely the way fo me to tackle stories from now on. I want to try to focus on finishing "Dirty Job" now, before I move on to "Grounded", although I might not be able to fully curb my enthusiasm.**

 **Hopefully, you'll enjoy this last chapter. Please let me know what you thought of the story.**

* * *

 **The Princess With The Purple Heart**

 _ **Nineteen**_

He sits in the back row of the auditorium of the community center. A lot of people have gathered, but everyone is quiet and facing forward.

General Khushrenada stands at the microphone podium at the center of the stage, halfway into a speech that details Corporal Yuy's bravery at length. He speaks with sincerity and admiration and casts looks at the man of the hour and gestures at him.

Heero stands to the General's right, looking sharp in his dress uniform. His shoulders are rigid and proud, wearing the midnight blue coat with red piping, which is cinched at the waist by the white belt that has the ceremonial sword strapped to it. His legs are endlessly long in the sky blue pants. The white gloves and cap complete the formal nature of the uniform. Duo is wearing the same dress blues, as are all the others from the Marine Corps. Their entire unit is present, with the exception of Lindsey, but the young soldier wrote a brief letter that their Staff Sergeant read out loud before calling the General up to the stage.

As the speech goes on, Duo knows the Corporal is struggling not to squirm as he stands at the center of everyone's attention. He knows him well, and he can see it in the tightness in his mouth, even from far away. Heero keeps looking at the front row, where his family is seated. He can't look any further out, he doesn't dare to make eye-contact with anyone else, because it would make him more self-conscious. The seats are filled with over two hundred people easily: extended family and friends, neighbors and other people from the community, as well as a number of his brothers in arms, not just from the unit he served with on tour, but from his time during basic training as well. Everyone has come to honor him, because everyone knows that his bravery is not limited to that one moment in the desert and they are all grateful.

Duo peels his eyes away from the man when he feels a hand land on his knee. He looks at the hand first and then at his mother's face. She smiles reassuringly at him. Just like Duo can read the nervousness on Heero, she can read it on him, and she offers him comfort.

"… And thus, it is with great honor that I present to Corporal Yuy The Silver Star Medal," the General concludes. "Your heroism serves this country and your men beyond the expectations that come with the uniform. On behalf of every man and woman of the United States Marine Corps, I thank you for your courage." With a flat, square box in his hands he steps away from the microphone and marches over to Heero. A private comes on stage to stand next to them and takes the box from the General and holds it open for him.

The medal – which is actually a gold star, hanging off a red, white and blue ribbon - gleams in the light and Duo smiles when he catches Heero sneaking a peek at it before stoically forcing his gaze up ahead, but his Adam's apple moves as he swallows. Duo is pretty sure the Corporal is more afraid now, than he was running into the line of fire to get that grenade out of range.

The General takes the medal from the velvet-lined box and solemnly pins it onto Heero's dress coat, over the left side of his chest and then adjusts the star to make sure it hangs straight. The Private snaps the box shut and struts off stage. General Khushrenada takes a step back and salutes the Corporal with sharp, precise movements. Heero salutes him in return.

Every enlisted man and woman in the audience rises to their feet and gives salute as well.

Duo stands stiffly and his hand trembles next to his forehead. Heero doesn't see him and it's probably for the better; he doesn't want to ruin this moment for him if it turns out Heero didn't want him there after everything that was said last time they met.

Heero and Khushrenada shake hands and that's when everyone else stands up as well and applauds.

Heero smiles uneasily with a blush on his cheeks. He makes a small bow to humbly convey his gratitude and then hurries after the General, walking off the stage, where everyone proceeds to crowd him to congratulate him in person once more. His mother is the first to stand in front of him and she hugs him tightly and for a long time and then appraises the gold star while clasping a hand over her mouth, obviously emotional at seeing her son be validated like that. She seems like a lovely, caring person and Duo hopes he'll get the chance to meet her.

His own mother locks her arm around his and presses her cheek against his shoulder. "You may not have a medal, but I am just as proud of you."

"I know, mom. But thanks."

They remain at the back. He doesn't bother getting in line to shake hands with Heero, because he has to say things that have to be said in private. He waits for everyone to finish congratulating him and for the crowd to gravitate to the left side of the space where a buffet of finger foods is laid out, and people break off into smaller groups to catch up. Duo spots his unit, raiding the tray of crab cakes and waving him over. He motions for them to give him a minute and he gets a couple of thumbs-up's in response.

He detaches himself from his mother and asks: "Do you mind if I talk to Heero alone for a little bit first?"

"Of course not, darling. Go right ahead. I've waited years for you to introduce me to him, I think I can manage my impatience a little longer," she says smugly.

He leaves her at the back row of chairs and walks up to the front, where Heero stands surrounded by his close relatives. His mother holds onto him the way Duo's mother held him just now, with their arms interlocked and her cheek on his shoulder. Heero got his blue eyes from his mother. Hers sparkle with pride.

As he approaches, Heero notices him and visibly stiffens. Duo politely inserts himself into the circle of people and tries not to let his nerves get the better of him, feeling everyone's eyes on him. He salutes his friend first. Seeing him in his dress uniform, with the impressive medal pinned onto his chest, triggers the formality in him. Heero returns the gesture with the question about what Duo is even doing here evident in his eyes.

"Congratulations," Duo starts and he nods at Heero's mother as well.

"Thank you," Heero responds stiffly.

"I was hoping we could talk. In private? But only if you want."

The delay lasts only a second, but it drags on like eternity for Duo. "…Sure." He steps away from his family and motions for Duo to follow him.

The Lance Corporal trails after the decorated soldier and he is led down a hallway to a private, administrative office. The desk is cluttered, with an old desktop computer monitor in the corner, and the walls are covered with posters from past events hosted at the center. One of them features Heero and three other soldiers that Duo assumes are locals; it advertises a going-away and good-luck party and it's dated the day before they shipped off for their last tour – the tour that changed everything. The location was obviously chosen for the ceremony because it has played a part in Heero's life, rooted in his community and their support for him.

"I hope it's okay that I came," he expresses.

Heero brushes it off as meaningless by pointing out: "Everyone's here, so…"

"I'm not here out of duty."

"Okay. Why are you here?" He shoots back.

"To do something brave in the real world, for once. To take a chance and put myself out there, even though I know I'll likely get hurt."

Heero stares at him and waits.

"I've loved you for a long time, you know this. But I want you to know that I'm _in love_ with you," he declares. He takes a deep breath and straightens his shoulders. Heero appears unaffected by the confession and it hurts, but he can't let that deter him. Heero deserves to know how he feels. "I let my fear get the better of me. I'm not as brave as you and I fucked up waiting for you to take the lead; waiting for validation from you when I should have had the guts to own up to my feelings on my own. I let you down and I'm sorry."

After a meaningful pause, Duo continues: "I broke up with Hilde. I told her I'm in love with someone else. I told her I'm in love with you."

Heero draws in a shaky breath.

"I'm not telling you this to win you back, I'm just saying this because I don't want my best friend to remember me as a coward. I want him-" He chuckles sheepishly, "I want you to know that you are worth every risk and that you mean more to me than anybody else, even when I can't have you. It's not that I'm not scared anymore, but being brave isn't about not being scared; it's about facing your fears. And I am. I owe that to you." Heero is giving him nothing but silence, but Duo feels encouraged by the fact that he hasn't been walked out on, or told to piss off. "I told my mom too; that I'm in love with you."

Finally, Heero speaks and his tone is laced with concern and care. "How did she take it?"

Duo smiles and his eyes become watery. "She's here," he states simply. "She wants to meet you now more than ever." Telling his mother – and then later his sister – had been the hardest thing Duo had ever done. He had been sick to his stomach, but when they smiled at him, he had never felt better.

"…I told my mom as well," Heero discloses. "I called her from the plane and told her why I was going to stay in New York for the first week. Or… was planning to, anyway."

"And she's here too." It's evidence that she was also supportive.

"She said she's known for a while that I might be gay." He chews on the inside of his cheek. "I didn't know."

Duo dares to let out a chuckle at the dry remark.

Heero deflates and he shakes off his defensive posture. He leans back against the desk and casts a pensive look out the window. "I think I might have overreacted last week."

"No, you had every ri-"

"No, please, you don't have to do that," Heero interrupts and he goes on to explain: "It should be okay to be scared. And maybe it's good that you wanted to really think about it first and not jump into anything blindly. You could have handled it better, but the same goes for me. I just got-…" He squeezes his eyes shut and clamps his fingers around the edge of the desk, on either side of his hips. "I got _so jealous_. The thought of you sleeping with her drove me crazy. I thought that I couldn't give you what she gave you. That it meant that you couldn't love me because I'm a man, and you still preferred women."

"I prefer you."

A smile tugs at Heero's lips. "I wasn't being reasonable. I was exhausted and emotional. We should have talked everything out first. I shouldn't have let the whole bracelet-thing get to my head like that, but that was right after I thought I could lose you and everything I was feeling in that moment was so… intense." He makes a vague, waving gesture with his hands to represent all kinds of stimulation overwhelming him. "I filled in blanks when I shouldn't have. I thought that was the talk that we were supposed to have, but now that I can think more clearly, I know it wasn't the time and the place. This, this is the talk. Everything before now is off the record," he decides.

"Yeah?" Duo's voice has a silly, hopeful tone to it.

"Yeah." He nods definitively.

"Then let me just say – officially – that I'm in love with you and I want to be with you and while I'm still afraid of what that might cost me, I will be brave in the face of my fears." He reached into the pocket of his pants and opened his palm to show the black bracelet. "Because I know for damn sure you're worth it."

Heero pushes off the desk and in one step he is standing closely in front of Duo.

"Can we redo 'the whole bracelet thing'?"

"Is it going to mean what I want it to mean this time?" Heero contends cheekily.

"I don't know. It means that you're gonna be stuck with me and won't ever be able to get rid of me. Is that what you want?"

Heero doesn't say anything, he just holds out his hand, with his fingers pinched together. Duo gets the cue and he slips the elastic bracelet onto his wrist. Duo grins from ear to ear. This time, he can feel how official it is; he feels the weight of the moment and it grounds him. It makes him feel anchored in the real world and he likes it. He throws a look over his shoulder at the door. Confirming that the coast it clear, he takes off both their white caps and reverently presses a kiss to Heero's lips to seal the deal.

Heero blinks his eyes open after Duo pulls back and he lets out a chuckle when the Lance Corporal plops his cap back on top of his head, crooked. He reaches up to adjust it. "What happens now?"

"Now? Now I'm gonna wipe this stupid grin off my face and I'm going to introduce you to my mom."

"And then what?"

He shrugs. "And then we're gonna go back to your place and I'm going to make love to you."

Heero smiles. "It's that simple, huh?"

"This part is." He leans in to kiss him again, tilting his head to avoid knocking their caps off. They kiss more passionately this time, because Duo can't help himself. Seeing Heero so happy, just makes him want to make him even more happy and then drink it all up. "I guess we'll arm-wrestle to decide if you move to New York, or if I'm staying in San Diego," he jokes.

Heero lets out a rumbling laugh.

Duo pinches his brows together in a frown and thinks better of it, remembering all the times Heero beat him at arm-wrestling. "Actually, no. I'll just have to convince you that New York is better." He thinks for a moment and offers facetiously: "We have Broadway."

Heero scoffs and counters: "We have Tijuana."

"Dammit… Yankees!"

"Pfff. Comic Con."

"Empire State Building," he says dramatically.

Heero quirks an eyebrow. "Surfing."

"New York pizza."

"In-N-out."

Duo laughs and shakes his head. He flings his arm around Heero's shoulder and guides him out of the office so he can rejoin the party in his honor. He suggests flippantly: "Rock-paper-scissors?"

Heero chuckles.

Before they walk back within view of the other guests, Duo pulls the Corporal against him more tightly and he studies his features in the dim lighting of the hallway. "I love you, Purple Heart."

"Love you, Princess."

* * *

 **God! I just couldn't do it! I couldn't** _ **not**_ **write a sappy ending. It's basically my trademark.**

 **POLL: Should I try a sad ending for a story? Personally, when I read something, a sad ending (especially after a long story) disappoints/pisses me off, but maybe you guys might like it once in a while?**


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